Suprise Guests
by S1SKA
Summary: Aoi is just your average girl. What happens when a certain group of S-ranked criminals appear in her closet? Rated T because I doubt that continuous knifing is kid-appropriate. FOREVER HIATUS'ed.
1. Clean up

Surprise Guests Ch. 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream… *drools*

Sunlight streamed through the windows of my bedroom window as the alarm went off. *Stupid alarm clock.* A pale hand –my hand- shot out from the warm comforters, fumbling around to find the stupid alarm clock. I pull myself up to look at the time. *Are you kidding me? It's only 6:30 am!* I groan and get out of bed. Once I'm up, I'm up. No use trying to get back to sleep. I make sure the alarm is off before heading towards the bathroom.

In the bathroom, I look in the mirror and examine myself. I look very ordinary, there's nothing unusual or outstanding about me. My black hair, though plain, is long and silky, reaching to the small of my back. Bangs that go just past my eyebrows frame my heart-shaped face. My cheeks and lips are rosy and red, but I tend to blush way too easily. The only thing people actually notice about me are my eyes. Deep, dark blue windows that [supposedly] lead to the soul.

Back in the room, while I change, I realize that it's way too messy. I'll have to clean up before Midori- nee-chan comes over. Oh well. Cleaning up can wait until after breakfast.

Downstairs, I pull out milk and cereal for breakfast. I turn on my laptop as I pour the cereal, and then the milk. While eating, I make sure to check my email. I accidentally open up one those chain letters.

"Make your dream come true! Forward this to 10 people, and within 24 hours, you dream will come true."

Some of the people sending the message put comments. These varied from "OMG it really works" to "It doesn't actually work, but I'll just plague your inboxes anyways."

Ah, what the heck. Might as well. I type in my friend's email addresses and hit send. What did I wish for? That someone-maybe even some someone _s_- special will come into my life. Oh, I got what I wished for, alright. But in ways I would have never imagined possible.

* * *

After breakfast, I put away the dishes and grab a couple trash bags on my way up. I open the door to my room carefully, re-assessing the damage. Countless clothes- clean or not, I couldn't tell, lay strewn everywhere. Multiple stacks of books and manga were scattered across the floor. Heck, I couldn't even see the floor, except for a couple holes here and there that I used to move around my room. Sighing, I pick up the trash bags and start.

The better portion of my morning-and some of the afternoon, too- was spent hauling clothes to the washer, wiping and dusting off all the surfaces, organizing everything and basically cleaning up my room. Sighing once more, I step back to admire my handiwork. The clothes that littered, well, everywhere, now either sat, folded up, in drawers or cleaning in the washer. The books and manga now were arranged in alphabetical order in bookshelves. My desk was neat and organized. I could actually see the floor and walk across the room without tripping over anything! [Well, my own two feet don't really count] All that was left was to hang some clothes in my now-empty closet.

Then, my stomach complained. FOOD!! I checked the clock: it was now almost 2:30-definitely time to eat. I ordered Chinese take-out. It's fast, cheap, and they do deliveries. The Chowmein and fried rice came within 30 min. Surprisingly, there was a fortune cookie. Odd. Old Man Chang's never gave out fortune cookies. Even stranger was the message inside.

"_If someone special is what you desire,_

_Than your wish will be granted within the hour."_

As soon as I finished reading the fortune, a loud thump came from upstairs- as if someone fell from the ceiling. Hoping it was just a book [case-only a book wouldn't make so much noise], I cautiously crept upstairs to investigate the source of the noise. I knew that the noise came from my room. But what could have caused it? I nudged the door open, and slowly take a look around my sparkly-clean room. Nothing was out of place except for a couple of books, which I replaced. I guess that's what fell down. "But," a nagging voice in the back of my head said, "What caused it to fall?"

I walked upstairs to the attic-y room, and grab a bunch of clothes hangers- my empty closet was waiting. Back down the stairs, grab a shirt, hang it, open the closet and-

* * *

A/N: Okay, that's it for my very first chapter of my very first fanfic! My writing's still pretty…bad… hope you liked? The characters will come in soon…enough…

OMG! A cliffy!!! I've always wanted to do one. I'm so evil…


	2. Chu

Surprise Guests 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream….

Recap:

_I walked upstairs to the attic-y room, and grab a bunch of clothes hangers- my empty closet was waiting. Back down the stairs, grab a shirt, hang it, open the closet and-_

A single bright blue eye stared at me. I drop my shirt and stare back. I blink, unsure if there really was someone there, or I was just imagining it. And then I blinked again, having just realized that there was someone in my closet. And then I slammed the door shut into his/her face. My heart decided to start thumping at a hundred miles an hour. *Since when did people start camping in my closet?*

"Ow! What was that for, un?!" Definitely a guy.  
Just as quickly, I open the door again. *Ah, crud.*

Inside my closet were two guys decked out in similar black cloaks with red clouds. One, a blonde, was clutching his head in pain. I guessed that he was around his late teens. The other had spiky black hair and was wearing a swirly orange mask, so I couldn't tell how old he was.

I groaned. I guessed that my best "Why me?" expression was on my face. Of all the times people appear in my closet, it just HAD to be the day when Midori-nee-chan comes over. And so, to relieve my head of such torture, I start banging my head against the wall, all the while screaming [mentally] *Why me? Why, why, WHY me?* Meanwhile, the two "guests" stared at me.

And then I remembered all the important stuff. Pointing and accusing finger at the two, I ask/scream/yell, "Who are you? How on earth did you get in my closet?"

"Tobi doesn't know. But Tobi's still a good boy, right?"

"I don't know either, un."

"Whatever. What're your names, anyways?"

"I'm Deidara," the blond said, "and he's Tobi, un."

Tobi glomped me, knocking me down to the floor. "Tobi's a good boy!"

"Ow….Tobi, was it?" I asked in my sickeningly sweet voice-the kind used to tempt children with candy.

"Uh-huh." He nodded his head eagerly.

"GET OFFA ME!!!!"

Tobi hurriedly obliged, bumping into Deidara. The blond consequently fell over, losing his balance. He knocked me down, and somehow landed on top of me. As if that wasn't to emotionally scar me for life. Noooooo, he just **had** to be tall enough so that our lips were touching. Both of our eyes widened with shock, and I just _knew_ that my face was red as a beet. At the moment, it hadn't registered in my mind to push him off.

Of course Tobi found his way to my Polaroid Camera collection. And of course he had the camera facing us as he toyed with it. And of course he figured out how to turn it on, and of course he would press the button. And last but not least, of course the picture he took would be perfect.

I must have the worst luck possible.

Then, the little photo came spurting out.

"Hey, Girl-chan, what's this?" [Tobi didn't know my name, sooo Girl-chan it is.]

After a few moments, the photo cleared,

"AWWWW, Sempai and Girl-chan are sooooo Kawaiii!!!"

When Tobi had said this, Deidara had managed to get his face off of mines and we were just staring at each other. And then we both glared at him.

"Tooooobiiiiiiii…"

"Eeep!!!" And Tobi ran off, like he was being chased by evil spirits. In a way, he was.

* * *

-End Chappie-

A/N: Aaahhhh My chapters are soooo short! Sorry!!

I'm evil, though. A kiss within the second chapter. Muhahahaha! In fact, they didn't even know each other for five minutes. Aaahh, Aoi-chan must have really bad luck.

Sorry about the chapters being so short. I'm planning on making them longer.

Review!!! I live on reviews!!!

**Neverending Pain**: Well here it is! The next update!!! Wheeee!!!


	3. Death?

Surprise Guests Ch. 3

Disclaimer: Me no own anything. I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _"Tooooobiiiiiiii…"_

"_Eeep!!!" And Tobi ran off, like he was being chased by evil spirits. In a way, he was._

An hour or so later, after Tobi was thoroughly punished, I sat in the dining room chair, thinking. I was slumped over the table until Deidara walked up to me and poked me.

"Ano..." he started, "What was your name again, un."

"Gaaahhhh!!" I could've sworn my house shook. Once again I took to banging my head against the table. *Why, why, WHY must my first kiss go to some guy I hardly even know? He doesn't even now my name!!*

"Whoa, watch it!" he grabbed my head and made me turn around so that I faced him.

"You're gonna hurt yourself, un." He moved a little closer, examining my abused forehead.

"I think it's already starting to bruise, un. Why are you doing this to yourself, un?"

I felt my face start to heat up-his face was just so close to mines! And then, sure enough, my wonderfully helpful head decided to plague my mind with certain… unwanted memories of the kiss. Like jow soft his lips were, or how his bangs brushed against my forehead, or how wide his ocean blue eyes were, or…

*Enough!!!* I started shaking my head violently to clear it of such thoughts.

"Hey, are you alright, un."

I sighed. "Yeah, I'm fine." I tried to smile, but it came out awfully grimace-looking.

"By the way, my name's Aoi Toshima."

"Waahhhhhh!"Tobi came running, and soon had my head in a choke-hold kind of hug. "Aoi-chan! Tobi didn't mean to make you mad!! Tobi's sorry! Tobi's sorry about not knowing your name, too!! Tobi's still a good boy, right?"

"Oww, Tobi let go! I can't … breathe…"

And I fainted.

Deidara, who was lost in his thoughts, turned around and frowned.

"Tobi! Bad boy! I turn around for one second and you're killing her! Let go of her, for the sake of some guy named Toshiro!"

Meanwhile, in a different world, Captain Toshiro sneezed.

"Captain, are you okay?" Masumoto asked.

"Yeah, it's probably just some one talking about me. Finish your paperwork, Masumoto."

_Back at my house…_

Tobi had let go of me, but I still wasn't breathing. Deidara checked my pulse.

"Ah, crud. How on earth can someone be so fragile?"

Deidara started the CPR, but my limp, lifeless body was still unresponsive.

1…

2…

3…

1…

2…

3…

1…

2…

3…

Several minutes later, it was clear that I was dead.

"Tobi, bad boy! You killed her, dang it!!!"

"Waaahhh!!! Aoi-chan, Tobi's sorry!! Tobi's sorry!" he said that frantically, repeatedly, shaking my limp body.

"Well," Deidara said, "Sorry's not bringing her back, un."

* * *

---End Chappie---

A/N: Wow, I feel so evil. First a kiss, then she's dead.

Sorry, this one's shorter than the one before it- I promise you: the next one is _almost_ 1,000 words. Patience!

**VampireWolfGirl:** Thanks for adding my story to your Fave Story/story alerts!!!

**Piper**: Yesh!!! Make me live!!!

Review! I live off of Reviews!!! And if I'm alive, that means I can update!!!

Oh yeah! Before I forget!! Who should appear next in this story?

Itachi and Kisame?

Hidan and Kakazu?

Or Zetsu?

Tell me!!! Wheeee!!!


	4. Enter Midori

Surprise Guests 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _"Waaahhh!!! Aoi-chan, Tobi's sorry!! Tobi's sorry!" he said that frantically, repeatedly, shaking my limp body._

"_Well," Deidara said, "Sorry's not bringing her back, un."_

Deidara POV

"Tobi, she's dead." I say, pulling the boy off. "Dead people don't come back to life, un. For now, let's worry about the more important stuff."

"But what's more important than Aoi-chan? She's dead!!!"

"Just like you said, Tobi, she's dead! We can't do anything about it, un. Right now, we should find out where the heck we are. Check out that room over there, un," I say, pointing towards what looked like a living room.

I looked through the kitchen, but there was nothing really out of place or anything I could use to tell where we were. But there were a couple of interesting electronics. I couldn't tell what they were.

"Sempai! Sempai! Come here!" Tobi said. He was looking out the window. Surely it wasn't that different, right.

"What is it, Tobi, un?" I move towards the window. Looking outside, I found out that it really was drastically different. Paved streets held what seemed to be some kind of vehicle. The houses were straight, simple, but looked nothing like what there was in any of the villages I've seen. There weather was similar to Konohagakure, but just a bit foggier. It was clear that we weren't in any of the Five Great Shinobi Village. But we were in some kind of city… but where?

"Tobi, look through those bookshelves. See if you can find anything that will tell us where we are, un."

I went this time to the dining room, but again, nothing out of the ordinary.

"Sempai, sempai!" Tobi cried. "Look! All of these books are in a different language!"

Taking the book out of Tobi's hand, I find out that he's right. It's almost like we're in a completely different world. Then how did we understand Aoi-san? Hmmmm… thoughts, thoughts.

All of a sudden the doorbell rang, and then the front door opened.

"Aoi-chan, I'm hoome~!"

A girl came skipping in the house. She looked exactly like Aoi-san, except for her eyes, which were green instead of blue.

"Eh, Gomen." She noticed me standing there in the dining room and bowed.

"I didn't know that Aoi-chan had a boyfriend-"Then she looked up.

"OMG you look just like Deidara!"

"Wha- how do you know my name, un!!"

"Whoa, you're one heck of a real good cosplayer." Then she started walking around me, examining my cloak, my headband, my hair- everything!

"Dang, how long did it take you to make all this stuff? You even have that scope-y-majiggy! Cool! Where's Aoi-chan?"

"Ano… Tobi here," I grabbed Tobi by the back of his cloak and pointed, "Kinda, um, killed her, un."

"Tobi's so sorry!" He went to his knees and clasped his hands together, anime tears running out of the eyehole.

"It's okay." She patted Tobi's head. "Tobi's a good boy!!"

"Yeah," Tobi said, completely back to his old, annoying self. How did she know what to say?

"Oh yeah, my name's Midori. Aoi's my sister. What're your names?"

*So we're just gonna ignore the fact that your sister's dead…*

"My name's Deidara, and he's Tobi."

"No, no, what's your _real_ name?" she said, laughing. "Not who you're cosplaying as, silly!"

"My name _is_ Deidara!"

"Ummm… let me see your hand." She said, grabbing my hand. She pokes it and the mouth-hand licks her.

"Whoa!! You really are Deidara! What the heck are you doing in my house!!"

"What do you mean, 'I'm really Deidara?' How many Deidaras can there be?"

"No, no, it's not that," she said, waving her hand. "You're not supposed to be real. You're characters in a manga."

"Characters… in a manga?" I said, confused.

"Yeah, lemme show you," Midori-san said, digging through her luggage. She pulls out a book- of course I couldn't read it.

"Here, Naruto number 28!! Your debut in the Naruto manga!!" She holds up the manga proudly.

"But, I can't read whatever language this is in."

She looks shocked. "Whaddya mean, you can't read English? You're speaking it very fluently!!!"

"Aren't I speaking Japanese?" Great. Now we're both confused.

"I guess you can somehow understand it when I talk, then. Anyways, this…" she flips to the page. "is Ch. 247, pg. 12!! Your debut!!!"

I look, and there's what looks like Sasori's puppet, Hiroku, and me crossing the dessert.

*I remember that…* The next page shows Sasori and me talking. Naturally, it was in… English, so I couldn't read it.

Midori-san read it aloud.

"So, the ones Orochimaru manipulated are ahead, un."

I stiffen-those were the exact words I said.

"'It seems for some reason, he leaked our information and turned into a traitor, un.' 'We don't have a choice, it seems. I don't know what he's like after using that jutsu either. Is it alright with just that bag? Our opponent uses the "Power of Human Sacrifice."' 'My jutsus are all artistic… so I came up with my favorite, no. 18, un. Because our opponent is…'" she turns the page. "'The "One Tail", un.' 'What's that?' *Looks like red clouds on black cloaks… that's…!"

"There," she said, snapping the book closed. "That enough proof for ya?"

"Yeah…" I'm still uneasy about the whole "I'm-a-character-in-a-manga" thing.

"Oh yeah! I almost forgot! Where's my sister?"

I sweatdrop. "You forgot about your own sister's death?"

"Whaddya mean? Happens all the time. You just gotta know how to wake her up." She moves next to Aoi's body. With her hand, she tilts Aoi's head to the side, so her right cheek is facing up. And then she licks her face.

Aoi's eyes snap open, her hand slaps her face to wipe off the spit. "What happened?"

* * *

-End Chappie-

A/N:

Wow, the longest chappie eva!! I'll try to keep all of the chapters about this long from now on. It's just that before, it seemed like such a good place to leave off- [Aoi: Admit it- you were lazy.]

No, it really did seem to be a good place to leave off. It seemed plenty long in my notebook. [Aoi: but that was in your notebook.]

Fine, fine, I was lazy. Humph.

Review!! I live on reviews!!!

**Meco45:** Yup, They're Death Glomps! Maybe you'll find out what they mean later *hint, hint, nudge, nudge, cough, cough, poke, poke-*[ Aoi: Okay! We get it already!!! ] Thanks for the story alert!!

**Piper: **Thanks for the super long review!! Glad you like it!Maybe I'll include that tidbit in one of my later stories… One in for Zetsu!!

**VampireWolfGirl:** One in for Hidan and Kakuzu[Apparently, that's how ff . net says to spell it… I always thought it was Kakazu… strange.]

**Important!!!**

I can't write Ch. 6 until I get enough votes for who's gonna come in next!!! Vote!!!

**Hidan and Kakuzu**- 1

**Zetsu**- 1

**Itachi and Kisame**- 0

I'll have the runner ups appear in that order -2nd, 3rd, etc.

I'll probably put up Ch. 5 tomorrow, and Ch. 6 up the day after, IF I get enough votes. Because I can't write Ch. 6 without knowing who you guys want to appear next. So vote!!!

Ja, ne!!! ~S1SKA


	5. Purple Flying Ponies

Surprise Guest Ch. 5

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto!!! I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _Aoi's eyes snap open, her hand slaps her face to wipe off the spit. "What happened?"_

Aoi Pov

_Ahhhh… such a nice dream… _

_I'm just floating in… nothing. Oh look! There's a flying purple pony!! Hi, Mr. Pony!!! Lemme ride you. Mr. Pony takes me to some hill, where a certain blonde sits there waiting for me. I sigh and get off of the pony. Well, actually, I fell off. And landed in strong arms. If it was the real me, I would have blushed, but the dream me only laughs. I sit in his lap, and his hand strokes my face. And then I feel a tongue lick my right cheek, and my eyes open._

"Huh? What happened to the purple flying pony?" I ask dreamily, sitting up. My hand wipes of the spit on my face. "And what licked me?"

"Purple… flying…pony?" Deidara-san asks. He's obviously confused.

"Oh, good morning, Deidara-san, Midori-nee-chan, Tobi-kun." I address each of them by name. "What happened when I was sleeping? Why do you look so confused, Deidara-san?"

"Of course I'm confused, un!!! Aren't you supposed to be dead, un? I checked your pulse and everything, un!!!"

"Huh? She didn't tell you?" It's Midori nee-chan speaking. "She's always been like this!! How long was she out?"

"Um… about two hours, un."

"Odd. She's usually out for only a half-hour to forty-five minutes. If she's out any longer, you have to lick her to get to wake up. Did something, like emotionally traumatizing happen?"

Emotionally… traumatizing…

Automatically, my mind pulls up memories of that… incident, and my face flushes.

"No, not really! Besides the fact that those two just appeared in my closet, then, no, not really!"

"What!!" Midori-nee-chan practically yells. "Appeared in your closet? No wonder! They're characters from Naruto, Aoi-chan!"

"Huh? How come I didn't recognize them, then?"

"They're from Shippuden. You haven't reached that yet. Oh, and talking about Shippuden, here's a gift from Gramps."

She plops a huge bag onto my lap. It looks like it holds at least 20 manga volumes, if not more. I open it, and gasp.

All of the Naruto Shippuden volumes that have come out so far sit in the bag.

"Wow, Gramps didn't have to give me so much… But tell him I love it!!"

"Why don't you just go visit him and tell him?"

"Is the she-devil still there?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Then, I can't go visit him. I hate that woman. I don't ever want to be in the same room as her ever again."

Midori-nee-chan sighs. "I guess I can't convince you, huh."

"You got that right."

Meanwhile, Deidara and Tobi watched/listened, getting confused.

"She can't be _that_ bad, un."

"Oh yea? It's all her fault!!!"

"What's all her fault, Aoi-chan?" Tobi cocks his head innocently.

"Everything!! It's her fault I'm living alone, it's her fault my grandmother is stuck in that sorry excuse of a retirement home, and it's her fault that our-"

Midori Pov

I could tell Aoi-chan was mad. Our two guests had unfortunately decided to broach a taboo subject and she probably wouldn't shut up until she unloaded our entire family history to two [almost] complete strangers. I sigh. I probably shouldn't have asked her to visit Gramps. It's just that he's so_lonely_. I only have time to visit him about once a month, and all the other times, he's stuck alone, in that huge mansion. Well, alone except for _her_. But she doesn't count. I tune back into the rant.

"…that sorry excuse of a retirement home, and it's her fault that our-"I thwack her hard on the back her neck, where the pressure point is. She slumps into a dead faint. I look up at our guest and smile sweetly.

"Sorry, she gets like that. You didn't need to know what she's talking about. Tobi, you're still a good boy."

He had been sulking in an emo corner. Since when were there emo corners in the middle of the dining room? The he popped up, bright and happy after I told him he was a good boy. It's kinda scary to think that this innocent little boy is actually Uchiha Madara. I'm way, way, _way_ ahead of Aoi-chan in Naruto. I read it online, instead of in books. But reading it online hurts Aoi-chan's head. So she's stuck with what we give her.

"When's she gonna wake up, un. I think she's dead again, un." Deidara had two fingers to her wrist.

"Eh. She's always been like that. Hasn't she told you?" They shake their heads. "No? Then I guess I'll have to. Anything that would cause a normal person to faint would make her "dead," so to speak. Also, she is extremely fragile- she "faints" at least twice as easily as the normal human. But then she'll wake up about a half-hour to forty-five minutes later, like I said earlier. If something traumatizing happens, she'll be out for much longer. The longest was about a week- that was the first time she'd been out for more than the norm. She woke up because of our kitty, Dei-dei. He crawled up to her and licked her face, and she woke up. That's how we found out how to wake her up. And that was when we were preparing her body for the funeral. I don't really know how long she'll actually stay out for."

"Dei-dei?" Deidara asks.

"Yeah, Dei-dei. When we got the kitty, it was about the same time as your debut in Naruto. I read the manga chapters online back then, too."

"Where's… Dei-dei now, un?"

"Hmmm… I don't know…" I walk over to the basement door and hear pitiful meowing. "Here he is!!! Dei-dei!!!" Dei-dei was a large, blond-ish cat with blue eyes, and a little flap of fur covering his right eye. I pick him up and show him to Deidara.

"Hey!! Dei-dei looks just like Sempai!!!" Tobi's walking over with hearts in his eyes. "Soooo cute!!!"

"Meh…" Aoi's sleepy voice comes through.

"Mornin', Sleeping Beauty," I say.

"Oh, it's Dei-dei. Where was he?"

"How many times have you locked up poor Dei-dei in the basement?"

"Countless times. Is that where he was? No wonder. I thought he was missing… I'll go feed the poor thing and start making us some dinner."

By now it was about 6:30, and we were all hungry.

"How does cheeseburger macaroni sound?"

"Sure, sure. Remember to make enough for at least 6 people."

"Six?" Deidara asks. "There's only four of us."

"I just get the feeling that we'll have some extra… guests later today."

* * *

-End Chappie-

A/N: Oooh, foreshadowing much?

I seriously have no plot with this, I'm just writing what comes to mind. I only have a kinda-plot.

But on the brighter side, This is quite the long chapter. I'll try to keep all the chapters as long as this one.

Now you kinda know what's wrong with Aoi. I kinda just thought of it in my head, and include it in my chapters…

**Twilight Ninja**: Thanks!! One in for Hidan/Kakuzu

**VampireWolfGirl:** I'm not that stupid as to kill of the main character!!! [Well, actually I am, but, you don't need to know that. Oops, too late.]

**Piper:** Maybe I'll use 'em in a later chapter. Unfortunately, you can't vote twice.

**Meco45: **Yeah, I don't really know how it works, either. I have a sorta idea, but, you ain't gonna know yet. One in for Zetsu!!

Votes so far:

Hidan/Kakazu: 2

Zetsu: 3

Itachi/Kisame: 0

I'll start writing Ch. 6 now. It should be half done by the time this chapter comes out. I'll wait, like, until Thursday morning to finish it. I'll count up all the votes then. So if you haven't voted yet, vote NOW!!! If you want to see how the voting is, check out my profile. It's updated everytime one of you peeps vote.

On another note, on my profile is a poll for who's Midori gonna end up with. I'll keep the poll open for a looooooong time. Vote!!!

* * *

On another note. I'm somewhat banned from the computer for the remainder of the week, unless I be a good girl and clean up my room, practice piano, read books and what-not.

But I'll still be trying my bestest to get on so I can work on the next chapter.

Ja, ne, S1SKA


	6. Dinner and More Guests

Surprise Guests 6

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything! Especially not Naruto!! Or Vocaloids!!! Or their Songs!!! I can only dream… *drools*

**Recap:** _"I just get the feeling that we'll have some extra… guests later today."_

Aoi Pov

"Nee-chan, sixth sense again?" I ask, getting out a couple of pots and pans.

"Yup."

I get out two packages of elbow macaroni while water in the pots boil. The other pan is heating up, and I add some oil.

"Whatcha making, Aoi-chan? Can Tobi help?"

"Tonight's dinner is hamburger macaroni. Tobi, can you help me cut up the onions?"

"Yes Ma'am!!" he salutes. I laugh, he's sooo cute!

We work in a comfortable silence while Midori and Deidara talk.

Midori Pov

"Sixth sense?" Deidara asks.

"Yeah, I get this sort of… nagging feeling in the back of my head every once in a while. It comes in different forms, whether just pictures, or voices, or other stuff. Right now my voice is nagging me about some "extra guest." And my nagging voice is usually correct."

"I wonder who it is…" Deidara voices his thoughts aloud.

"Tobi, I told you to cut the onions, not mince them into some unusable paste!!! Outta my kitchen!!"

Tobi came out really fast, as if he was kicked out. Most likely, he was. I knew about my sister's possessive habits with the kitchen. Tobi bumped into Deidara, who knocked me down onto the floor.

I opened my eyes [which were closed out of reflex], and gasped. Deidara's arms were on either side of my head, but his face was right next to mines. Ours cheeks were almost touching. He was on his elbows, so the tops half of our body was almost touching. There was a heavy weight on my legs, so I couldn't move.

"Tobi…" Deidara was really angry. He kicked Tobi off of him, and then pushed himself off of me. He got up, and offered a hand to me. *How nice* I took his hand and got up.

"You did it again!! Quit bumping into me, un! If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have these kind of accidents, un!"

"Again? Accident_s_?" I ask suspiciously. "Did something like this happen before? Like, maybe with you and Aoi-chan?"

"Uhh… well…" Deidara is fazed. I know, I'm kinda too perspective.

And then a couple knives come whizzing by, almost skimming the tip of Deidara's nose and his ponytail.

"She doesn't need to know, **right, Deidara**?"

Oh. It's her tempt-little-kids-with-candy voice, then switching to her if-you-tell-her-it-won't-just-be-skimming-past-your-nose voice. Okay, she doesn't really have an actual setting of voice for the latter one, but those were the readings I was getting from her voice. I'm psychic, remember?

"Yeah, un." I think he's still in shock. Isn't he supposed to be a ninja? That kind of thing happening shouldn't even faze him.

"I kinda forgot to tell you," I start while she resumes cooking. "But Aoi-chan here has crazy knife skills and is extremely territorial about her kitchen. Just a little heads up. Don't disturb her peaceful kitchen, or you will be punished accordingly."

"Dang right." Aoi says. "On another note, dinner should be ready in about 20 minutes."

"Ah, crud." The 20-minute mark was when the food started smelling so temptingly delicious. Ahhh, I love Aoi-chan's cheeseburger macaroni. "Ah, crud." I say again it again, just for the heck of it. Just the thought of the food made my tummy grumble. I sigh and sit in a chair, slumped over the seat. _Only twenty more minutes_, my mind says.

Deidara sits down across from me. We have a huge dining room table that will probably fit over 20 people if we tried squished in a bit.

I pick up a pencil and start randomly scribbling on the paper tablemat. It's a picture of Dei-dei, who is meowing pitifully for food_. Meow, meow_.

"Aoi! Don't give him any food! His food dish is still full!" _Meow, Meow._

Deidara peeks over and says, "Wow. You're pretty good."

"Thanks." I mutter. I don't bother looking up and continue sketching. Somehow it turns into a scythe. Hmmm… what could this mean?

Tobi sits down next to me and hums a little tune. I pat his head absentmindedly while thinking… And a semi-awkward-comfortable silence settles around us.

Aoi-chan had turned on the CD player and it blasted out her favorite Vocaloid songs, and she was humming along with them, since they were in Japanese.

Pretty soon, dinner was ready. I was really hungry. Aoi brought out the bowls, somehow managing to carry all four, and set them down in front of us. Then she went back to get the forks.

Tobi and Deidara looked at the food as if we put some sort of unknown, foreign food in front of them. Oh wait!! We _did_ put some strange foreign food in front of them! Who wudda thunk that?

Aoi came back with the forks and gave each of us one. She sat down on my other side and said grace for the whole meal. Then she and I began eating away with gusto- hey, we were hungry!!!

Deidara and Tobi watched us, unsure how to use the forks. They slowly copied us.

I glanced at them, and frowned. "Come on! Eat faster!!! This stuff tastes nasty cold!!"

They ate a bit faster, but then we were disturbed with a loud _THUD!_ coming from Aoi's room.

"I think we have some guests, no?" I say, still eating. I don't bother looking up from my food.

"Tobi, go check it out, un."

"Why Tobi?" Aoi asks.

"He's annoying, un."

Tobi skips upstairs like the happy-go-lucky child he is. I can hear some people arguing upstairs.

"Ow!! Kakuzu!! Get the #$%^Y^$# off of me!!!"

"#%^$&^#& would I care. It's your own #$#U& fault that you're under me. Where are we, anyways?"

Tobi chooses now to open the door.

"Hidan-san, Kakuzu-san!! Welcome!!! But, Tobi doesn't know where we are. We're not in any of the Five Great Shinobi Nations, though. Tobi thinks we're in a different dimension. Come downstairs and meet Aoi-chan and Midori-chan!!"

Tobi happily skips back downstairs. I don't think anyone else heard that, but I have enhanced hearing after that… time.

As I guessed, it was Hidan and Kakuzu.

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: yeah, so a whole bunch of random ^%##%&#^ will make up the swearing.

I hope I get their characters right. As a forewarning, some of them might be OOC, but this is me trying to get practice. Let's hope I get better!!!

Don't expect another chapter until around late Sunday or Monday. I'm leaving for a church retreat from Fri-Sun[24-26]

Wow, I'm kinda stupid. I open my email to respond to the reviews, and I find out that I have, like probably 5 more votes for Hidan/Kakuzu. I had ignored it earlier because I thought they were old reviews for previous chapters. SO! sorry guys, no Zetsu. Sigh… this mean's I'll have to rewrite everything. [kay, so it's only like a page. Shuddup]

I think I'm spending too long on just one day. Like, over 6 chapters!!! Don't worry. I don't think the other days should be _that_ long. I think.

Take my poll on my profile to decide who Midori will end up with! I've decided that for every… 5 votes for someone, there will be an "incident" wheeee!!! So Midori might end up very embarrassed. Hahahaha. Vote!!

So tell me how you like it!!! Review!! I live off of reviews!!! And if I die, I can't update!!!

Thanks to SandShinobi00 for the Story alert and Fave.

Wow, I've gotten so many reviews… I'm so pleased and happy!! (^//////^)

**DragonHorseGirl**, **Tikiwiki Girl**, **LOST Fan 4 8 15 16 23 42**, **Kakuzu Lover $1,000,000**, and **Bibs**: So that's 5 in for Hidan/Kakuzu!!

**Piper, VampireWolfGirl**: Thanks for always reviewing!!!

**SandShinobi00**: Sorry, Zetsu won't be in yet. In time, in time.

Anyways, that's all!!! Hope you guys likey the chapter and stay tuned for the next one!!! Mweeheeheehee!!

Ja ne!! ~S1SKA


	7. Knives

Surprise Guests 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream…*drools*

Recap: _As I guessed, it was Hidan and Kakuzu_.

* * *

Midori POV

I could tell that Aoi was definitely surprised, even with the forewarning I gave her. I mean, who wouldn't be? Even more people just appeared in her closet. It doesn't help that they're swearing left and right or the fact that Kakuzu is DANG scary.

"Where the #&^Y%$ were you, Deidara? You were gone for three &*%#^&* weeks!" That outburst came from Hidan.

"Are you kidding me? I've been here for less than half a day, un!"

"I guess time travels differently in the different worlds." I say my thoughts aloud.

"Hey, Dei, who's the chicks?"

"This is Aoi," points, "and Midori, un." Points again.

"Hey," I say, shoving my finger into his face. "It's not polite to point!!"

"Dude, sis, that again?"

"Yups! Oh, and I forgot, this is Hidan, an immortal Jashinist," I say, pointing to Hidan, "And Kakuzu, a greedy old miser with… five, was it? hearts." I point to Kakuzu.

"How do you know our names? $^%&^*^$%!!"

"In this world, we're all part of a popular manga. Almost everyone knows us, un."

"Except for my sister," I say. "She's waaaaay behind. Anyways, grab a seat and Aoi will get you guys some food."

"What! Why me?"

"Because you're the one with experience as a waitress. You need practice anyways. You have to go back to work tomorrow."

"Ah, darn. I forgot. Work! Tomorrow!!! Gahhh!!!"

"Yeah, yeah, hurry up and get us some food." I say. "Get me an extra-big portion."

She glares at me, and I stick my tongue out at her.

I turn back to the table as she re-heats the macaroni.

"Hidan-san, Kakuzu-san, sit down. There's space over there, next to Deidara-san, or next to Aoi-chan or Tobi."

They sat down, next to Deidara. "So anyways," I begin, "You're all part of a very popular manga, called Naruto."

"#$^&&%^( %#%^&)?! Why are named after that %$&&%^$ Kyuubi?"

"Naruto's the main character." I state matter-of-fact-edly

"Why %#^&* aren't we the main character? We're #$%?#% cooler! %&!"

And then, knives come whizzing out of the kitchen again, pinning Hidan against the wall. I carefully back up against the opposite wall as to not get hit. [In case you're wondering, there's a cutout in the kitchen/dining room wall] Tobi, Deidara and Kakuzu join me.

"DON'T SWEAR IN THIS HOUSE!!!" Aoi yells.

Hidan pulls the knives off of his clothes chucks them back, yelling, "I'll %#*&# swear if I $%&# want to swear, %*#^$%#!!!"

I sigh. "He did not just say that."

"He did, un."

"Ah, great."

Even more knives come out of the kitchen, at an even faster pace. I look at the growing amount of knives in the wall and on the floor, sighing.

"Hey, Aoi-chan!"

"Yeah?" She stops throwing the knives.

"Since when did we have so many knives?"

"I dunno, yesterday? I got a huge package in the mail holding a heck lot of nice knives. There must've been at least $2,000 worth of knives in there!! I was soooo happy!!!"

"Hey, who was it from?"

"…"

"Aoi?"

"… I dunno…"

"Whatever. You're cleaning them up."

I look back at Hidan, who doesn't have a single scratch on him. As he pulls out all the knives again, he yells, "HAHA, %&$&$!!! YOU DIDN'T GET ME!!!"

"I didn't want to. Blood is hard to clean up."

"You say that as if you had to clean up blood before, un."

"…" She just chucks another knife at Hidan, hitting him square in the forehead.

"OWWW, $&$^*%#$%!!! What the &%#^* was that for, &$Q#%^*!!!"

"To show you I missed on purpose. Hey, Midori, he _is_ immortal, right?"

"Shouldn't you have asked him that _before_ you stuck a knife to his head? But anyways, most mortal people wouldn't be yelling obscene profanities with a knife still in their head."

It was a pretty funny sight, though. Hidan kinda looked like a unicorn with that knife sticking out of his head. He finally took it out and threw it at Aoi. She dodged it, and chucked another barrage of knives at Hidan.

"Hey, can you stop? I think the food's done."

"Mmkay." I hear the dishes clatter as she gets out more bowls and stuff. I move back to my seat, the others following my example. The knives on my seat I dumped to another chair.

Aoi came out with all the food, an extra-big bowl for me. What can I say? I love her cooking. I start eating as soon as the bowl was placed in front of me. I see Hidan and Kakuzu looking at their food warily.

"C'mon, eat!! This is good food going to waste!! And wasted food _wastes money_!" I purposely emphasize the last part. At least Kakuzu would eat, and he does, but not without removing his mask first. Hidan unsurely follows his partner's example and starts eating. Both are really clumsy with the forks.

"Hey, this food is pretty good, *#^%&!!"

Aoi glares at him and sticks her fork into his eye. "Don't call me that."

"OW!!! I'll %$&#$^7 call you whatever I ^#&$* want to call you, okay, %&#%^!?"

She responds by sticking her fork into his other eye.

"What's your *#&#%^%^ problem, #$^*#%^?! That %&$% hurts!!"

"Don't swear," Aoi-chan says, heading into the kitchen. She picks up all of the knives on her way in.

"Hey, How'd you manage to hold all the knives, anyways?"

"Skill and concentra- ow!" I hear the noise of knives being dropped and dumped into the sink.

"Dang, it's bleeding. A lot."

I come over and see that she has a cut on her arm. It was bleeding quite a lot for its size.

"You idiot. Here, let me get that for you."

* * *

Deidara POV-because I thought it would be interesting.

I head over to the kitchen, because I was worri- no wait, what was I thinking? I'm just curious. Yes, that's right, just curious.

"You idiot. Here, let me get that for you." Midori says.

I look over and see-

Midori is licking Aoi-san's arm!!!

* * *

--End Chappie—

A/N: I'm back? Didja miss me? I had a lot of fun, and stayed up past 1 am each night. Sorry I didn't finish this yesterday, I was kinda… distracted.

I dunno, I just thought this would be a good place to leave off. Deidara's worried? About who? Dundundun…

It's not what you think, but think what you like. It will be cleared up in the next chapter, it's all part of my plot.

**Aoi:** you have a plot! No way!!

**Me:** Of course I have a plot!!! I just don't write whatever comes to mind!!

**Aoi**: Yes you do.

**Me:** Fine, I do. Whatever!!

* * *

**Review!!! I live off of reviews!!! And if I'm dead, I can't update!!**

**VampireWolfGirl:** Luckily for you, I was checking my email to respond to reviews and I find out that Hidan and Kakuzu have, like 5 more votes. They won!!

SakuraDreams92: Thanks!! Well, now you know!! Bum bum bum indeed…

**Funky Bracelet Chick**: Thanks!! How did you know that I love cookies!! *eats cookie*

**Sandshinobi00**: Sorry, but Zetsu's next in line!!

**Kira-seven**: Gomen, Sorry, etc! you voted too late!! But they will come in after Zetsu. *hint, hint, nudge, nudge, cough, cough, poke, poke,*- **Aoi**: Enough already!!

Meh.

* * *

I'm thinking I'll need a new [girl] character in this fanfic soon[but not too soon]- how about a contest?

Guess my favorite… SONG!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!! If you've read my story, there is a hint- but you'll have to find it! Good luck!! I doubt very many of you will know it, though. I have weird taste in music. BUT!!! I have more than one favorite song, so, if you guess anyone of them, it counts. There's probably like ten of them or so. Good luck[again!]!

**_WE HAVE A WINNER!! Check out my profile to see the lucky winner!! WHEEE!!!_**

* * *

Also, please participate in my poll. I'll give you a cookie? I don't know who to pair up Midori with… anyone?

Ja ne, ~S1SKA.


	8. Hidan the Unicorn

Surprise Guests 8

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _I look over and see-_

_Midori is licking Aoi-san's arm!!! _

* * *

Dei POV

By now, everyone else had joined me.

"Hey, %*%#! What's wrong with your sister?" I hear Kakuzu sighing. Hidan can be so insensitive sometimes.

"What do you mean, what's wrong?" Aoi asks.

"Why is she drinking your blood?" Kakuzu asks another question instead of answering are, eryone else had joined me.

"Because there's no towels. And she just likes blood." She says it so smoothly, as if stating "the sky is blue." This either happened often or she's just really good at lying.

"Likes blood?"

"Nee-chan here has… a slightly different diet, ever since that time… Nee-chan, I'll go prep the meat, mmkay? You should just tell me if you're hungry."

"I would have, but, we just happened to have surprise guests." she gestures towards us. "Now, shoo. Go back and eat your dinner." We reluctantly "shooed" and went back to our seats. I could hear Aoi-san getting out some food.

"What do you think is wrong with that &#$%^&?" Hidan rudely asks. A knife comes out and hits Hidan's forehead again.

"Don't call any of us that!!!" Aoi-san yells loudly.

Aoi-san comes out, but Midori-san stays in the kitchen.

"Dudes, quit staring at me. It's not like I grew and extra eye or anything. Nee-chan's gonna be fine. She's just hungry. Hidan, you look like a unicorn."

"You threw the knife #&$^& hard, and I can't &$%& get it out, ^$*#$^!!!" It was true. Hidan, no matter how hard he tried, could not get the knife out of his head. I stifled a laugh with my hand.

"Here, let me try." Aoi walks over and pulls the knife out with ease. She wipes the blood off with a towel.

"What the #$&#&%$?" Hidan rubs his head.

"Are you sure you're supposed to be S-ranked criminals? Can't even get a knife outta your head. And yet a fourteen-year-old girl gets it out with ease. Hmm, hmm, hmm, I wonder."

Hidan gets super angry. You could practically see the veins on his forehead bulging, and his mouth was twitching.

"You #%&*#/? %& %& *#% ^&!&#!!!!" He grabs Aoi's neck and pushes her to the wall, strangling her.

"Dang it!! Again!! What's wrong with my luck…" She's out like a dead weight and her head rolls over. Hidan lets her down, but she's still out.

Midori comes out, wiping her mouth with a napkin. "Wow, again?" she seems only slightly surprised. "You must not have alota patience." She says, pointing to Hidan.

Hidan seems surprised at Midori's lack of caring, as well as how fragile Aoi was. Tobi **[A/N: who I have conveniently ignored for the past few chapters. Sorry, Tobi!!]**, was crying and wailing over Aoi-san's limp body. He seems to have forgotten what happened earlier today.

Kakuzu is still eating, but says to Hidan, "You killed her!! I better not have to pay any fees for this."

"Actually, there's usually a huge fine and a lot of jail time for murder around here." Midori says.

"Hiiiiiiiiidaaaaaaan!!!!" Kakuzu's eyes are practically glowing. His threads come out and start to strangle Hidan. Midori laughs. She's clearly enjoying this.

Tobi stops wailing and checks Aoi's wrist for a pulse. "She's really dead!!! A heck lot of water comes out of his eyehole. "Wahhhh!!! Aoi-chan!!! Tobi's really sorry for being so stupid!!! Please don't die!!!Tobi's really sorry for making you kiss sempai!!"

Midori points at me. "A-HA!!! So that's what happened!!! I knew something happened between you two!!"

Hidan comes over, smiling, and slaps my back. Hard. "You %&#% womanizer!! You disappear for three weeks when you're supposed to be finding the three-tailed beast, and you're being a complete playboy and fooling around with #^%*#$^s."

"I wasn't fooling around, un! It's all Tobi's fault, un!"

"SHUT UP!! THE PURPLE FLYING PONIES LEFT ME AGAIN!!!"

We all look over to Aoi-san, who turned around and stabbed Hidan with a knife.

"Why'd ya stab me, ^&*$#6!"

"Because you're immortal."

"Where'd you get that knife anyways? You put all of them in the sink." Midori asks.

"That's a good question… Oh!! The purple flying ponies gave it to me!!"

"There's no such thing as purple flying ponies!!! BAKA!!!" Midori whaps Aoi on the head.

"OW!!" Aoi, in turn, knifes Hidan again.

"$Q$^$%&!!! YOU #*%#% *%^#!^!! Why'd you stab me again?!

"Because if I stabbed my sister, I'd go to jail. But you're immortal, so it doesn't matter."

"#&#$%" Hidan's resorted to muttering now.

Tobi takes this time to glomp Aoi. "Aoi-chan!! Tobi's so glad you're alive!! Tobi didn't know what would happen if you died!! Tobi's sorry that he told everyone!!!"

"Told everyone! What did you tell them, Tobi!?" An almost visible dark aura came out of her.

"Uh…" Tobi was freaking out. In a much smaller voice, he whimpered, "That you kissed sempai."

"TOOOOOOBIIIIII!!!!"

"Tobi's sorry!"

"TOBI, BAD BOY!!!" she starts whapping him on the head with a baseball bat.

"Aoi-chan!" Midori says.

"Huh, what?" She looks up from beating Tobi.

"Where'd you get that bat, anyways?"

"My pocket." I looked, and the biggest pocket she had was her sweatshirt pocket.

"How'd you fit it in there?"

"With the help of the purple flying ponies' magic."

"WAIT JUST A %&*#^* MINUTE!!!" Hidan turns and points a painted finger at Aoi. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU, #%&(^#$^!?"

"I've always been like this. Don't know how, don't know why. Pretty interesting, if you ask me. I could play dead fairly well. I don't seem to have a pulse at all."

"More accurately," Midori-san corrected, "Her pulse is too quick to be caught even with fancy-schmancy machinery."

"And as a conclusion, I'm special!!!" Aoi-san waves her arms proudly. "Now go finish your dinner. It's all cold by now. EAT!!!"

"Yes, mother," Midori said.

"Talking about mother, where's your parents, un." I was curious. "I haven't seen them the whole time I've been here, and you don't seem old enough to be living on your own, un."

"Tobi wants to meet Aoi-chan and Midori-chan's parents too!"

The atmosphere around Aoi-san thickened.

"Uh-oh." Midori said. "You shouldn't have just asked that."

* * *

--End Chappie—

A/N: I have overcome the slight writer's block from which I have been suffering from!! I almost didn't get that last sentence. I finished!!!

This chapter's a grand total of 1,008 words. YESH!!!

And Sakura-chan, your character will come… soon…

Yeah, if you already didn't know, my contest has ended already!!! Check out mah profile for more info.

Anything else I want to say? Not really.

Review!! I live off of reviews!! Thanks so much to all my purty reviewers!!!

Ummmm anything else?

Yah, that's it.

Ja ne, ~S1ssy-chan


	9. Morning Surprise

Surprise Guests 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _The atmosphere around Aoi-san thickened._

"_Uh-oh." Midori said. "You shouldn't have just asked that."_

* * *

--Still Dei POV--

"My parents," Aoi started, "are dead, all because of that she-devil who-"Midori whaps her sister's pressure point with her elbow, knocking her out cold.

"Yeah, they're dead." Midori said. "But if I let her continue, she'll unload our entire family history on you guys, and you reeealy don't want to know that right now. Maybe later. Now, onto more important stuff, how shall we do the sleeping arrangements? There are three bedrooms: the master, the guest, and Aoi's room. I'll stay with Aoi. The master bedroom has two twin-size beds, and the guest only has one queen. How shall we do this?"

"I think we'll room with our partners." Kakuzu said.

"But, who's gonna take the guest room? There's only one bed!"

"I guess I will, un. Tobi can have the floor."

"Sempai's so mean to Tobi!" Tobi said, crying.

"Shhh, shhh, it's okay, Tobi. I _think_ we have some futons or something like that in the attic room." Midori said, patting his head.

"So this #^*%# is really out like a light." Hidan said, nudging Aoi with his foot. Her hand came out and punched his shin, and she rolled over, mumbling about purple flying ponies.

"Stupid %*#$#^*%#" Hidan muttered, rubbing his shin.

Ignoring Hidan, Midori said, "Do you guys need, like pajamas or something? There should be some in the attic." We all said "sure," and she headed upstairs.

* * *

---Midori POV---

Upstairs in the attic, I found a whole bunch of clothes that Gramps gave us but we never used. They were too big, they were men's clothes, for Pete's sake! I think it should fit them. There weren't enough sweats for all of them to wear sweats, so some of them would have to make do with shorts. I hoped it would fit them. If not- then, well, too bad for them. I head back downstairs.

"Will these do?" I ask, holding them up so they could see it. I threw them on the floor, saying, "Choose what you want. But wait until me and Aoi get out of the room before you start stripping."

With that, I dragged my sister out of the room and into hers. I plopped her onto her bed and headed back upstairs, to drag a futon into the guest room. I went back to the attic and dropped off a pillow and some blankets. Then I went back to my [our] room. Aoi was awake by now.

"Dang, four times today. I've got some bad luck." She said, heading towards the drawers. She pulled out two t-shirt dresses [they went to the knees] and two shorts. She tossed one set to me and started changing. I turned around and locked the door before changing as well. Then I went outside.

"Are you done changing yet?" I yelled.

"Yeah, un. What do we do with our other clothes?"

"I dunno. Here, I'll show you to your rooms." I lead them upstairs. "To your right is the master bedroom. I've already put some bedding for you, Tobi. To the left is Aoi's room. The door next to it leads to the upstairs, where the attic and guest room is. There's a bathroom right in front of us as well as one upstairs and in the master bedroom. Okay? Now go!"

I head back to my room and fall on the bed. Aoi's already asleep. I turn off the lights and get into bed, and drift into sleep…

* * *

--Aoi POV, because her dreams are funny--

_I look around. My dream self is once again riding the purple flying ponies. I laugh, enjoying the ride. But there are to harnesses or bridles or anything of the sort that you can hold on to. The dream me clumsily lets go of the pony's mane, and I fall. I must have a habit of falling or something. _

_I end up in a dark room, and the floor is covered in liquid. But, this place seems familiar- from where? I think, but nothing comes to mind. I look down at the floor and I realize that the floor is covered in blood. I'm about to scream, but someone covers my mouth. It's a very pale hand. I want to scream, but I can't. I turn around, and see- _

_Well, actually I can't see anything. The shadows cover his face. But something about him screams pedophile. A snake slithers across the floor. Then what was one snake became hundreds. __**Now**__ I scream._

I wake up, drenched in sweat. It's morning- about 7:00. Time to make breakfast. But what was that dream about? I shrug it off, changing into a t-shirt, sweatshirt, and jeans. After I finish brushing my teeth and stuff, I head downstairs. Today's breakfast will be pancakes, I decide. Hmmmm… I should wake everybody up… after I make the pancake batter. Eggs, milk, sugar, flour, baking soda, salt and butter. Now that the batter's done, I head upstairs.

I guess Hidan will be first. They sleep the furthest. If I wake up Hidan, he'll probably be loud enough to wake Kakuzu as well. Two birds with one stone, right?

I knock on the door. Hafta make sure nobody's like, changing or whatever. Guess not. I got a bucket from the attic, then decided against it. It'll be a pain to clean up. Luckily I have my knives with me. I get in front of Hidan, and poke his forehead. Poke, poke. No response. Are ninjas supposed to be such deep sleepers? I poke him harder. POKE, POKE. He stirs, and then his arm comes out and somehow manages to pull me on the bed next to him. I say somehow because I was kneeling next his bed.

I feel my face heat up, he even put his arm around my waist! That little… I pull out my knife and stab him in the chest. His eyes open, and he pushes me off the bed.

"WHAT THE %$*$, %&*$#~!!!" Wait a minute- is that? No, it can't be, but it is!! He's-

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: What's wrong with him?!?! )OoO(

It's only a minor cliffy.

It seems like I always end all my chapters like that. To all my faithful readers: I have updated!

1,010 words!!! Longer than the last one!!! Wheee!!

Hmmm what else?

Check out my blog!!! It's called MAH BLOG OF DOOM!!!

http:// s1ska. blog spot[dot]com

^remove the spaces, and replace [dot] with a . . I update this daily. you get a heads up about how my story[s] are going along.

Although it's only filled with random ramblings for now, I'll later fill it with random bits and pieces of my life.

Review!! I live off of reviews!!

Uhmmm anything else?

If you've noticed that I took Itachi off my Midori poll, it's because SakuraDreamer-chan requested him for her OC. When she comes in.

Hmmm… I think both sisters shall be open game… [sounds kinda weird]

And so there shall be an Aoi poll too!!

**_BUT!!!! _**The Aoi poll is only on my blog. So if you want someone to be paired with Aoi, go to MAH BLOG OF DOOM and vote!!! Thanks!!! ^^

Ja ne!! ~S1ssy-chan


	10. Hidan, Ground Rules, and Work

Surprise Guests 10 – The big one-oh! Yea!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!! I can only dream… drools*

Recap: _I feel my face heat up, he even put his arm around my waist! That little… I pull out my knife and stab him in the chest. His eyes open, and he pushes me off the bed. _

"_WHAT THE %$*$, %&*$#~!!!" Wait a minute- is that? No, it can't be, but it is!! He's-_

* * *

--Still Aoi POV—

He's blushing!!! I honestly didn't think he'd be the type to blush like that! I laugh a bit, my own face still a bit red. But why is he blushing? Hmmm…

"Anyways, get ready for breakfast. We're having pancakes." I turn around to the other bed and poke Kakuzu, who still doesn't wake up. Darn. So much for my two birds with one stone theory. Midori-nee-chan did say he was greedy… but is he that greedy? Only one way to find out!

I get out my wallet and wave some money in front of his face. His eyes snap open, but I put away my cash before he takes it. "Breakfast should be ready in ten." What a miser.

I get off of my knees and head downstairs. Midori's brushing her teeth: she'd always been a light sleeper. I stick my head in the bathroom and say, "Breakfast in ten." She nods drowsily.

Next is Deidara and Tobi. I know!! I go downstairs and grab Dei-dei, who downstairs meowing for food. I open their door and pop the cat in. He's the type that will jump anything that moves when he's hungry. I hear a "oof" and say, "Breakfast in ten."

Downstairs, I pour food into Dei-dei's food bowl and wash my hands. I turn on the stove and put a pan on. While I wait for the pan to heat up, I set up the table. Three people on each side. When I'm done, I add butter to the pan and pour the batter. While it's cooking, I hear somebody come downstairs.

"Morning, Aoi-chan." It's my sister.

"Mornin', Nee-chan. You want your pancakes first?"

"Yes please." By now the first couple of pancakes were done. While the next batch cooked, I brought over Nee-chan's pancakes, as well as some syrup, powdered sugar, and fruit. I flipped the pancakes, and then brought over some juice and milk. Next was a new batch of pancakes, and I brought over some cups. Flip the pancakes, pop in some toast. Crack the eggs, remove pancakes and pour batter. Stir the eggs, get the toast, pop some more in, flip the pancakes and etc.

I continued until there was enough for ten people, I still didn't know how much our guests could eat. I brought out the plates, and set them on the table. By now, the rest of our guests have joined us, and were watching me.

"Go on, eat!" I ate my share quickly. I think they're more used to the utensils, as they eat faster today than they did yesterday.

"Nee-chan, we're gonna have to go to the store at this rate. They're eating all our food!!"

She sighs. "You're right. Ask Hikari-chan if you can go after work."

Hikari-chan's my sempai at work. She also helps carpool me to and from work.

Oh yeah, work!! I had work today, it's Tuesday. I don't have work on Wednesday, and Sunday to Monday. Although I worked on Saturdays, I still had the mornings free.

"This is good, un."

"Hm..? Thanks." I finish three pancakes before cleaning up my plate. I plop my plate next to the sink and wince- the sink was full!! I sighed, rolling up my sleeves and pulling out a sponge. Time to get to work. It didn't help that all my sister and our guests did was put their plates next to the sink.

By the time I was done, it was almost 9. All of our guests sat across from my sister. I sat down next to her, wondering what she would talk to them about.

"Okay, ground rules. You break them, you pay.

"1. No killing anyone, or each other. Actually, don't even injure each other.

"2. Stay out of our room. No exceptions.

"3. Hidan, don't do any of your rituals indoors, or else you're cleaning it up.

"4. Deidara, no explosions. Your art will have to wait.

"5. Don't destroy the house.

"6. Don't swear, Hidan."

"I'll swear if I %&#! want to swear, okay, $&^$%!?" Odd, he's a bit quieter than the norm. I can tell this does not go unnoticed by Midori, who raises her eyebrows.

"That wasn't why I said it-" I had already knifed his forehead again. What can I say? I really disliked swearing.

Nee-chan sighed. "I said that last one for your sake. Baka."

I had started drawing on the paper tablemats. I definitely wasn't as good as my sister. What I wanted to be a cat looked more like a pig. I sigh and resort to drawing stick figures.

When it's around 11, a car honks outside. It's Hikari-chan! "Bye, Nee-chan!"

"Buh-bye." She says.

Hikari-chan is my role model. She's so pretty and strong. I wanted to get my hair cut and dyed like hers: black chin-length hair with blue highlights, but my sister decided against it.

During the drive to work, I ask, "Can we stop by WinCo later? We've got some surprise guests and they've eaten all my food."

"Sure!"

Hikari-chan and I work at Cos-Café. It's short for Cosplay Café. It's fun to work at, except for the occasional pervs. But our boss takes care of that. He hires both guys and girls. One part of the guy's jobs are to take care of the pervs.

The cosplay theme changes every month. When we walk in, we find out it's Naruto!! Boss goes overboard, getting murals and such hanging on all the walls, as well as all sorts of otaku goodies on the shelves.

I sigh a content sigh. I love Naruto, even if I am behind. I only managed to read the first Shippuden yesterday. Boss tells me that I'm cosplaying as Hinata, Shippuden. He hands me a costume and a file.

Here at Cos-Café, we specialize and take pride in making your visit as real as possible. That means, if the one cosplaying as Naruto comes by, I have to suddenly get all shy and blush. People say it's as if you're actually in whatever manga/anime the theme is, and the characters are serving them. Because that is our specialty!!

Enough infomercial. The file Boss hands me has all the character quirks about Hinata and stuff I should remember. I change, even putting in some contacts that make my deep blue eyes into a pale lavender. I don't really want to know how much money Boss spends.

I walk out of the changing room and find out that Hikari-chan is cosplaying as an Akatsuki, but I don't recognize her. All I recognize is the cloak. The inner me cries, wanting to be updated on Naruto.

"Who are you?" I ask.

"Konan. Lone girl of the Akatsuki."

"Ooooh."

And so, our day goes by as normal.

* * *

--Meanwhile, back at home, Midori POV--

After Aoi leaves, I bring Hidan to the backyard.

"This is where you can do all your rituals and stuff."

We have a pretty big backyard, and a nice range of trees and bushes.

"But don't mess up the garden." In the corner is our garden, with little rows of veggies like tomatoes and carrots. I turn around to face him, my arms crossed and eyebrows raised. Interrogation style.

"You've been awfully quiet, Hidan-san. Did something happen between you and my sister?" By the shock crossing his face, I could tell that something had. Ahh… my poor sister, having such bad luck with guys. Incidents after incidents occur.

* * *

--Hidan POV--

"Did something happen between you and my sister?" Aww, $%&(%$#!)!!! How did she know? I frowned, trying to think of some logical explanation.

I remember waking up because something stabbed me in the chest. [now into flashback mode- it's how Hidan works!! jk]

I opened my eyes and saw Aoi in my arms. Wait a minute- Aoi in my arms? "WHAT THE %$*$, %&*$#~!!!" I push her off the bed. Why was she on the bed? With me? I feel my face flush slightly, and I see her laughing. If it's possible I blush even more- but she doesn't seem to notice, thank Jashin-sama.

"Anyways, get ready for breakfast. We're having pancakes." And then she gets up to bother Kakuzu.

I take this time to think. Since when did I blush when anything happened, let alone a girl laughing! It couldn't be- I'm sorry Jashin-sama!!!

Apparently I took too long to think, because when I looked up, I saw that she had left already.

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: Ha!! My first eva no cliffy-ish ending!!! Seriously, if you look at all of my previous stories, it always ends with a cliffy-ish of some sort. I think.

Oooooh Hidan, you bad, bad boy. (.") Apparently he takes too long to think. Maybe Aoi attacking his forehead [and his brain!] is starting to affect him…

I wish there actually was a Cos-Café. It sounds pretty dang fun to work at… But I just came up with that idea off the top of my head. But it's based on maid Cafes.

Anyways, this chapter comes up to a grand total of 1,409 words. An epic milestone!!!

**SakuraDreamer**'s OC is introduced in this chapter!!! Wheee!!! Did I do okay, Sakura-chan?

Check out mah blog and vote in mah poll- the AOI poll.

Hidan- 1

Others-0

Hmmm what other random nonsense should I blab about?

This typed up July 30th, 2009.

Review!! I live off of Reviews!! [and microwave food, but who cares?]

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan.


	11. Food and Shopping

Surprise Guests Ch. 11

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I can only dream…*drools*

Recap: _Apparently I took too long to think, because when I looked up, I saw that she had left already._

--THIS IS THE SUCKEH CHAPTER OF DOOM!!!--

* * *

--anyways, Midori POV--

Ahhh who knew Hidan had _feelings_!! For my sister, nonetheless!! Hah, what a comedy.

He took too long to answer, so I left him and went inside. I got all the info I wanted so far.

"Where's Hidan, un?"

"Outside, thinking. I guessed the question I asked him was too hard to comprehend."

"What did you ask him, un?"

"If something happened between him and my sister."

Deidara frowned. "What did he say?" Oooh… is he jealous? How cute!

"He didn't say anything. But it's kinda obvious that something happened. He took too long to think of and excuse so I left him outside. He's probably doing an "I'm sorry, Jashin-sama" ritual by now."

He looked outside, and indeed, there was a ritual circle with Hidan in the middle.

* * *

--With Aoi--

I was working at my job peacefully. You had to cook for your customers here at Cos-Café. So here I was, cooking some omurice. Cooking, cooking… Oh crud.

I forgot to prepare lunch!! Ah, great. I hope one of our guests can actually cook.

_Good luck, guys!!!_

* * *

--Back at home, Midori POV—

Soon, my tummy started growling, but I wasn't the only one. I go over to the fridge, hoping Aoi-chan remembered to prepare lunch.

Of course she didn't. Ah, great. By now the others were crowding around the kitchen, looking for food. Stomachs were growling.

"Eheheheh…" I say nervously, rubbing the back of my head. "Aoi-chan forgot to make lunch…" My stomach growled again at the mention of lunch. "And… I can't cook to save my life. Can any of you guys cook?"

They started looking at each other, probably willing one of the other people to speak.

"Don't you have instant ramen?" Kakuzu asks. His stomach growled.

"I guess, but-" I'm rudely cut off by a hungry Hidan.

"Then just $^*# make some ^(&#^$ ramen!!"

"But!" Nobody listens to me and they sit down in the dining room. I sigh and get out the ramen packets.

I turn away for a second to get myself a cup of milk, but then the pot explodes.

"WHAT THE #$^*$# #%^#!!??" Hidan yells.

"Cool, un."

"Deidara-san, even though I semi-agree with you on the whole "Art is a Bang" thing, I have to say: Not in the kitchen, Deidara-san, not in the kitchen."

"Great. What are we #$%^& gonna eat now." Hidan whined. Gosh, he's like a little kid!

"Well, I tried telling you I make instant ramen explode, but you didn't listen. Now are you sure none of you can cook?" I look around them.

"I can." It's Kakuzu. He glares at me for the funny look I give him. "What? Cooking your own food saves money." He moves towards the kitchen and I sit down next to Tobi.

Again I start randomly sketching on the tablemats. This time it turns into a potted venus flytrap.

"Hey, wasn't last time when you drew that scythe, Hidan and Kakuzu appeared, un? Do you think it means that Zetsu's gonna come, un?"

"Hmm… Maybe you're right." How come I never noticed that?

"I should call Aoi and tell her to by some meat, then."

"How do you plan to tell her? She's far away by now!!"

"With my phone. I forgot, you people don't have phones." I whip out my cell phone and send her a text. *Com home b4 u go off, have Hi-chan bring her truck. We'll com w/ u- 2 much stuff 2 buy* SEND.

"Okay, she'll get that text and will stop by here. I need like two of you to come with us. There'll be alotta stuff to buy. Umm… Deidara… and Hidan. You two are less inconspicuous."

"But Tobi wants to come!!"

"Only if you take off your mask, it's too noticeable."

Deidara and the others peer over curiously. I guess they've never seen his face. I guess Madara wouldn't want it to be known who he was… Even eating, he practically inhaled all the food super fast before you could see his face.

"Awww can Tobi really not go?"

"The keyword is inconspicuous. Your swirly orange mask is definitely noticeable. That, and over a million people know what you guys look like."

"Awww… Tobi's sad."

Kakuzu comes out with some onigiri. I grab some and eat it- it's good.

"Thanks, Kakuzu! This is delicious!!"

"Hmph."

"So anyways, after lunch, I'll get you guys some new clothes. I think they should fit…"

I finished lunch and went upstairs to the guest room, where one of our cousins had left a whole bunch of his clothes.

I grab two pairs of jeans and two t-shirts. A skeleton t-shirt for Hidan and a t-shirt that look like a tux for Deidara. And then some jeans.

I bring them downstairs. "See if these fit," I say, heading back upstairs. I myself change into a panda t-shirt, and a pair of black jeans. I head back downstairs.

Hidan and Deidara had finished changing, and I saw that the clothes fit really well. But their hairstyles still stood out…

"Deidara-san, come here."

"Hmm?"

"Your hair. It's too noticeable. You'll have to get it out of the ponytail."

"What? Why? It's artistic, un!"

"You look kinda gay."

I could see his mouth twitching. "Fine." He undid his ponytail, and the hair came tumbling down.

"Geez. How come a guy like you has such nice silky hair?" I ask while pulling his hair up. I was gonna fix it for him so it wasn't so conspicuous. I pulled it all into a loose ponytail. And then into pigtails. And then a bun. And then braided. And then Deidara snapped and put it back into the loose ponytail. Hmph. Meanie.

"Oh, and Deidara, put these on." I held out a pair of black fingerless gloves. "Mouths on your hands aren't exactly considered as normal here."

"Hidan, watch your potty mouth. You're gonna get us kicked outta the store." Hidan looked pretty much fine, but, his hair. Hmmm… still too Hidan-like. I drag him to the sink and wash off the gel… or whatever he used to slick back his hair, ignoring his loud protests. His bangs stayed down, and now, you wouldn't be able to tell it was Hidan unless you looked closely.

"There." I stand back, admiring my handiwork. They could pass off as normal teens, "cousins," staying over at my house for a while. Now we wait for Aoi-chan to come back home.

About a half-hour later, Aoi-chan comes home, and I open the door for her. "Are you sure we can bring them" Then she sees the two. "Woah! Nice job, Midori-chan!"

Then we all head outside, where Hikari-chan is waiting with her truck. I run up and take the front seat and lock the door, sticking my tongue out at her. I know this will prove to be interesting.

* * *

--Aoi POV--

That Midori… She purposely took the front seat, forcing me to sit in the back with the other two. Does she know that something happened between me and Hidan? I mean, he was quieter this morning… guess not!!! I opened the door, but Hidan's already sitting on the other side, forcing me to sit in the middle… Talk about awkward. I wish there was a wall to bang my head against…

Deidara sits on my other side, closing the door. Both of them seem quite nervous. Hikari starts the car, startling them. I put on my seatbelt and both of them copy me.

"So, Aoi-chan," Hikari says. "Who're these two?"

I freeze- how should I answer her? Should I tell her the truth, or should I say that they're cousins? It should be okay to tell her, because she's also a fellow otaku, and she can keep secrets pretty well. "They're-"

I'm cut off by Midori saying, "They're our surprise guests. Hidan and Deidara, from the Naruto world. How they came here we have no idea." I guess Midori-chan decided to trust her.

"So who else is here?" I almost forgot that she's a Itachi fangirl. I bet meeting him in real life would be her lifetime goal.

"Besides these two, there's Kakuzu and Tobi," Midori said. I swear, I saw her face drop a little. It takes a bit longer then the norm to get to WinCo. When we get there, Hidan and Deidara stare openly at the store. "Just think of it as all the village's stores in one."

Inside, we split up into two groups: Hikari, me, and Hidan, and Midori and Deidara. My group gets the raw stuff. Midori's group gets the already prepared stuff.

I have Hidan get over 10 pounds of meat while Hikari and I pick some fruits and veggies. We load them all into the cart and pay. Then Hidan and Hikari go put it in the trunk while I get other ingredients, like spices, flour, sugar, and pasta.

"Is that really you, Aoi-chan?" a male voice asks. Uh-oh. It can't be. I turn around and see-

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: 1,505 words.

I'm back with mah cliffies of doom!!! It took a bit longer than normal to get this chapter out…

Anyways, this one was fun to do…

I'm probably still in a good mood from that drawing yesterday. You can check it out on my DA- the link's on mah profile. Haha, I think it's hilarious!!

You can check it out on my blog, too.

I'll update my blog with how far my story's coming along. I also will post some spoilers here and there.

Make sure to go vote for who you want Midori and Aoi to end up with!!! Their fate is in your hands!!! Midori poll available on my profile, Aoi poll's on mah blog. 4th to the top on the right-hand side. I think.

Tobi's winning the Midori poll. Funny, because I never really thought about having the two together… but I guess it could happen. Madara still has not made an entrance!! There's only Tobi…

Hidan is winning the Aoi poll by one vote!! That means Deidara can win easily as well.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter!!!

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan


	12. Stalkers

Surprise Guests Ch. 12

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Or Vocaloids, which is mentioned briefly in this story. I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _"Is that really you, Aoi-chan?" a male voice asks. Uh-oh. It can't be. I turn around and see-_

* * *

--Aoi-POV—

It's Kevin.

My not-so-secret-secret admirer. He, to put it shortly, is a butt.

"Y-yeah. Hi, Kevin." I swear, he might have been considered as "cool" was it not for his obsessive-ness, overconfidence, and his stalker-ish habits. That and he was a complete geek/nerd/dork kinda guy. Y'know?

"I can't believe it's you! I haven't seen you the whole summer, and I swear that talking to photographs isn't the same!!"

"Dude. Take a pill of the chill variety. Number one, summer started TWO WEEKS AGO. Number two, what photograph?"

"Duh. The one of you in the PE uniform."

I twitch. Our school was notorious for its skimpier-than-norm PE uniforms. Short shorts and t-shirts that were see-through when wet. Luckily, though, PE wasn't Coed. Still, can anyone say stalker?

"Why do you have a picture of me in the PE uniform?" I swear I heard one of my veins pop.

"Cause you're smexy." I was gonna whack him on the head but he grabbed my wrists. "And I want you to be mine." He leans in closer. I back away, but I can't get very far because he still has my wrists. I try to jerk my wrists out of his grasp, but he has an unusually strong grip.

I keep backing away until I hit the shelves. Stupid creepy obsessive stalker!!! As a last resort, I jerk quickly to the side, surprising him enough to let me go, and I run. I hear him coming after me, calling, "You'll be mine!"

"Dude!! Get away from me you rabid stalker! A supermarket is no place for your weird fantasies!!"

"Oh, so you wanna go so somewhere else with me?" he yelled back.

"Heck no!!" I weaved through to the frozen food section. Pretty interesting scene, though. Two teens, one chasing the other, through a supermarket yelling/arguing with each other. I wonder where the employees who are supposed to kick out the rowdy people are. Oh well. I continued running…

Smack-dab into Hidan.

"Come back here, Ohime-sama!" Great. Just what the world needs. Another nickname!!

"Who's he?" Hidan asked, a hint of… something in his voice. I couldn't tell what it was, I was too busy trying to get away from my stalker.

"A crazed, rabid, perverted stalker of mines. Get him away from me!!"

"Fine." He leaned in closer and he kissed me!! Okay, it was on the cheek, but it was still close enough to fool certain a stalker intent on making me his.

"%!& OFF!! She's mines." And then Hidan flipped him the bird, wrapped his other arm around my waist and walked off, leaving a stunned Kevin.

Phew. He's gone. I slump over, trying to relax. I look up at Hidan, who still hadn't moved his arm.

"Ano… Hidan-san. You can move your arm now."

"Huh? Oh, sorry." He removes his arm and I walk back to where I had left the cart. All of my stuff was still there. I push the cart toward the checkout, and wait in line. Hum dee dum dee dum. I tap my fingers on the cart handle impatiently. Hum dee dum dee dum. I start humming "Love is War." The person in front of me is trying to get the exact change, searching her pockets, swearing she has a penny somewhere. Finally, she finds it in her wallet and finishes paying for her stuff.

I pile all the stuff onto the conveyor belt. Hidan helps. I pay with cash. Gramps was considered as a rich person, and provided more than enough to pay for ten people a month every other week. I would visit him, if not for that she-devil.

Anyways, I roll the cart to the car, where Hikari, Midori and the others are waiting. Hidan helps out again with piling the stuff into the car, and we get inside.

I sigh again, glad to be rid the stalker. My cell rings. It's a text. "ur still mines"

"Who the heck gave that stalker my number?" I yell, causing everyone else in the car to wince. I text back, "mines blow up. & who gave u my # ?"

Ring. "ur friend. 4 $250" I sweatdrop. "Dang this brat has a lot of money!! Paying $250 just for my number!" Everyone stared at me. "Did I just say that aloud?"

"Yup." Nee-chan said. "Who're you texting, anyways?"

"Kevin." I spat out the name with as much hate and disgust I could muster.

"How'd he get your number?"

"Some friend sold it for 250 bucks. I'm gonna block him now."

"You go do that."

* * *

--Now, because I have nothing better to do, let's rewind and go see that last scene from Hidan's POV--

I was following… Hikari, was it? To the vehicle. I think Midori called it a truck. I helped her unload the groceries and then we sat in the car, waiting for everyone else. Midori and Deidara came, and sat in the car, waiting.

"Where's Aoi?" Midori asked.

"Still gone." Hikari. "Odd. She should be back by now."

"She met up with a problem." Midori said matter-of-fact-edly. "Hidan, go get her."

"What? Why me?" I asked. I had just gotten Jashin-sama's forgiveness for the first incident. I'm not sure if he would forgive me the second time around.

I went back into the giant store, not sure where to find her. I wander towards the frozen food section. And then a certain black haired blue eyed girl ran into me.

"Come back here, Ohime-sama!" a boy yells. It's obvious he was chasing her.

"Who is he?" I growl. I couldn't keep my voice level, my body was doing all this by itself. C'mon, Hidan! You're a shinobi! Keep calm! Great. Now I'm talking to myself in my head… can this get any worse?

"A crazed, rabid, perverted stalker of mines. Get him away from me!!" She glanced up at me, a desperate look in her eyes.

"Fine." I knew I would regret this later, but my body moved on its own. I kissed her cheek, right next to her mouth, to fool that #$%$*#.

"$^*#$% OFF." I said, flipping him the bird. I draped my hand around her waist and led her away from that #$^.

Why was I so angry? Why did my body move all on its own? Why did I do that once I saw that look on her face? What's wrong with me?

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: 1,000+

I think Hidan's kinda OOC with this one... Drat.

Yeah, two in a day. Because of Slee's constant nagging because of my cliffhanger. Anyways, a non-cliffy-ish ending.

It's for you, Slee-sama!!!

Review!! I live off of reviews!! And dead people can't update!!!

Uhh.. what else?

I didn't know what to do for who would "save" Aoi because the poll was tied. If you wanted DeixAoi fluff, then you should vote on mah polls!!!

On mah blog: Aoi

On Mah profile: Midori

I will make the fluff according to who's ahead in the polls. If it's tied, I'll take my pick. Yeah, so if you want a certain fluff, then vote in mah poll!!

I was thinking,_ Kevin has such a dirty mind. Wait a minute, I'm the author and I'm the one writing all this so what does this make me…?_

*Sigh*

And I might be getting sick. I have a really annoying sore throat that's worse than normal.

Whatever. I have coughdrops, I should be fine.

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan


	13. Enter Zetsu

Surprise Guests 13

Disclaimer: I don't on Naruto!!! I can only dream… *drools*

Recap: _Why was I so angry? Why did my body move all on its own? Why did I do that once I saw that look on her face? What's wrong with me?_

* * *

--Aoi POV--

Back at home, we finished unloading the car and put away all the food. Then I decided to get dinner ready. I'll make curry. Yum.

Hikari-chan decided to join us for dinner, and met our other guests. Tobi seemed really sad that he was left behind on our shopping trip. I agreed with Midori-nee-chan, though. That orange mask of his was way too noticeable.

While we were eating, yet another loud thunk came from my room. Is it just me, or does it always happen during a meal?

"Tobi, go check it out, un."

"Mmkay!!" Tobi happily skipped upstairs. Is he really supposed to be a ninja? Since when did S-ranked criminals skip?

"Welcome, Zetsu-san!" Tobi's cheerfully annoying voice rang through the house.

"Zetsu?" I ask.

"Wow, Aoi-chan. You're really far behind, aren't you." Hikari said. "The Venus flytrap guy."

"Oooh, so his name's Zetsu!!" The Venus flytrap guy was there, but his name hadn't been mentioned pre-Shippuden.

"Tobi, **Where the #%# are we**?"

"Good question!!! But Tobi doesn't really know…"

Tobi comes frolicking downstairs.

"A-O-I-chan!!!" he calls out. "Where are we?"

"[insert random city name here, IRCNH for short], California." I say.

"Where is [IRCNH]? **Where the $#&$&*are we**?"

I look up. I hear three people, but I only see two.

"Hey, it's a venus flytrap!! Hello, Mr. Plant-man!!"

"**Can we eat her**?"

"Don't eat Aoi-chan!! She gave Tobi and Sempai and Hidan-san and Kakuzu-san a place to stay!!"

"Are you a cannibal or something?" I ask.

"_**Yes**_." Two voices answered at once. Two?

"Oh. So that's what the meat was for. I'll go get some meat, then. How do you want the meat? Just raw?"

"**Yes.** Please."

I go downstairs to the giant freezer and grab several hunks of random meat. Upstairs I hear Midori telling Zetsu that he's from a popular manga. I walk past then to the kitchen, and dump all the meat into a metal bowl.

I bring the bowl outside and give it to Zetsu.

"Thanks. **You took too long**. Be grateful that she gave us food. **No. She took too long.**"

"…Are you arguing with yourself?"

"Yes, it kinda happens a lot. **Got a problem with that, #$^#**?"

"Geez, what's with everyone calling me that? I'm not that bad, am I?" Cue in pouty face…

Nobody's paying attention. At all. Cue in vein pop and annoyed face. Still no one pays attention. Never mind. I sit back down.

"So when'd you get here?" Midori asks.

"Just now. **#^$^**."

"That's not what I mean. Hidan-san and Kakuzu-san came 3 weeks your time after Deidara-san and Tobi came in. How long between Hidan's and Kakuzu disappearance and your coming here?"

"Leader-sama had told us to follow Hidan and Kakuzu in case they disappeared too. Then they fell into a puddle and disappeared. **Heh. How lame. S-ranked shinobi falling into puddles.** Anyways, after they didn't come up for about two hours, we decided to follow them. And here we are. **Whoop-dee-$%^&#-doo.**"

"Yeah, yeah. Just eat." I said. If it was Hidan, I wouldda stabbed him for swearing, but Zetsu's a cannibal. A scary cannibal. No threaten scary cannibals.

"So," Midori said, "time travels a lot differently in the different worlds. Hidan-san and Kakuzu-san "left" three weeks afterwards, but "came" about… four? five? hours after Deidara and Tobi.

"Zetsu-san 'left' about two hours after Hidan-san and Kakuzu-san, but 'came' a whole day afterwards. That means, not only does the time travel differently, this portal-thing spews you out at random."

"So you're saying that this portal thing is a puddle in their world… and the link to my world just happens to be my closet. Fun. Just fun."

"Yup!!" Midori said.

"Anyways, where's he gonna sleep? We now got no extra beds or anything…" I say, trailing off.

"Do you have a plant? **A nice, big plant**." A plant? What for? Oh no! Don't tell me!!!

"Double Cannibal!!" I scream, running like mad until I run into Deidara, effectively knocking him to the ground.

"When'd you get down there? Shouldn't you be sitting down?"

"I was, un. You just catapulted across the table right onto me, un!!!"

I looked behind me, and sure enough, I had jumped straight across the dining room table. Odd. I thought I was running like mad…

"Hey, since when could I jump that far?" I asked. I can barely manage getting off the starting point in the long jump…

"Shouldn't you be getting offa me, un."

"Hey, Deidara-san. What are you doing down there?" I cocked my head to the side. No wonder the ground was so soft. I poke it... Yup, it's soft.

"Oi. Quit poking me, un."

"But it's squishy!!" I poke harder.

"Hey, that's all hard ab muscle, un!! Muscle isn't "squishy!!" And quit poking me, un!"

"Will you two lovebirds just get off of each other and finish eating your dinner?" Midori said blankly. Hidan spewed out his drink, drenching Tobi in his spit.

I feel my face heat up at the mention of "lovebirds" And I quickly scoot off of his stomach and land on the floor. Hard.

"Ow, my butt!!"

Everyone looks at me funny.

"… I just said that out loud, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did."

"Ah, drat." And I calmly walk back to my seat and continue eating my now almost-soggy curry.

And they're still staring at me.

"What? I'm trying to eat here!!" They start eating again…

Cue in awkward silence.

"Awkward…" I say

"…Silence." Hikari finishes off for me. [**A/N: Don't go stealing this awesomeilcal idea from me!!! It's totally mines!! RAWR!!!]**

"Hey Tobi!"

"Hai!!" He mock saluted me.

"You're all wet. Go take a shower." I wave him away with my hand.

"I'll bring you some more clothes later." Midori said.

"Okays!! ^^" He skips upstairs, humming his own little happy tune.

"That boy… he's really carefree, isn't he?"

"I wonder how old he really is…"

"I don't even know what he looks like, un."

"PURPLE FLYING PONIES!!" I yelled. Everyone stares at me again. What's with the staring at me? Is there something behind me? I turn around, checking for hidden assailants and/or stalkers. Good. No one's there... that I could see. Urgh, creepy thought. Must shake head to clear it. I look up to find everyone staring at me.

"What? I was getting lonely again…"

"BAKA!!!" Hikari and Midori both whapped me on the head, making my hand drop down on my still unfinished bowl of curry. It catapulted into the air, landing on…

* * *

--End Chappie--

A/N: 1,000+ words

Wow, lame ending or what??

I'm planning a little something… since people seemed inclined towards TobixMidori. I have no idea why. I've never really thought of the two as a couple…

And anyways, as always, review and vote on my polls!!

There will be cookies!!

And not only cookies, but the one winning the poll for [uh, whoever…] will have fluff!!!

For example, last chapter's Hidan the Superhero scene. I don't think he was winning the poll, but it was tied. If it's tied, I get to choose!!!

Actually, Hidan's currently winning, but my bestest buddeh requested some DeixAoi fluff.

I don't think it's actuall "fluff" but "scenes" sounds… awkward. So fluff it shall be.

So Vote!!

I would have had this chapter out earlier, but I was sick with a fever of 103.2˚F and I couldn't speak at all with out coughing up my guts. Okay, it wasn't that bad, but still. So Mom banned me from my precious Computer and I slept in for half the day. And then we watched Ouran!!

I can talk now!! And sorta-sing. It saddens me to listen to my favorite Voca-songs without being able to hum along.

And Slee-sama isn't sick!! Amazing!!! She stayed over for the week, and she's still not sick!!!

Yeah, what else??

REVIEW!!! RAWR!!! Reviews make my new pet Killer happy. Isn't that right, Killer? RAWR!!!

We'll just ignore the fact that Killer just tried to bite off my hand. Thank all that is holy for metal chains and cages…

Anyways, review.

Ja ne, S1SKA


	14. Steamy Shower Scenes

Surprise Guests 14

Steamy Shower Scenes and Lemons 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!! Or anything else!!! Except for Killer, who hungrily waits for your reviews… RAWR

Recap: _"BAKA!!!" Hikari and Midori both whapped me on the head, making my hand drop down on my still unfinished bowl of curry. It catapulted into the air, landing on…_

* * *

--Aoi-POV--

It landed on Deidara, ruining his perfectly messy hair. He also had a new bowl helmet.

"Wow, how does curry catapult that far? I'm a genius!!"

"Deidara, you go take a shower too. Use the main one."

"Sure, sure, un." He heads upstairs. We finish our dinner, and I put away all the dishes. Midori heads upstairs and comes back with two piles of clothes. She gives one set to me and said, "Give it to Deidara."

"Why meeeeeeeeeeeee?"

"Quit being immature. Zetsu, you can probably stay in the master with Deidara and Tobi. I think I saw another futon upstairs…" I can't really hear her because she already left me with the clothes.

Sigh.

Big sigh.

I walk over to the bathroom and knock on the door. I hear the water turning off. "I have your clothes!!"

"Come in, un!" … I didn't hear the door unlock or anything… But it was unlocked.

"Dude!! Don't shower with the door unlocked!!" I yell back at him.

"You all know I'm in here, un!"

"Ew!! I'm not giving you your clothes until you're decent!"

"How can I be, un! I have no clothes!!"

"Use a towel, BAKA!!"

I hear grumbling.

"Fine! I'm decent, un!"

I open the door and walk in. Warm puffs of steam greet my face. I sneeze.

"Here's your clothes." I turn around and see a half-naked Deidara.

"OH MY GOSH!! YOU'RE A GUY!?!?!?!"

"Of course I'm a guy, un!! Did you think I was a girl or something, un!?!"

"NO!! Here's your clothes!!" I smile sweetly, and walk away, locking the door behind me.

* * *

--I'm gonna test out my luck with third person--

"NO! Here's your clothes!" Aoi said, tossing him the clothes. She said it with a smile so sweet, it would choke those poor, poor bunnies out there. She turned around and waltzed out, locking the door behind her.

Deidara stared, so dumbfounded that the towel wrapped around his waist dropped to the floor with a quiet plop. He just stood there, staring at the spot the girl had just previously occupied, thinking. _This girl_ _is something else_. He dried himself off and changed.

* * *

--Midori POV--

I showed Zetsu the room and headed towards the bathroom, knocking on the door.

"Come in, Midori-chan!"

"Are you sure? You decent?" I didn't want to walk into a naked guy. Half-naked is better than naked.

"Hai!" And the door opened revealing Tobi in his orange mask and a towel.

"I have your clothes." All of a sudden, the atmosphere around Tobi seems… darker. Wait, what am I talking about? It _is_ darker!! I'm psychic, for Pete's sake!

It's Uchiha Madara. I try to back away, but he's much faster. He grabs my arm, pulling me into the room. His other hand locks the door behind me. Crud. I'm sooo dead.

"How much do you know about me?" he asked, the signature Uchiha glare just threatening to spill out his mask.

"Everything." I simply glared back. Ah crud! What the heck am I doing? Oh well, as long as I'm dying might as well go all the way. I don't think being half-dead is very fun. It must hurt a lot.

If his mask wasn't on, his narrowing eye would have been clearly visible. But his mask WAS on. But I'm psychic!! Doesn't really matter. He pushed me against the wall. Hard.

His hand lifted my face up to look at him. I can't help it. I'm scared. Even though I knew that Madara would show himself sooner or later, I was still scared.

"You won' tell anyone, ri~ght?" he whispered into my ear. "Because I will be very unhappy if I find out you did."

I shivered, even though it was steamy and warm. I knew it, I was on the verge of tears. But it definitely didn't help that he was half-naked. No way did being half-naked ever help anyone in any situation. Except for X-rated scenes and seduction. Eww…. Just the words X-rated scenes and seduction makes people think bad stuff. So does steamy shower makes people think of… awkward stuff.

ANYWAYS, back to now. "Midori-chan won't tell anyone Tobi's secret, right?" he asked in Tobi's voice. Good. This was better. I could handle Tobi. But not Madara. Definitely not Madara.

"Yeah," I said, wiping away the tears that almost spilled earlier. "I'm fine, Tobi. Here's your clothes. You should dry yourself off and put them on."

I get off the wall and leave, still a bit shaky. Then I hear Madara saying, "Or your sister might get hurt." It wasn't might. It was a threat, I knew it.

Dang it, why did he have to bring Aoi into this! I don't want her to get hurt, not again. I slump down against the hallway, tired. I settled my head on my knees as I try to think this through.

Unknown by me, a certain orange-masked shinobi had settled next to me, watching me think. Arms threw themselves around me, pulling me into his lap and into a hug.

"Tobi's sorry. Tobi won't do it again, unless you tell Tobi's secret, okay?"

I nod blankly, not really paying attention. The arms move from around my shoulders to around my waist, pulling me in closer.

"You won't tell anyone about me, right?" Madara coos into my ear. I'm instantly alert, my eyes wide, my body stiff.

"That's no fun. Relax." He moves one arm to rest on my legs, the other rubbing my stomach lazily. It works, and my body loosens on its own. I feel myself falling asleep, my head against his chest…

* * *

--Aoi POV--

I hum a bit while I work on desert. My famous recipe, lemon cream pie! I was making two, since we have so many people. I working now on the lemon slices to decorate the top while the pie chilled for a bit.

Somehow, even with my knife expertise, I manage to cut open my finger. Add in the lemon juice, and you've got one heck of a hurt. I stick my finger in my mouth and continue cutting with my other hand. Apparently that hand was crazy or something because the knife ended up flinging into Hidan's head.

"OW!! What was that' for, #$%%?"

"Wow, Hidan. That knife or my hand must really hate you," I say, taking my finger out of my mouth. I walk over past the unicorn Hidan and get out the first aid kit.

"Hey, what happened to your hand?" He grabbed my hand and looked at the cut. "Here, let me help you."

"Hey-wait, I can do it myself."

"I _said_, let me help you." He sounded so serious, that I let him lead me to the dining room table and wrap up my finger.

"There. That should do it."

"Mmkay. Thanks!" I smile, my face lightly flushed. I walk back to the kitchen and pull out the pies. I put the lemon-roses I made onto the pie and set them out. Hikari had gone home, so I told Hidan to wait a bit while I got everyone else.

Kakuzu and Deidara were in the living room. "Dessert's ready." I said. All that was left was Tobi and Midori-nee.

I walk upstairs and see Tobi hugging a sleeping Midori. He seemed very serious while hugging her.

"…Am I interrupting anything?" I ask. He seemed surprised that I was, well, there.

"No, Tobi was just talking to Midori-chan and then she fell on top of Tobi but Tobi didn't want to wake her up and TOBI DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG!!!"

"It's fine, it's fine. Just wake her up and tell her it's time for dessert."

I go back downstairs and cut up the pie, giving everyone a slice.

"Enjoy!"

* * *

--End Chappie because S1ssy-chan here is too last to think of a good ending—

A/N: 1,300+ words

Yeah, with that chapter title, I bet you thought I meant something else.

No. Just no.

I'm ONLY 13, OKAY??

So I'm not writing any lemons.

So anyways, I bet many of you have figured out that this site is still kinda broken.

I don't think the email system thingie is working. I found out one of the authors on my email alert list updated, but they didn't send me an email for that.

And they still haven't.

So what not.

I hope you'll still review anyways. Almost hit 60 reviews!!!

And what else…

I never really thought of MidorixTobi/Madara, but give the people what they want, right?

Yeah, that's all.

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan


	15. Not just Lemons, but Lemon Cream Pie

Surprise Guests 15

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, and I don't think I ever will. *cries* But I do own Killer, who I have readily forgotten about for the past couple of chapters. So now, Killer's awfully hungry.

Usually, there'd be a recap here, but OMJ that last ending was so horrible that I won't have it twice in my stories.

* * *

-:-Aoi POV-:-

Tobi and my sister finally came downstairs, and I handed them a slice of the lemon cream pie. Why did I bother making that lemon rose again? Oh yeah, boredom. Nothing but extreme boredom. Ah… what boredom does to people…

We all sat down, munching on pie in silence. Munching, munching, munching…

"OH CRUD. I FORGOT TO FEED THE CAT." I practically yelled, knocking my chair down and opening the basement door. Deidei came out, meowing pitifully, and I walked over to where we kept the cat food and filled up his bowl.

"How'd he get in the basement again?"

"I probably threw him in there when I was cooking this morning…"

"That's usually considered as pet abuse," Midori says, sighing.

She finished her pie and put away her plate, heading upstairs. Soon almost everyone else besides me and Hidan finish the pie. They all head upstairs, leaving us two, alone. Well, Deidei's there too. Don't go start thinking weird things just because of the alone part. Pervs.

I shake my head and sigh, because there's still, like a third of on pie and over half of the other left. I guess we'll be having pies for breakfast tomorrow… Sigh.

"What was that sigh for?"

"Oh, you're still here?"

"Of course I'm still here! Just answer the $^&$ question, #%$*&!"

"There's too much pie left. I don't like pie for bre~akfast!" I mumble into my hand, making sure to be loud enough for him to hear.

I drop my hand from my face, and it manages to land on my fork, which leads to a whole bunch of chain events which eventually finishes up with a whole third of pie landing on Hidan's head. I laugh-smirk-smile.

"Wow, my hand or the pie must really hate you. I think it has to be my hand. First the knife, and now the pie…"

"$&*# you." He says, eyebrows twitching.

"Ew, no thanks. I'm only fourteen. Sick pedo-perv." I mumble the last part, getting another slice of pie.

"W-what? I didn't #$%&%$# mean it that way!" he yelled, his face turning pink. Because of his pale, albino-like complexion, it was easy to spot the blush.

"Haha, Hidan! Your face is all red!" I laugh, pointing at him. If it was possible, his face became even redder.

"That's it!" he roared. He got up quickly, knocking his chair down. He reached over the table, as if he was gonna strangle me. I "meep!"-ed and ducked, shoving the pie I was eating into his face.

"Well, that's one way to get rid of the pie." I commented from my ducked position on the floor. The pie slid slowly down his face and plopped onto the floor.

"Great, now I'm gonna have to clean it up."

"Oh, you're on now, #%&." He said quietly. Too quietly.

"What are you-" A piece of pie hit me on the head, the filling dripping onto the floor.

"Oh, you are so on, too." I say darkly. We start chucking the pie at each other, ignoring the steadily worsening condition of the room.

I duck behind my barrier made of the chairs, dodging the pieces of pie being aimed at me, or more specifically, my face. The, it dawns on me.

I pop my head up out of my barrier and ask, "Since when did we have so much pie-!" It sounded more like, "pie-EYE!! Because he jumped me.

* * *

-:-Midori POV-:-

We were all just upstairs in the master bedroom, and I was introducing everyone to the magical world called the television. Then we heard a loud THUMP!! coming from downstairs followed by a "Stay away from me, Hida- mrmph!"

I look over to Kakuzu, sweatdropping. "Are you sure it was okay just to leave the two of them alone down there?"

"I'm pretty sure that Jashinism doesn't allow any sort of sexual activities or anything of the likes."

"PEH!! KEEP THAT –MRGPH!-AWAY FROM MY MOUTH!!"

Everyone in the room exchanged glances with each other.

"You so sure now?" I ask, crossing my arms and raising an eyebrow. Nobody's getting away with messing with my little sister. Even though I usually seem indifferent, I DO care.

I get up off the floor, and walk down the stairs. I turn and see-

Hidan on top of Aoi.

Forcing a piece of pie into her mouth.

And all the walls covered in pie, the filling oozing onto the floor.

I just look at them, who don't notice me standing there. Well, at least they weren't doing anything.

I decide to make my presence known and comment, "Where did you two get all this pie?"

* * *

-:-Aoi POV-sorry for switching around so much!-:-

"Where did you two get all this pie?" I hear Midori-nee-chan's voice.

"Nee-chan, SAVE ME!!!!!" I say, somehow getting Hidan off of me enough so that my arms could reach out towards her and his hands were around my waist.

"No." she said bluntly.

"So cruel, Nee-chan!" insert anime tears and emo corner.

"Make sure you guys clean this up. And no hanky-panky unless you two get a room." She turns around and goes back upstairs.

I feel my face heat up at the mention of "hanky-panky."

"Get off of me Hidan… san." I say, trying to tug his arms off of me.

"…Call me Hidan." He mumbles into my back, his arms tightening around my waist.

"Yeah, yeah, Hidan, just get offa me so that we can clean this up." I tug at his hands again. This time, he lets go and gets up, offering me a hand to help me up.

"Thanks. Now, to get the towels." I survey the damage done to the room and sigh. This'll take at least a good hour or two…

"At least I don't have work tomorrow… Where _did_ we get all this pie?"

I look up at him, handing him a roll of paper towels and garbage bag.

"I… don't know…" he said, his voice trailing off. It was obvious that he was lost in his thoughts.

"Whatever. Get to work." I turn around and sigh. This'll be a long night…

* * *

-:-End Chappie-:-

A/N: 1,000+ words

Ha! This was sorta disturbingly fun to write…

I wrote practically all of this in one day!! Yesh!! Now to finish Sold! 2…

Yeah. Review. Reviews make Killer happy. Isn't that right, Killer? *Pokes Killer with stick* Ew, Killer, don't eat the stick!!

And, who/what do YOU think Killer is? Vote!! On my poll!!

* * *

So the pairings that this story is gonna eventually end up with are:

AoixHidan

MidorixTobi/Madara

HikarixItachi

There! Everyone happy?

If not, then it's your fault for not voting in my polls when they were open!

If you did vote, but lost, then it's the fault of the peeps who didn't vote!!

Ermmm is that all?

Oh yeah, I updated my profile!! It looks all cooler and stuff now. If you wanna learn a bit more about me, check out my I… section.

An Mah Blog Of Doom is where I post all my updates, as well as the occasional spoiler.

And my DA is full of my amateur-ish drawings of fem!Kakuzu, fan art and other stuffs. I'd love it if you'd check it out…*gets shot for shameless self advertisement*

* * *

heh... Hanky-panky...

Should I change the rating for this fanfic? There's not gonna be much else worse than this chapter…

Okay, my A/N has gone on long enough.

Ja ne, S1SKA


	16. Cookin with Mr Zetsu

-:-Surprise Guests 16-:-

**NOTE: S1ssy-chan has not died, fallen off a cliff or into a coma (~le gasp!).**

**Or even worse! Gotten a life!! (~le gasp the second!) Well, I wanted to get one, but they ran out a Walmart. And Target. And Costco. And every other darned store I bothered going to.**

Anyways, I'm gonna stop doing the disclaimers soon…

Yah, I don't own Naruto. And I probably never will…

Recap: _"Whatever. Get to work." I turn around and sigh. This'll be a long night…_

* * *

-:-Aoi POV-:-

After about two, three hours, we managed to get the all pie off of the walls and into the trash. I went upstairs to get Hidan another set of clothes before heading off to the showers myself.

_Stupid, stupid Hidan…_ I muttered darkly, rinsing out the cream. Even with all the hot water, it took well over a half hour to get all of the stuff out of my hair.

After I finally got all the pie out of my hair, and off of my skin, I decided that I've wasted enough hot water and turned it off, wrapping myself in a towel.

I then realized that I didn't have any clean clothes since I thought I'd get them dirty with my pie-encrusted self. … crud. Well, at least the bathroom was close to my room, right?

WRONG!! Midori for some reason had decided that it would be the perfect time to take a nice, long bath, so she used the main bathroom. I didn't like using the master bath, so I took the guest bathroom… At least it's closer to our room than the master bath.

So I was stuck, right in front of Hidan and Kakuzu's room, in a towel. Great. I tightened the towel around me, trying to cover up as much of myself as possible., and stepped into my flip flop slippers. I cautiously opened up the door and peeked around, looking both ways. Fast as I could, dashed out of the room and down the stairs, hoping that I wouldn't bump into anybody.

And yet I managed to trip down the stairs.

Awwww crud… With one hand hold the towel, the other nursing my wounded head, I walked over to my room and shut the door. What, you didn't really think that something would happen, right? Like me bumping into Hidan? No way! This is rated K+ only. Go read a rated M story if you wanted something like that.

* * *

-:-Next Monday morning-:-

It's now been a week since our "surprise guests" came over, and they seem to have adjusted quite well, especially since they're, like, from a whole 'nother world.

Waking up is almost always the hardest thing to do. I mumbled and got up. Hafta make breaky again… Darn.

After getting ready, I head downstairs to find Zetsu already up.

"So… how do you sleep with that giant venus flytrap thing on your head?" I asked.

"…"

"…" Apparently, neither side of Zetsu wants to answer. Piffle.

"Fine then, don't answer me. Gosh, be a meaner." I walk past him into the kitchen, where I get out some eggs and milk for French toast. I take the meat from the fridge and set it out in a bowl to… un-cold-ify itself. I dunno if he wanted the meat like, cold or at room temperature. So yes, un-cold-ify. Zetsu's just watching me with that creepy… Zetsu-stare of his.

…*sweatdrops*

"…hey… could you quit staring?" I ask, turning around to face him. Seriously, you could feel people's gazes on you… Well, at least I could. I'm uber-awsome like that.

"…"

"…"

"…Well, piffle to you to, Mr. Zetsu."

"…"

"Hey, that rhymes!!" Insert awkward silence here.

"…"

"You're…" White Zetsu starts, but

"**a real #$^*#, ya' know that?**" Black Zetsu interrupts him.

"…Something else." White Zetsufinishes, as if the other side of him never interrupted.

I bow with a "thank you" and go back to making the French Toast. And then it struck me.

"Wait just a (insert random "-ing" word here, but remember she's not a swearing person) moment!! How'd you fit in the kitchen with that thinga-ma-bobber on your head?" Points finger to said flytrap thing.

"…"

"**The food's burning, %$#**"

I check the French toast, but it wasn't burning.

"No it's not! Liar!" I childishly stick out my tongue at him. I thought I saw a vein pop, but I'm not so sure about that one. I don't really care and continue cooking. On a different pan I also cook bacon. The fat starts sizzling after a while. I love bacon fat… and then we use it to cook fried rice for later… Oh gosh I'm getting hungry…

I can hear the people upstairs wake up; that's a good thing, because breakfast should be finished in about 10 minutes.

"Oops," I say out of the blue. It's not like anything actually happened, it's just…

"HOLY CRUD SINCE WHEN WERE THERE PURPLE FLYING PONIES IN MY HEAD?!?!"

Midori, coming downstairs, provided this ever-logical and oh-so true answer: "Since always. Now shut up and make me food!! I'm starving!!"

"Fine, fine." I mutter, turning back to the toast. "I feel so unloved…" I mumble, adding in a little unseen puppy-dog pout. Continuing with the cooking I suddenly realized…

"Hey Nee-chan! How it the crud holy? Y'know like the "holy crud" kinda crud?"

"…"

"…"

**"Because a holy thing #$%^ed out the holy #$^$#, ^*&.**"

"You know, I never really thought about that…" Nee-chan said. "But I guess it's what Zetsu-san here said."

"Do holy things really neeed to poo?"

"**Just shut up and cook, #%^$!**"

"Meaner." I said, but I shut up anyways.

By the time I had finished cooking, everyone else had come downstairs. So I brought out the food and we ate. Yummy food. Especially the bacon in maple syrup. What? You mean that you don't like bacon in maple syrup? You should go try it! But not a lot of people like it, though. It's a special taste.

Anywhoo, Hikari was gonna come over later today, at least, that's what Nee-chan said. Something about "helping out with our guests."

So that means that I should clean up the house, doesn't it? …Nah. It looks fine as is.

Around noon time, after I started making sandwiches, the door bell rang. Midori opened the door and let in Hikari-sempai. She same skipping in, and headed over to the kitchen.

"Can I help?" she asked cheerily.

"Sure, sure." I said, waving around the mayo spatula. Said mayo spatula had quite a bit of mayo on it. Said mayo landed on Hikari-senpai's shirt. Said shirt did not look wearable any longer. Said… Okay, I'm kidding.

"Oops." Was all I could say.

"Well, I guess I'll have to borrow one of your shirts then, huh?"

As you can tell, this happened quite often. She actually fit quite well into some of my larger shirts.

She headed upstairs into my room while I continued making the sandwiches. In case you're wondering, the fried rice is gonna be dinner. Anyways, making sandwhiches. When all of a sudden, a loud THUMP!! comes from my room once again, but what I didn't expect was the scream that came following it.

* * *

-:-End Chappie-:-

A/N: 1,100+ words. A slightly longer chapter. As you can tell, I love cliffies. So I end the first chapter I've pulled out in a month with a cliffie.

**NOTE: S1ssy-chan has not died, fallen off a cliff or into a coma (~le gasp!).**

**Or even worse! Gotten a life!! (~le gasp the secone!) Well, I wanted to get one, but they ran out a Walmart. And Target. And Costco. And every other darned store I bothered going to.**

About that ^ I just had a slight writer's block that caused me to have to rewrite like, a third of the story a couple times. That, and I get distracted figuring out what's gonna happen in the [censored] arc, which is still at least a good 20 chapters away.

I don't have that much homework, either. If you check my DA, you can actually see that I'm still active.

And since you're here anyways, why not check out my other stories? Eh? Eh? EH?

…Gomen.

OTL I fail at life…

I'm gonna try and update as much as possible now…

Not gonna happen.

But I do want to update every story of mines at least once a month. I know, a big difference from my almost-every-day updates.

Any questions? Comments? Threats?

BYEEEEEE!!!! ~S1SKA/S1ssy-chan


	17. Enter Itachi and Kisame

-:-Surprise Guests 17-:-

Recap: _When all of a sudden, a loud THUMP!! comes from my room once again, but what I didn't expect was the scream that came following it._

* * *

-:-Story Start-O!-:-

As fast as possible, I dropped everything and rushed upstairs. Apparently everyone else thought the same, because I met up with alotta worried people at my bedroom door. Open the door- dang it it's locked. Oh well, that's what bobby pins are for, right? I pull one out of my hair and get to work when I remember that I can't pick locks.

"Nee-chan, you do it!" I yell, shoving the bobby pin into her hands. She kneels down and gets to work, opening up the door in record time. We cautiously peer inside, only to find Hikari hyperventilating. Why was she hyperventilating? Because the sole object of her affections and rabid fangirl attentions was sitting on top of her. Well, that explains a lot. Behind the two a shark-man stood, grasping a giant sword.

"Wait a minute…" I said, putting on a "thinking" face. Everyone's eyes focused on me, even those still in my closet.

"How'd you fit in there with that giant sword of yours?" I asked, pointing a finger. I heard Nee-chan facepalm, asking, "Don't you notice anything else?"

"Apparently not." Someone said from behind me.

"Shut up." I snapped, a bit pissy because my closet was all messed up now. I didn't want to have to clean it up again…

Hikari sat up, the dark haired Uchiha had long since gotten off of her. In fact, where was Itachi? I turned around to my left and jumped a bit. He was standing right next to me, conferring quietly with the other Akatsuki members. I heard some snippets here and there, including our names and "anime" and "manga." Surprisingly, Kisame had joined in the conversation as well. Odd. I never saw him coming. I knew their names; they had already appeared in the manga.

Talking about manga, I hadn't really been given a chance to really start reading Shippuden. I was only halfway through the second book! Well, I was a slow reader by nature, but still.

Both me and Nee-chan walked over to Hikari, sitting down, one on each side.

"You okay?" we both asked at the same time, causing all three of us to start laughing. I know that there's quite a lot of twins out there that can finish each other's sentences and talk simultaneously, but me and Midori aren't like that. Sure, we know the basic gist of what the other is thinking, but that's about it. Our minds think waaay too differently to be able to synchronize so easily. And so, it's a pretty big deal.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine." She answered, brushing the blue fringe out of her face. We heard footsteps and looked up; apparently they had finished talking.

"So we don't have to explain anything, right?" Stares were being directed towards me. "What? I'm lazy! But I have another question." I thought I heard a groan, but maybe that was just me.

"Where are they gonna stay? All of our rooms are taken, and I'm pretty sure we've run out of futons." Everyone was staring at me, amazed that I actually said something smart. Wait… I just called myself stupid by saying that, huh. Darn. Anyways, after some more talking we decided that they would stay in the guest room or something like that. And then I remembered that I had always wanted to do something if I had ever seen that giant shark-dude. So what do I do?? I go up to him...

And poke him. Hard. With a rolled up _Purple Flying Ponies_ _Monthly_ magazine. I swear, I saw my sister sweat drop and face palm, but not necessarily in that order. He turns around, a "what the heck" look slapped onto his blue face.

"Do you like sushi?" I asked, my innocent look at 100%. Now his face turned into a "WTF" sorta thing. I can see Hikari face palm from the corner of my eye. Both she and my sister know that poking a blue shark dude with a magazine and asking him if he likes sushi was probably #1 on my bucket list, after getting a purple flying pony, of course.

Without waiting for him to respond, I shove the door closed on all of them and start doing a little happy dance in the safe confines of my own room. I love happy dances. You just start, like, dancing when you're all happy and all that stuff. Sometimes it includes personal background music supplied from my inner mind mp3. I have an actual mp3, but it's not always at hand when my random happy dance mood swings comes up. I was so caught up with my happy dance that I didn't notice that the door slowly opened, and several head peered in. I finally realized that I had an audience when my loving Nee-chan dryly remarked,

"I knew it. But your happy dance is different this time around, isn't it?" Turning around, I saw almost everyone besides Kakuzu and Itachi, who frankly couldn't care less, staring at me. I stopped dancing immediately, freezing in place.

"Ehehehehe…" The slamming of doors commences, but this time the _click_ of the lock could be heard. Crud that was so embarrassing… but I bet they're already used to stuff like that coming from me. I hope.

Later, I crawl outta my room to start cooking dinner. I wanted to cook sushi, but as it happens, we don't have any fish. Darn, there goes my perfect plan of… doom and stuff.

"Nee-chan!" I yell, still searching through the fridge. "Are you sure we don't have anything for sushi?"

I don't hear anything, but I can imagine her sighing, in that "are you kidding me" way of hers that always seems pop up whenever I'm around. But moving on. Although we had no sashimi or sushi ingredients, what we DID have was good ol' fashioned beer-batter fried fish, courtesy of some random hobo down the street. Now, I know it's not a good idea to accept random food from strangers, especially random hobos, but who said I ever listened during those lectures? I popped it into the preheated oven and took out some corn on the cob and insta-mashed potatoes. After prepping/cooking those, I started to set out the table ware. Y'know, the knifes and forks and plates and napkins and…

Yeah, I think you peeps know what I'm talking about… So anyways, they piled around the table, a space open for me between Nee-chan and Kisame. Hikari had gotten a seat next to- who else?- Itachi. I brought out the food, which was like a kajillion really big heavy bowls. Stupid guests didn't even bother to help out. Psh, what use are they?

Nee-chan had the dining room television set to the news channel, which we watched, half paying attention and half eating. About halfway through the meal, I poked the giant shark dude, whose sword was upstairs somewhere, and asked,

"How do you like the fish?"

Awkward silence ensued, except for the throbbing of a vein on a certain blue forehead. The normal dinner chatter continued, only to be interrupted by who else, but me, pointing at the TV.

"Hey, it's that random old hobo down the street who gave the fish!"

* * *

-:-Story end-:-

A/N: 1,200+ words

**WHOOPS I accidentally put up the wrong chapter again... *is shot* but here it is~!**

***dodges all the items thrown***

HELP ME!!! Yush, S1ssy-chan here is running out of ideas~! For all of my stories, actually, but that's beside the point.

C'mon, you readers! I know there's a whole bunch of creative, literate ones out there!! *holds out Killer* Gimme Ideas~!

A whole bunch of random ones will work well, too.

And for a slight spoiler, just two words. *spiked fish* So some pretty CRAZEH things are gonna be happening, I just need some help with the things. And the CRAZEH. And some other ideas.

Just chuck 'em at me~! Even if I don't use it now, it may be used later, y'know?

Does anyone even bother reading my A/Ns? Oh well.

Ja ne, S1SKA~


	18. Don't hate me

Surprise Guests 18

Recap: _"Hey, it's that random old hobo down the street who gave me the fish!"_

-:-Storeh Start~-:-

The announcer lady continued with her, well, announcement. "_This particular man, name disclosed, hasn't been around these parts for long. Locals say that he started to give out some sort of paper-wrapped packages to random passerby last week. These packages turned out to be fried fish. The fish contained a chemical that, when consumed, makes people veery drunk."_ Multiple sets of accusing eyes turned to stare at me, dumbfounded.

"What? It was free food!" That didn't stop their stares, in fact, those very stares seemed to get even more intense. Pretty soon, I was getting dizzy, and all those stares swirled into nothingness.

* * *

-:- Midori's POV-:-

We all watched as Aoi stared swaying, her eyelids drooping. Then she fainted, and I let out a sigh.

"Great. The last thing we need is a drunk Aoi." As I said this, several other people also fainted, causing me to sigh once more. "Or a drunk anybody."

Giggles came from the floor, where Aoi lay, laughing to herself. "I'm gonna go upstairs, then. C'mon, Hika-" right as her name was said, the girl fell into a dead faint.

"Okay, then. I guess I'll just go up my self." Looking around, I saw that everyone else except for Zetsu was out cold. Zetsu hadn't eaten the deadly fish due to his preference for red meat.

Halfway up the stairs, I started feeling lightheaded, and closed my eyes to fall back into someone's arms. "Careful, Midori." A voice whispered into my ear as everything went black.

* * *

-:-3rd Person time~-:-

The girl blinked continuously, her face red and blue eyes droopy. _Where am I? I'm not in bed. I wanna be in my bed…_Slowly, clumsily, she crawled to where she thought was her room. She tripped and fell over something big and warm. She tried continuously to get up, but her body just wasn't moving the way she wanted it to move. Why was her body so slow and heavy? The big warm thing started to stir, a long arm snaking around her waist, pulling her against it like a giant teddy bear. _This isn't my bed…_

Naturally, she tried to get out, but whatever drug was in that fish was doing its magic. Her slow and lethargic movements did nothing against the iron-grip that held her. Eventually, she drifted off to sleep, a pout on her face.

* * *

The orange-masked shinobi looked down at the girl cradled in his arms. She slept peacefully, unaware of the one watching her sleep. He shifted a bit, his arms a bit sore. In turn, the girl stirred a bit, groggily opening her deep green eyes. The single eye that could see out of Tobi's lollipop mask noticed her flushed cheeks and half-closed lids.

"Toobiii~!" she said, in a voice that could be easily mistaken for a small child's. She turned around so that she was sitting on his lap, resting the back of her head on his chest.

"What is it, Midori-chan?" Tobi answered, plopping a hand onto her head.

"Midori's hungry, Tobi-kun!" it was true, right after she said it, her stomach let out a loud, "gimme-food-before-I-collapse-and-eat-myself" kinda growl. She turned her head back as far as she could and smiled.

"Close your eyes, okay Midori-chan?" A head nodded in response. Arms wrapped around her tight as she felt the wind whipping her hair. Wait just a minute… wind? She opened her tightly closed eyes to find herself standing in her backyard, a cloth already set up for the midnight picnic.

"Sugoi~" she said, eyes wide open as she surveyed the night sky. That particular night was probably one of the best for sky-gazing. It was as if the heavens themselves opened up their curtains, for there was not a cloud in sight. The moon, although it wasn't full, shone brightly enough to see quite comfortably. Spread out across the darkness, the stars twinkled their way into Midori's eyes. She turned around, hoping to say something to Tobi, but as luck would have it, she tripped over a rock.

Ah the classic anime scene… fluff… Girl and guy out in field at night without anyone there for some reason. Girl or guy trips, lands on top of the other, and then they kiss. Well, that's what was with Midori and Tobi right now. Except for the whole, "kiss" thing.

Midori found herself sprawled across Tobi's lap, her head on his stomach as she stared into the single eyehole of his mask. She blinked, apparently unaware of the position she was in. Sure, her cheeks were red, but that was because of whatever drugs was in that fish. Madara found himself contemplating on the drunk Midori versus the actual one.

She was like a whole nother person, almost as vastly different as-and Madara chuckled a bit at this- Tobi and himself. Personally, Madara liked the normal Midori. For him, as well as many others, one Tobi would be far more than enough to last a whole lifetime or two.

Of course, the classical anime scene was completely ruined by yet another "I'm hungry, feed me" roar from Midori's tummy. Tobi laughed, and sat up, pulling Midori onto his lap. He pulled out a couple of onigiri from nowhere and handed them to the girl. She proceeded to unwrap the rice ball and eat it, holding it with both of her hands, like a hamster would eat a seed. So concentrated was the girl that she failed to notice arms wrapping around her waist.

"Ne, ne, Tobi-kun!" she piped up, trying to turn around but failing due to the arms hugging her. "Don't you want any?" The arms loosened, and she sat on his lap facing him. Holding up the onigiri to his mouth, she realized that the mask prevented him from eating it.

"You have to take off your mask to eat, Tobi-kun!" She started to lift up the mask before a gloved hand shot up to stop her.

* * *

Finally, the iron grip loosened, releasing Aoi to the floor and waking her up, at least partially. The drug was still in full effect, her drowsiness blocking her rational thinking. Clambering around a bit more, the girl found herself on the floor again, having once more tripped over some big hulking sleeping thing. Except this particular thing wasn't asleep.

Her blue eyes met the pinkish-lavender ones of the Jashinist, both with the eyes of the half-asleep. Large hands engulfed her smaller ones, pulling her up so that she leaned against the wall. They spent what felt like eternity staring into each other's eyes. Hidan's face moved closer to hers, as he leaned in. He closed his eyes, pressing his lips against…

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The wall. The girl, which he had missed by a long shot, was curled up, asleep on the floor.

* * *

-:-Storeh end.-:-

A/N: 1,130+ words

Tsk, tsk, tsk. Man, do I know how to ruin a perfectly good moment. I am smiling evil-y at my, well evilness. No, Hidan does not get to kiss Aoi anytime soon. And I plan to keep it that way. *dodges all the stuff thrown*

Anyways, part one of the spiked fish is done. Next comes the part when everyone's hyper. Any ideas you'd like ta share?

And I finally remembered that I was supposed to have Midori and Tobi be together somehow, so… fluffy stuff.

Just curious. How many of you people out there hate me now because of that ending that I had heck fun in making?


	19. Good Morning

-:-Surprises Guests 19-:-

Recap: Do you guys really want to see that again? No recap.

* * *

-:-Storeh start, Midori POV-:-

_The tense air was filled only with the sounds of her ragged breathing. Blood poured out from where hole was on her stomach, blood pouring out everywhere. She looked at her teammates in disbelief, as well as the silver-haired man who sported the same wounds, yet did not falter. _Silver-haired man… _Suddenly she gasped, putting her head into her hands. Memories started flooding back into her head as she coughed out even more blood. _

"_H-Hidan?" she barely managed to spurt out, coughing up even more blood. The Jashinist stared back at her, his pink eyes taking in every gory detail. How could he stand to see her like this? After he finally got her back? _Why, Jashin-sama? Why **her**?

_A single tear fell from her eyes as she collapsed against a tree, her breathing shallow. He knelt down next to her, a shaky hand reaching towards her face. His hand rested on her cheek as he continuously murmured, "Why, why, why?" She unsteadily lifted up her hand, placing it on his cheek. She smiled one last smile, tears streaming down her face._

"_I-… I'm sorry… Hi… dan… I…" but her strength died out before she could finish her last message. Her hand dropped back down to her side, her eyes dead. Finally, the Jashinist cried, pressing his lips against her cold ones. _

_He slowly got up, looking back at those who dared to kill her. _

Green eyes snapped open, and I woke with a start. Holy… What was with that dream? It's kinda weird, actually. Usually, Aoi has all the weird dreams, and I have the psychic powers of premonition. A dream, at least for me, is very strange. For the rare dreams I **do** have, they usually come true. Even worst still, that girl looked a lot like me. A cold shiver runs down my back as I try to comprehend what that dream meant. It's more than a little cold, but there's something warm against my back to keep me warm.

I shiver a bit more as the wind blows past me. Wait a minute… _the wind?_ This time I really open up my eyes, and see that I'm in the backyard. When did I get here? As I try to get up, I find that there's something holding me down. I slowly craned my neck around to see the one thing I definitely did NOT want to see when I woke up- the orange swirly mask that was always plastered onto Tobi's face. And if the mask was there, then Tobi would be there too.

Oh. So _that's_ where the heat's coming from. Gingerly, I tried to pry his arms from around me, but I guess he woke up. Next thing I knew, he was sitting upright and I was seated on his lap. Ohh… Kay… Not what I expected. Or wanted. Or ever expected to want. Or… crud now I'm starting to act like Aoi..

"So…" I'm not really sure what normal people would say in times like this.

"So…" When people repeat what you say, it's not really helpful. Especially when you're trying to get out of an awkward silence.

"What are we doing out here?"

"You got hungry."

"Really? I don't remember that…" and with that, my stomach decides to welcome the morning once more.

A darker-ish-but-still-Tobi-ish chuckle comes from the orange-masked ninja that (I just remembered!) I was sitting on.

"Well, I guess we should get you some food again, huh?"

I nodded dumbly; I just wanted the food.

"Close your eyes." Almost as if out of instinct I obeyed.

Some poof of wind and some whirlwind later, I found myself in the kitchen, in front of the fridge, the swirly abomination known as Tobi nowhere in sight. Whatever, I thought as I opened the door and grabbed the carton of milk.

* * *

-:- Aoi POV-:-

Hmm… for some reason, my pillow today decided to be too firm. I think I remember that punching it should help… So, that's what I did. Except, last I remembered,

"Aw, #&*%!"

Normal pillows wouldn't cuss at you when you punch'em.

So what did this mean? Yush, you guessed it: THIS AIN'T MY PILLOW. So what was it then? I cracked open my eyes to see a very pissed off Hidan. Well, that's not something you see every day. …Wait, it is. He gets pissed way too often. Um… that's not something you see when you wake up every day. There! I got it!

Anyways, yush, A PO'd Hidan is exactly what I've always wanted to see when I wake up. Can you see that sarcasm? Because I can't. Sarcasm isn't visible, remember? Anyways, pissed Hidan. Check. Uhh… what else do we need? Oh yeah, me, check. I think that's all. Put that all together, and what do you get?

That's right, a whole heck lotta fun. Wait, that's not it. It's actually ends up with me getting choked again, pushed against the wall. Who wudda thunk that? And let me tell you, getting choked is definitely not what I'd consider as "fun." In fact, I'd consider it as "not fun."

"H-Hidan!" I manage to gasp out. I was thinking that it would bruise, but before I could mull over that any longer, I fell into a dead faint.

* * *

-:- 3rd POV again-:-

The teen, holding the carton of milk to her lips, stared blankly at the sight before her. Sure, most people would have freaked out at the sight of the limp body in the man's hands, but she was already used to it.

"Care to explain, Hidan?" she asked, taking another sip from the carton.

"…" No matter how loud he usually was, for once he was quiet.

"I guess not," Midori said as she stepped over a lump that was a drunken somebody, taking a seat at the dining room table. She pulled out a cereal bar and ate in relative silence, her thoughts wandering off.

* * *

Hikari woke up with a start, only to find the man of her dreams staring. right. at. her. Well, not exactly staring, since he was in quite a deep sleep. _**Dang**__, he's so cute when he's sleeping…_

She cautiously poked his smooth cheek, barely containing a fangirl squeal that was trying very hard to get out. A content sigh found its way from her lips as she enjoyed her own personal utopia, gazing at his handsome face.

Obviously, this moment happened to be interrupted by a certain loudmouth's noisy cussing. Hikari pouted and reluctantly got up, making her way to the dining room. Unlike the other teen who was calmly sitting at the table, she was somewhat shocked at the sight before her. By now, Hidan had let go of Aoi, who was practically a lifeless form slumped onto the floor.

"That's not something you see every day," She commented, eyebrow raised.

"Actually," Midori said, emerald eyes looking up. "It's something _I_ see every day."

"Okay then…" came the somewhat disturbed reply as Hikari settled into a seat next to Midori.

"Does anyone remember what happened last night? My mind's blank." Hikari said, rubbing her temples tiredly.

"Nope." Midori said, finishing off the rest of her cereal bar. Zetsu all suddenly came up from the ground, as if summoned. A smirk was stuck on his face as he walked upstairs.

"…I get the feeling he knows something." Midori pointed out, taking yet another gulp from the milk carton.

"…You're right."

"He didn't eat the fish, did he?"

"Nope."

"!$^" this one came from the floor, where Hidan for some reason was still sitting. Before anyone could comment as to why, the once-limp girl flared to life, and her fist connected with Hidan's jaw.

"I'm hun- ah crud." She said, cradling her now-injured hand. She turned around to the silver-haired man behind her, more than a bit pissed. "It's all your fault, Hidan!" The other occupants of the room sweatdropped, because they knew that she would be even more pissed once she saw the bruises on her neck. Hikari suddenly got up, grabbing the home phone as she went upstairs.

Aoi seemed to realize what she was doing; a muttered "ah crud the second" could be heard coming from her as she remembered about work. Looking around her she realized that she probably couldn't go to work today. _I hope he isn't too pissed… _She clumsily got up from the floor, almost falling during the attempt. Aoi dusted herself off before walking into the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

Hikari came back downstairs to the smell of homemade chocolate chip waffles, which eventually got everyone else in the house to gather into the dining room. Also being served was bacon, sausage, and some beef for Zetsu.

After the table was set and the food was served, everyone dug in, except for the two new additions, who were still unused to the exotic silverware. Aoi frowned, she happened to be sitting next to the giant shark man. He seemed to be having a lot more troubles than his stoic partner, who was faring much better.

"Wow, Mr. Shark." She said, using one of her most childish voices. "You're not very good with forks, are you?" Puppy dog eyes were added for the final effect while Hikari pretended to gag.

"All you're missing is the sparkly-shiny-Mary-Sue-desu effects." The dry comment came from- who else? Midori.

"~le gasp! You're right!" Aoi, well, gasped with fake shock, extending her fingers to cover her mouth.

"Anyways, Mr. Sharky," she continued, as if that interruption never occurred, "You're not very good with forks, are you?" She could see veins twitching, his large hands shaking as to not throttle her.

"Does Mr. Sharky taste like fish?" she asked the classic question, before grabbing his arm. "Because Aoi-chan likes fish." That was all she said before she clamped her teeth down into his arm.

* * *

-:-Storeh END~!-:-

A/N: 1,600+ words

Hope you guys enjoyed this longer chapter.

Anyways, on another note, **THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME REACH 100+ REVIEWS!! THIS COULD NOT HAVE BEEN ACCOMPLISHED WITHOUT YOUR SUPPORT~!**

I never actually thought that I could ever get 100 reviews. And so, ta celebrate, I have a drawing that I did~!

heck with it; the link's on mah profile. But you gotta scroll down untill you get ta the "links" parta it. right before the storeh info.

Oh! Random Question tiem~!

Would you like to see a love triangle involving Aoi, Kisame, and Hidan, with Hidan being the ultimate victor, of course. Why Kisame? I dunno… .

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan~!


	20. Mr Sharki

-:-Surprise Guests Ch. 20-:-

W00t~ I've hit 20 chapters, yush~

Anyways, Recap: _"Does Mr. Sharky taste like fish?" she asked the classic question, before grabbing his arm. "Because Aoi-chan likes fish." That was all she said before she clamped her teeth down into his arm._

* * *

-:-Storeh start-:-

At first nobody dared to move. All were too busy staring at the girl, who still had her teeth sunk into Kisame's arm. Everybody could see when she frowned, letting go of his arm. Spitting out… something, she said, "He doesn't taste like fish!" She was not pleased. Kisame's WT# look was still stuck on his face, and then he looked down on his arm- it was bleeding pretty badly.

Midori was just looking at her sister, thinking. The said blue-eyed girl suddenly jumped up, her eyes even more sparkly than before.

"Mister SHARRRRKKIIIIII~" she said before pouncing on him, somehow managing to get onto his back. She started making this noise that could be defined as a human purr and rubbing her face against his back.

"I'm guessing it's the fish." Hikari said, looking over to Midori.

"Yup, it's the fish." Midori said, getting up. Grabbing the back of Aoi's shirt, she pulled her sister off of the giant shark man and whapped her pressure point once more. The girl fell once more into a dead faint, emphasizing the "dead." Midori sighed, getting back to her seat. Kisame was just staring at her, then her sister, then back again.

"So you're just gonna leave her there." Kisame said blatantly, wiping the blood off with a napkin.

"Of course. She'll get up sooner or later, like she always does. But if you insist, Kisame, bring Aoi over here, will you?" She pointed a finger for emphasis. He complied, grabbing her wrist before dropping it in surprise.

"…she doesn't have a pulse."

"Yeah, way to point out the obvious, Fishsticks. Are you gonna bring her here or not?" Midori asked, a bit more demandingly. He grasped her wrist in once more, this time pulling her so that he carried her bridal-style.

"Midori, you never really told them, ya know?" Hikari said, twirling her hair with her finger.

"Oh, right. With so many people here I completely forget who's been told and whatnot." Midori stood up, and licked her sister's cheek. Blue eyes popped open with a "Hello, Mr. Sharky." She giggled and hiccupped, acting quite obviously drunk. Aoi wiggled around a bit in his arms, trying to get comfy before wrapping her arms around a surprised Kisame's neck. But before she could do anything else, an elbow to the pressure point sent her back to sleep. Of course the pissed off Hidan did not go unnoticed by Midori.

"She's just weird like that. Faints twice as easy then the normal human. Includes anything from suffocation to emotional trauma to alcohol." As Midori listed these things, she numbered them off with her fingers. "As a bonus, emphasizing 'bo' and 'nus,' she stays drunk twice as long and is very sensitive to drugs and alcohol." She looked up at Hikari, saying, "Is that all?"

Hikari nodded, "Yup, I think that's the gist of it."

"So, right now, she'd still be drunk." Midori ended the lecture with that short statement, settling her hands on her hips. "Man, I have such a crazy sister…" she mumbled, sitting down once more. Hikari continued eating, and the dinner room returned to its some-what normal levels of talking and what not. Except for the absence of random spurts from Aoi, who was still nestled quite comfortably in Kisame's arms.

Hidan was, in a word, pissed. In two words, really pissed. In three words, pissed. off. Thing is, he didn't really know why. And that just pissed him off even more. He was starting to lose it, and sighed. If only he knew why, then at least he could try to take care of it. Back where they had popped from, if someone had pissed him off this much, they would've been dead and sacrificed by now. Talking about sacrifice, Hidan hoped that Jashin-sama would be okay with what meager things he could offer. They weren't allowed to harm anyone, and at this rate, Hidan could be in big trouble.

This particular shark-dude-man-thing had almost completely forgotten about the girl in his arms. He was just standing there, letting his thoughts wander to his sword and whether or not it would be okay since they were told not to harm anyone. What would Samehada do without his/her/its food? He/she/it would need to eat something sooner or later, right? He knew that his sword had a presence of some sorts, but he never really figured out its gender. Or if it even had one. Which was possible, since swords generally don't have genders. He was completely oblivious to the girl sleeping peacefully in his arms, it's not like his arms were tired or anything. After all, he would spend practically 24/7 carrying Samehada, which was at least as heavy as her. But he did notice that Hidan was getting a bit edgy for some reason. Odd, wasn't it?

"Mmmph…" Aoi stirred a bit, apparently having a dream of some sorts. She shifted around in Kisame's arms, trying to get comfy. It was then that he realized that she was still in his arms. His eyes opened ever so slightly, trying to keep a straight face like his partner always could. How could he forget that someone was in his arms? It just felt so comfortable, like holding Samehada. Maybe that was why he never noticed, he was so used to carrying something all the time, anyways.

Eventually, the group moved to the living room to watch the television, Aoi still sleeping in Kisame's arms. Her head lolled a bit to the side, her mouth starting to droop open when suddenly her eyes snapped open.

"Nyeeeh! The purple flying ponies!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up into the air. She sat up so fast that her head bonked against Kisame's jaw, causing tremendous pain to the both of them.

"%&#!"

"Ow…" she moaned, clutching her head. Hikari looked over to Midori, exchanging glances before voicing her thoughts aloud.

"Do you think she's still drunk?"

"It's hard to tell," Midori replied, "doesn't she always act a bit on the drunkish side?"

"Only a bit?" Hikari asked with a raised eyebrow.

Aoi, meanwhile, was now on the swordsman's lap, as he had managed to drop her out of shock. A pout was on her face as she tried to nurture the throbbing head wound. Of course, it is very well near impossible to tend to a wound on the top of your head. Hikari, sighing, got up and returned with an ice pack. Gently pressing the cold compress against the wound, Hikari continued to playfully fuss over the girl. Itachi semi-watched with keen interest that he managed to hide behind his impassive demeanor. He was obviously better at remaining pokerfaced than his blue-skinned partner. Tobi chose this time to come skipping downstairs, humming his own little happy tune.

"Ne, ne, Aoi-chan-!" he then noticed the wounds she sported. [insert gasp here]

"What happened, Aoi-chan?" One could tell he was worried, despite the fact that his face remained unseen. He kept on making these cute fussy-fussy gestures that normally only a mother could accomplish. For a cold-hearted ninja like him, Midori noted, he sure can act out such a childish, caring manner.

"Stupid Mr. Sharki…" Aoi muttered, still holding the ice pack to her head. She looked up at him and frowned again.

"Why'dya hafta be so dang tall?" she said, obviously annoyed by his tall-ness. She pouted before continuing. "I never really liked tall people. They block my way and make me feel short."

"Maybe you're just short, hm." a sing-song voice chorused. An amused Deidara watched from the opposite end of the couch, supporting his face with his hand. Aoi twitched in response and retaliated with ease.

"You're one to say that, pfft. You're hardly taller than me!" she practically spat back, a vein in her forehead now throbbing.

"Look who's the one shorter than me, hm?" Both of them were getting agitated by now.

"Gosh! You're so immature! You act like you're seven or something, ya old man!" She "hmmphed" and turned around briskly, crossing her arms and huffing. Still seated on Kisame's lap, she continued huffing and puffing until the house blew down. The End.

* * *

-:- Chapter End-:-

A/N: 1,350+ words. OAO! They're getting longer~!

…Okay, I admit, that ending was random. *is shot*

And now, I have no idea what ta put for the storeh. Any ideas, anyone? Hello? (hello, _hello, ello, llo, lo~_)

C'mon, let your creative juices flow and let me soak 'em up like a sponge of some sick deranged sort.

On another, slightly/not really happier note, I already have the ending all planned out. I'm surprised that [almost] no one actually asked about the "dream scene" from the previous chapter, as that scene **is **gonna happen.

Ooh, I've your attention now, no?

* * *

But before that happens, I first off,

1) Need to get the couples closer together

2) Need to finish up this arc

3) _And_ the arc after that

4) And re-read the Naruto Chapters

5) And figure out how to portray Kisame

6) …

7) I think that's it, lawl.

Can anyone help me with (1) and (5)?

* * *

I guess you people are already used to Aoi-san's weirdness, no? . Nobody seemed flinch after she drove her teeth into his flesh.

Also! I finally remembered about Deidara, who I completely forgot had existed.

Pein and Konan's not gonna be here in this arc, sorreh.

Any other questions? Ask!!

Oh! There's a NEW quiz on my profile. :P But it's for the pairings you'd like ta see in my other storehs. Check it out, if ya must.

And to conclude this long A/N,

Ja ne~! S1ssy-chan


	21. Work the First

-:-Surprise Guests 21-:-

Recap: Luzzles, I keep on skipping this part.

* * *

-:-Story Start~-:-

"Oh yeah, Aoi," Hikari said. "Boss said that it'd be okay if we're just a bit late. It'd be just as if we both had school." When Aoi had school, she went to work at 3:30pm.

"So there should be enough time for you guys to get ready, no?" Midori said, looking over to her sister. She seemed to be normal, but you can't always exactly tell with her. For some strange, unknown reason, Aoi was still in Kisame's lap. Right now she was chugging down a glass of milk, and she managed to spill some onto his shirt. A quick wipe with a napkin dealt with that as she finished off the rest of her drink.

"Aoi," Midori said, looking over at her sister. In response, she turned around to face Midori.

"Yush?" She still looked kinda sleepy, but she should be fine by now.

"We hafta get ready for work, mmkay, Aoi?" Hikari said.

"Okies." She put the cup down, and clumsily climbed out of Kisame's lap. She headed upstairs and started to take a shower.

* * *

-:- Let's go back to Aoi's POV, shall we?-:-

Feeling refreshed, I stepped out of the shower. There's nothing like a good 'ol shower… besides ice cream. Num, I love ice cream… Now I'm hungry. I _would _yell at my sister to get some food ready, but I'm the one who does all the cooking around here. Drat.

Psh… after getting dressed and wrapping my wet hair in a towel, I headed back downstairs. Everyone was gathered in the living room still. I went the other way, to the kitchen. Peering into the pantry, I found some breakfast bars, which would do.

I went back to the living room to find out that there were no more seats. Every single inch of our nice sofa was taken. Wonderful. Where to sit? How did I even manage to fit on that thing? Hm… I grabbed a chair from the dining room and dragged it over so I could sit. The tv was showing some news, among other things. Many times the news around our parts is interrupted with sudden outbreaks of kiddy cartoons. I dunno why. It just happens.

Several interruptions of Berny the Pink Dinosaur later, Hikari told me that it was time to get going. We left, Hikari using her smaller car.

By the time we were almost there, Hikari realized that she had forgotten something, and dropped me off. I walked into the Naruto theme again. Boss had found it so popular that he decided to extend the theme a bit longer. Into the dressing room, with the file and contacts at hand.

* * *

-:- Hidan POV-:-

What's wrong with me? I keep getting angry for no reason, which is weird. Ever since coming over here, it seemed that I had finally calmed down. There wasn't no random orders from "Leader-sama," which had always ticked me off. So what's happening to me now?

That Hikari chick came back inside, apparently she forgot something.

"You," she said, pointing at me. It looked like she was in a hurry.

"Yeah?"

"Come'ere." And then she drags me over to her car. We drive over to some other place, where she makes me carry some heavy stuff over to the car. She then proceeds to go over to some other place. We still haven't been taught to read any of this, this "Engrish" so I have no idea where we are.

"Boss! I brought it!" she yelled, heading inside. She motions for me to follow. As if I can't understand her. And then I saw here.

What the $& was that Konaha chick doing here? Her and her &$* eyes just piss me off. Why that little…

* * *

-:-Aoi POV-:-

I stepped out of the dressing room, all decked out in my authentic-looking cosplay.

"Hinaata-chan!" I gasped, blushing, as a blonde threw an arm around my shoulder.

"N-Naruto-kun!" Gosh, it's hard to stutter so much. Why, why can't Hinata get herself some backbone? That girl's just making it harder for me. I inwardly sigh, but outwardly, I'm nervous and red. Man, I am such a good actor. I'd pat myself on the back if I could.

"Could you bring this over to table 8?" he holds out a tray laden with some dango and tea.

"H-Hai!" I give a quick nod, grabbing the tray and rushing off. I love dango, but I can't eat it yet.

"Here you go…" I say, giving the customers their food. I looked up, there was 'Kiba' and 'Shino.'

"A-Ah! Kiba-kun! Shino-kun! Good afternoon!" My word, all these formalities are gonna be the death of me. Bleh.

"Hinata, we've got two orders for omurice." 'Shino' said, his eyes invisible behind those small sunglasses. Talking about sunglasses, where does one get such small dinky little sunglasses?

"H-hai!" I went over to the kitchen and brought it over, trying to balance them as I walked over to 'Kiba.'

"Boss! I brought it!" Oh, that was Hikari-senpai. She must've gotten whatever she'd forgot, then. Handing the tray over to 'Kiba' to take care of, I turn around to see-

The ceiling, since now apparently it's completely A-OK to start choking Aoi out of nowhere. I manage to look down at who it is. And before I pass out, I muttered, "Dang you, Hidan…"

* * *

"Mmmph…" I winced getting up. I poked my neck and scowled as much as I could; there were probably even more bruises decorating my already bruised neck. Wonderful. Joy. And other words laced heavily with sarcasm added themselves to my list as I looked up at Hikari.

"So what happened?"

"Uhm… I kinda forgot to tell Hidan that you were cosplaying as Hinata, so…" her voiced trailed off, nervous laughter taking its place.

"So what sorta cover story did you use?" Hikari blinked. It wasn't this often that I'd actually said something legitimate.

"He's your cousin, Hikaru. From New York. Actually, he's at table 8 right now. Go check on 'em, please."

I sighed, once more putting up my Hinata façade.

"H-How may I help you?" I asked, looking at him nervously.

"What the !&%!, Aoi?" he demanded. I sighed, leaning in a bit to angrily yell at him in a hushed whisper.

"Shuddap, Hidan. It's my job, and I'd like to keep it, if that's alright with you." I move away, switching back to Hinata.

"W-What would you like to order?"

"Oi! Hinata-chan!" Cue in nervous looks and blush. I turned around; it was 'Naruto.'

"N-Naruto-kun!" he slung an arm around my shoulder, about to steer me away before noticing Hidan.

"Eh? Who's this, Aoi?" he asked, looking at me. He chose to speak in his normal voice, which was much lower than that he used for 'Naruto.'

"My cousin, _Hikaru_." I said, stressing the "Hikaru" a bit more than needed.

"He looks a lot like Hida-"

"His name's Hikaru, Sam." I cut him off.

"But he looks like-"

"Hikaru." I add a bit more malice than needed, before switching back to Hinata.

"A-ah, Naruto-kun. W-What did you need me for?" I started blushing a lot more. Sam blinked, before understanding that the conversation was O-V-E-R.

"Hinata-chan, we've been requested!" he said, pulling my hand towards a table at the opposite end of the giant room. Which brings up the question, where did all this space come from? The building itself isn't that big. Hmm…

A couple hours later, getting more towards the end of my shift, I noticed Hidan surrounded by a bunch of chicks. No, not the little baby chickens that were as cute as heck, but chicks, as in those busty scantily clad bimbos that you'd think only existed in fanfictions/movies. When'd they get in? Meh. Calm, calm, calm, TURTLE!!

This job is really taxing for me. Portraying quiet, shy Hinata isn't the easiest thing for me to do. As if I hadn't mentioned that a hundred thousand times. But Boss believes in me, so I'll have to try my best.

"Hina-chan, another set of omurice, table 4!"

"Hai, Kiba-kun!" Carefully balancing the tray, I walked over to the table, passing by Hidan on the way. And I tripped over one of the bimbo's conveniently placed legs. Poor Omurice.

* * *

-:-End Chapter-:-

Meh, I'm running out of ideas *insert sad face*

Is there no one out there willing to offer juicy tidbits of creative help?

*dies*

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan


	22. Work the Second and Don't hate me, too

Surprise Guests 22

-:-Storeh Start-:-

* * *

Like mentioned before, Poor Omurice. Because of that brainless bimbo, all that fluffy omelets-rice goodness was now sprawled out on the floor. And when food's on the floor, it's not good. Nope, no good at all.

The plate had shattered once it contacted the ground. The many little pieces were everywhere, translating to a pain in the butt to clean up. Great…

"Aah! Hinata-chan! Are you okay?" 'Naruto' came over with a broom and dustpan to clean things up. I picked up all of the bigger pieces with my hands and dumped them into a paper bag.

"I-itai…" Of course, I had managed to cut myself when dumping the stuff. Blood oozed out of the cuts on my fingers. Eheheh… now it's starting to sting a bit.

"Ao-" whatever Hidan was about to say, he got interrupted.

"Hinata-chan!" Naruto was already there, holding my hand as if examining it. "_Genki desuka_? Are you okay?"

"_G-genki desu_. I-I'm fine. No need to worry, Naruto-kun." I inwardly sigh at myself once again. Man, is this girl stupid. My hand was going all stingy-stingy-throbby on my, and let me tell you, it's not fun. Now the blood was starting to drip a lot more. It would get my jacket dirty. And blood is hard to get out of any kind of cloth. Except for oil cloth. Oilcloth is practically liquid-proof.

"N-Naruto-kun! You're going to get all dirty!" It was true, the blood was now dripping onto his hand, which was still wrapped around my wrist.

"It's okay," he said, bringing my hand closer to his mouth. Wait- he's not gonna-

He did. He lapped up the blood. So I responded like how Hinata would. I fainted. I bet all the NaruHina fans out there are squealing in _freaking joy_ by now.

* * *

A familiar-looking pink-haired 'kunoichi' bonked her 'teammate' on the head.

"Look what happened, BAKA!" She yelled at him while binding up the limp 'Hinata's' injured hand.

What both of these 'shinobi' failed to notice was the fact that 'Hikaru' was getting peeved. But why would they care about that, anyways?

"Sakura-chaan, why'd ya do that?" he whined, tending to the giant lump on his head.

"Baka, it's your fault Hinata's like this." She scolded him, just about finished tending to the wound. 'Hinata' stirred, moving around a bit.

"Mm…" She opened her contact-made lavender eyes, only to gasp since 'Naruto's' face was in such close proximity.

"N-Naruto-kun!"

"Baka, stop that." 'Sakura' pushed the two apart before helping 'Hinata' up.

"Mm, I'm fine." She rubbed her eyes a bit, being careful as not to move the contacts too much.

"S-Should we clean up?"

* * *

-:-Aoi POV-:-

"What the heck was that for?!?" I managed to yell in a hushed whisper. We were in the kitchen getting some dishes and whatnot.

"What? I thought it was a good idea!" Sam replied, a guilty look creeping onto his face.

"Good idea my foot!" I pinched him, hard. "Don't do anything like that again, baka! Do you know how hard it is to faint on demand?" I walked out, switching to Hinata once I left past those doors. I double-checked the orders in my head while walking over to table 8.

"H-here's you're order." I plopped down the drinks, staring at the bimbos. How much foods and liquids could one bimbo body hold? Apparently the answer's a lot, if I'm one to judge based on these trays full of drinks and snacks I have to carry. I carefully place them on the table, keeping track of what's on the table for the receipt. I hope these chicks know that Hidan doesn't, and probably will never, have any money on him. At least, not money from this world.

"Could I have another one, girly?" I twitched. Girly? How did these bimbos even get in here, anyways? It's like some poorly written fanfiction plot because the writer's running out of ideas or something like that.

We're in a COSPLAY Café, for Pete's sake. How would they even get in? Do they have some sorta radar built into their Barbie heads? Maybe a "Ken-Finder-3000" or something along those lines, huh.

I could tell she was more than just a little drunk, which was weird. We don't serve any alcohol here. And we don't allow anything of that sort, either. So where'd she get it from? I wonder…

"H-Hai!" The empty glass goes onto the tray, and I hurry back to the kitchen.

"Sam!" I would've yelled at him, but then they would be able to hear it outside. "Take care of those bimbos, I think they're drunk or something."

"Yeah, yeah." He said, giving me a mock salute. "I'm on it, princess." And with that, he whisked himself out of the room.

Those bimbos should leave. I saw that some of the people seated at the neighboring tables were more than a bit uncomfortable with them. Talk about damaging the business. We usually don't get that kind of people around here. Sure, you have to expect some every once in a while, but still. Whenever they come, it always equals a pain in the tush. Grabbing a tray headed for table 7, I exit the kitchen.

"Here y-you go," I stuttered a bit, just like Hinata would. Their food went to the table, and so did the drinks.

"Hinata-chan!" one of the girls at the table said. She looked like she was up to no good. Well, a lot of these girls were, but that's not really the point here.

"H-hai?" I smiled a bit despite that.

"We wanna see more 'action' between you and Naruto-kun over there." The girl next to her demanded, emphasizing her point with air-quotes. One of her friends started doing "kissy-kissy" motions with her hands. I would normally answer with a quick, "ahahaha… no." but this is supposed to Hinata. I felt my face heat up voluntarily.

"E-Eh? G-gomen, b-but we c-can't do that k-kinda s-stuff." Hurriedly, I bowed a bit, before turning around, just to bump into…

"A-ah! N-Naruto-kun!" I blushed.

"Hm, Hina-chan?" he was clueless, that immature little brat.

"Speak of the devil."

"C'mon, kiss her!" the girls chanted, cheering. Were they really that much of NaruHina fans? Although we cosplayed a lot, this would have to be only the fifth time something like this had happened. But those other five times, it had been someone else. Never me. I wonder how everyone else took care of this…

Lost in my thoughts, I was caught completely off guard when he kissed me.

* * *

-:-Chappie End-:-

A/N: 1,000+ words

See what happens when I don't get any inspiration? DX

Yush, bad stuff happens. :P [but I'll make up for it]

And now, what else? I'm sure you smart peoples out there have ideas for me. Chuck 'em at me. Whether you just want more fluff or you want less, chuck 'em at me. :D *gets shot*

[don't worry, I won't die from a simple bullet]

I may have to resort to a giant time skip of about… a couple months. And trust me, a lot can happen in just two months.

* * *

On a different note,

Remember to ignore me if I ever actually say my plots out loud.

Because, trust me, these storehs write themselves, if you know what I mean.

Don't hate me. *dodges all the stuff being thrown*

Ja ne, S1SKA


	23. Work the Third and Disinfecting

Surprise Guests 23

Recap_: Lost in my thoughts, I was caught completely off guard when he kissed me._

By now, I bet it's safe to assume that I don't own Naruto. Movin' on…

* * *

-:-Storeh Start, plz-:-

Lavender eyes opened in surprise. Red spread across her face like a flame to paper.

Now, normally, she would've had him offa her half a second. But her training took over, and she forced herself not to kill him. At least, not yet. He broke the kiss, staring into her lavender eyes. A slight twitch of the eye told him what was coming, but for now, she fell into a dead faint. He caught her before she fell, though, so now she was leaning against him.

None of them noticed the crushed soda can lying at the feet of the immortal Jashinist, his fists clenched tightly as he was trying not to sacrifice anyone. He still didn't know the reason behind his anger, he only knew that it would always have to something with the girl. Why was it always her? But, it's not like anyone else was actually paying attention to him. Even all the bimbos around him were laughing at the two kissing.

The only one they were paying attention to was the girl, hanging limply in the blonde's arms. There was a light blush still spread out an the girl's face, despite the lack of any sign of life. 'Naruto' had her in his arms bridal style. Without so much as a grunt, he carried her over to the staff room, dumping her unceremoniously onto the sofa. Despite all this, she still didn't wake up, only moving around a bit when on the sofa.

Sam, on the other hand, wanted to get out of there ASAP. I think we all know why. Let's all hope Aoi doesn't catch up to him anytime soon.

* * *

Aoi pov?

I winced; it was really bright in the staff room. The staff room? What the- never mind, I remember now. I swear, I'll kill that Sam the next chance I get. But for now, it's the end of my shift and I'mma gonna get goin'. Hikari came into the room, already changed.

"You okay?" she asked. I smiled; she was always worried about me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just lemme go change, okay?"

"Sure." I slip into the changing room, managing to get off the outfit without damaging it. Same goes with the contacts, and I throw on my normal clothes and go back outside. We go out, grabbing Hidan along the way and headed back home.

Now, what should I cook for dinner tonight? Hm… I think I'll go Chinese! Chow fun and some fried rice and other fun crud. Me, being the oblivious person I was, never noticed the stares being directed toward my head during the entire car ride.

Going in the house, we were greeted by the normal people, the normal scene. Nothing out of the ordinary. I headed over to the kitchen, as my tummy was starting to remind me of its need for food. We already had all the ingredients for chow fun and fried rice. All that's left is ta cook it. By the time I stuck my head out of the fridge, my arms were stockpiled with enough food to feed a small army. Hey- that's basically what we've got here, isn't it? Well, they sure eat enough.

Turning around, I bump into- actually, I can't see who I bumped into. There's too much stuff in my hands. Well, of course I didn't hear anyone come over. They're [supposed to be] S-ranked shinobi. If a 14-year-old civilian girl can hear them coming into the kitchen, then that's just sad. Anyways, like I was saying, I bumped into someone. I'm surprised nothing fell out of my hands.

"Uh… could you move or something? I'm kinda carrying 'lotta stuff here." Just when I said that, the person got most of the stuff, carrying it to the counter.

"Thanks, Hidan."

"…" That was odd.

"Hiiiiidan," I started. What? It's fun to bug the poor guy. He froze- which, I have to admit, is kinda off. I poke him. "What's wrong with you? You're awfully quiet." I poke him again.

"It's… nothing." He sighed. Odd. He didn't doesn't seem like a "sigh-ing" type, does he?

"Psssshhhh…! 'tis isn't nothing. You're acting funneh, Hidan." I say, moving in front of him so that I could wave a finger in his face. And yes, I did say 'tis.

"… well, it's just that…" he seems wooooried.

"Just what?" I know for a fact that I almost never make things better. In fact, looking back on things, I just tend to make them worse, don't I?

"…about what happened …"

"Eh? What happened?" I'm kinda clueless here. Okay, more than a bit clueless. But you get the point, right?

"He kissed you, didn't he?"

"Erk. You saw that?" I said, adding in unnecessary yet somehow needed nervous laughter.

"Of course I saw that, I was right there!" He seemed pissed, like, more pissed than usual kind of pissed. I didn't really know how to respond, so…

"Uhm… Sorry?" Insert more nervous laughter here, please. What else were you supposed to say when someone asks you that, huh?

"…" instead of saying anything, he moved closer, using a finger to tilt my face up a bit.

"W-What are you doing?" I could feel my face heat up. He doesn't respond; his tongue snakes out, tracing my lips.

"Disinfecting it." He quickly turns around, walking away.

* * *

She stared after him, a hand covering her mouth as her mind attempted to comprehend what just happened. The blush slowly faded, and she eventually got back to cooking.

Hidan, however, is a completely different story. There was a heavy blush prominent on his pale skin as he dashed back up to his room, his thoughts running rampant through his head. He started beating himself up mentally, even banging his [actual] head against the wall a good couple of times. His thoughts went a little something like this:

"_What the ***** is *****ing disinfecting it? How the *****ing ****** could I be so lame_?" Then he started to ask himself why he even cared. This took some deep thought and soul-searching. [Hidan, soul-searching? Nah.]

And when he found out, well, let's save that for another chapter, shall we?

['tis teh end]

* * *

A/N: 1,000+ words

[because you all know how lazy I am]

I have almost the whole storeh planned out!! [not really]

I'm planning an actual CLIMAX SCENE!! Le gasp!

Review! S1ssy-chan LIVES off of reviews! [and manga and drawing and writing and her computer…]

Haven't said that in a while ^^

Ja ne, S1SKA


	24. Surprise Kiss

-[Surprise Guests Chapter 23]-

Recap: _And when he found out, well, let's save that for another chapter, shall we?_

Me no own Naruto. But I do own my OC's and plot and two Dei-chan posters and a wall scroll.

Since most of you will be reading this on a Monday, HAPPEH MONDAY!! Hope this has helped you peeps cheer up and what not. I know for a fact that updates always make ME happeh, so why not you peeps?

Warning: fluffeh stuff, I guess. *gets shot*

Anyways, read on.

* * *

-[Storeh START!]-

My fingers drum on the tabletop restlessly. What were we doing here again?

"What would you like to order?" Midori-nee-chan asks, holding up a notepad and a pen. Oh yeah, visiting Nee-chan at work. I ordered a fruit sandwich and green tea. Nummy.

Right now it was about half-way into summer vacation. Nee-chan had gotten her job about a week ago, and now wanted us to visit. The café was a quaint little place, albeit a bit on the tacky side. The color scheme would have to be pink, brown and crème. It's pretty, but I personally would prefer those colors in a bedroom, not a café.

I guess she wasn't expecting only a handful of us. Well, then again, since this is a couple-only café-thing, there can only be… four of us. Unless the other guys go in as a couple, but then it'd just be awkward, huh. [But I bet there's plenty of you fan girls out there who wouldn't really care.] Hikari was obviously with Itachi, whether he really wanted to or not. For some strange, unknown reason, the others decided to let me go with Hidan.

"_You should go with Hidan." Nee-chan said, after practically ordering us to come visit her at work._

"_Why Hidan?" I asked, confused. I cocked my head to the side. _

"_It's a couple-only café." Well, that's a new idea. Do they not let in one person, or how would it work?_

"_Besides, you're practically his girlfriend already, un." When I heard that, I burst out laughing. It took me a while to get enough breathe to talk._

"_Him? Get a girlfriend? Yeah right!" What? It's true. I can't imagine any girl with him at all._

"_You do know we were talking about you, hm?"He shut up with a knife [almost] to his head, though. Me? His girlfriend? Never…_

Yeah, that's kinda what happened, and why I'm here now. Hikari and Itachi had the table next to us, at least they seemed to enjoying themselves. Hikari looked like she was in heaven; Itachi looked like Itachi. What? It's not like that guy really shows any emotion or anything of that sort. I get the feeling you readers would rather get back to Hidan and me. Fine, give the readers what they want and all that crud, right?

In one word: Awkward. Ever since that time, Hidan's been acting weird. I don't know why at all. Today, he's even quieter, if possible. And I was bored. Just bored. Thus the drumming of the fingers.

"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiidan…." I say, stretching out his name. It's too quiet around here. He stares at me blankly. I stare back. We engage in a staring contest. And then I see something shiny.

…Dang, I just lost, didn't I?

"Piffle." Looking over to the side, I see that Hikari and Itachi seem to be enjoying themselves. There's not a trace of awkwardness between the two (unlike us). They're not acting like they were forced to come (unlike us). A slowly depleting plate of dango sits on the table (unlike us). Yum, dango. I lick my lips, hoping my food would come soon. The tell-tale clank of the plates on the table tells me that the food's here. Yatta!

"Enjoy your food, you two." Another waitress says, giving us a wink. "By the way, you two are a very cute couple." I twitch. What's with everyone saying that, hm? Luzzles, I sound like Deidara now. Looking over to Hidan, I'm surprised to see a blush decorating his pale face. Talking about pale, how do guys like him get such smooth pale skin? It's always something we girls dream about. The food's good, I like my sandwich. It's fruit… with crème and bread… Sounds simple, but very yummy. I wonder if I could make these myself…

* * *

-[Midori POV]-

While bringing over a plate of dango and croquettes to one of the table, I snuck a peek at my sister. I purposely invited them over and they spoil it. RUDE!

C'mon, it's obvious that the two like each other; they're just both as dense as lead. Of course, my sister would be even denser than Hidan, who's pretty bad already. So what else can a caring sister like me do besides play a bit of matchmaking? Hidan's practically head-over-heels in love with her by now. All of us can tell, except for the person in question. I think sometimes even Hidan knows that. Aoi, well, she's something else. At the best, she's oblivious. But if I play my cards right, this could work out quite well…

About halfway into their meal, I walk by, to make sure everything's okay. Aoi looks up, crème everywhere on her face. She waved to me, mouthing "Ganbatte!"

* * *

-[No POV]-

She nodded at the two before going to another table, all the while keeping an eye on them. Aoi was still eating her sandwich.

"Hey…" Hidan said, noticing the crème décor on her face. "You got some crème on your face…"

"Where? Where?" she asked, twisting her head around, and trying to lick it off with her tongue at the same time. As if you could see if something was on your face. Hidan sighed, pulling out a napkin. Carefully, as if cleaning a glass figurine, he wiped the crème off of her face. She smiled brightly, causing him to look away, his face burning.

"Sankyu, Hidan." And then she continued to eat, eventually getting more crème on her face. Which mean that what he did was pointless… Midori watched all this with satisfaction. All this needs is just one final push… She walked over to their table to 'check' on them.

"So how are things going, you two? Need any refills, dessert?" she asked all waitress-ly-like.

"No, we're fine." Aoi smiled at her sister; she could tell that something was up. She just couldn't put her finger on what.

"You sure? You two seem awfully bored." She set a hand on each of their heads.

"Nee-chan, what are you-" but before Aoi could even finish questioning her sister, she was interrupted by a pressure on the back of her head. Midori forced the two together in a kiss, watching with approval as both of their faces inflamed with red. By the time they realized what had happened, Midori had disappeared in a poof a smoke.

* * *

-[Aoi POV]-

I was getting suspicious. Nee-chan would only meaninglessly ask questions when she's planning something. And usually, when she's planning something, it's not a good something, if you know what I mean. Last time that happened it dyed Deidara's hair purple for at least a week. And then she put her hand on the back of my head, and the other on Hidan's. Now I was really apprehensive. So I decided to ask her.

"Nee-chan, what are you-" I couldn't even finish my sentence, as her hand shoved me into Hidan. And it just so happens that it's quite difficult to speak when someone's mouth is on yours, ya know?

_…waitjustadarntootin'moment…_

That means we just kissed, doesn't it?

* * *

-[and now, Hidan POV]-

Why was I even here? I kinda don't wanna be here, but then again, it's with Aoi… Ah… ******. It's just been getting weirder and weirder since I realized that I liked her. And it's not like anyone else was helping or anything. ******, it's too quiet here. The silence didn't improve after getting our food, nor did it improve when the waitress commented,

"By the way, you two are a very cute couple." I felt my face heat up at "couple." We don't exactly look like a couple, do we? **[A/N: well, maybe it's cuz you're at a COUPLE ONLY café, Hidan]** A long span of awkward silence later, I noticed that Aoi managed to get a bunch of that crème stuff all over her face.

"Hey… You've got crème on your face…" she seemed surprised, and looked around, trying to lick it off with her tongue. That obviously failed. I sighed, getting a napkin. I wiped it off. Who knew that those sandwiches had that much crème in them.

"Sankyu~" she said with a bright smile. In fact, it was so bright I had to look away. ******it, she's too *****ing cute…

"So how are things going, you two? Need any refills, dessert?" This time it was Midori as the waitress, not that random chick. My eyes narrowed slightly, I recognized that tone of voice. Last time we'd heard it, Deidara had this neon purple hair for at least a week.

"You sure? You two seem awfully bored." Her hands settled on our heads, confirming my suspicion.

"Nee-chan, what are you-" And with that, she pushed our heads so that our lips were pressed together. Holy…[censored]

* * *

-[Storeh end]-

Would that be double, or triple re-wind?

A/N 1,450+ words

*COUGH, COUGH, COUGH, COUGH* Enjoy the early update! :D

See? Reviews DO help! :D

…this just proves that I need to get a life, hm.

*gets shot*

But it does! All those reviews made me wanna work on the storeh, which somehow turned into this… AN ENTIRE CHAPTER.

Oh, and imagine Hidan saying, "Confound it!" in a british accent. :DDDD

*gets shot again*

…and I'm making Hidan act like a girl, aren't I? Oh well, it's a change of pace. Most fanfics have Hidan as a womanizer, luzzles.

Ja ne,

S1ssy-chan


	25. Deidei

-[Surprise Guests 25]-

Recap: …_**waitjustadarntootin'moment…**_

_That means we just kissed, doesn't it?_

_-:-_

_Holy…[censored]_

Disclaimer: Me no own! D: But enjoy, anyways.

* * *

-[Storeh START]-

Both had their eyes wide open, staring at each other in shock. What the ****** just happened? Midori kept her hands on their heads for a good long time, too. And then, just like that, with a ninja-like POOF! she was gone.

The moment Aoi noticed the absence of the pressure, she pulled away, looking around angrily for her sister. Of course, because of her ninja-like POOF, Midori was nowhere to be seen.

"Miiiiidoriiiii…" she was practically radiating those killer auras that are usually only seen in those animes or movies. But, alas, as fate would have it, she was to fall before she could take even one step. For, just as she brought her foot down on the ground, a baseball from the local game across the street came hurtling, breaking the window and smashing into her head.

She fell over into a dead faint, like usual. Unlike before though, she bonked her head rather hard on the table as she fell, giving herself a rather nasty bruise. Ouch.

Hidan was pulled from his thoughts by a rather loud THONK! He looked up to see Aoi on the floor. His left eye twitched noticeably.

"What the ***** just happened?"

* * *

-[Aoi POV]-

I cracked open my eyes, looking up at our living room ceiling. Living room ceiling?

"What happened?" I mumble, rubbing my eyes. Pulling myself up, I look around. "And what are all you people doing here?" I surrounded by almost all of us, the exceptions being Kakuzu and Zetsu, who frankly couldn't care less.

"Weren't we visiting Nee-chan?" I cocked my head to the side, thinking. "And then what happened? All I remember is the café… and dango… and something about purple flying ponies?" Midori tried to stifle a laugh, obviously failing.

"You don't remember?" Hidan asks, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Remember what? Did anything important happened? My mind's all a blur…" I trailed off, thinking.

"Never mind." He looked away hurriedly. What's wrong with him? Oh well, I wonder where… Uh-oh.

"Hey, nee-chaaan" I said kinda nervously.

"What is it?"

"Where's the cat?" Oh dear. Dei-dei seems to have disappeared again. She walked over to the basement and cracked open the door, but no blonde poof of fur. Next, Nee-chan tried banging his food dish a couple of times. Still no. Odd, usually that clanging noise would result in him bolting down the stairs, begging for food and annoying the heck out of me.

"Nee-chan…" I said, staring at a window, left wiiide open, definitely large enough even for a creature of such noble bulk like Dei-dei to get through. "Look" I pointed a finger.

And even better, it just started to rain. Wait… rain? 'Tis the middle of summer!

"Great, just great."

* * *

She grabbed a raincoat, fully intending to go outside despite the rain. She cracked open the door, a barrage of rain hitting her face. Aoi bit her lip before stepping outside, making sure to close the door behind her.

"Why's the cat so important to her, anyways?" Hidan looked over to Midori for the answer, who sighed. "She's practically killing the poor thing, and yet…"

"You really want to know?" She settled into the couch, hugging herself a bit. Looking up at the others, she saw the anticipation on their faces; they'd obviously wanted to know for a while.

"Dei-dei is basically the last thing alive connecting us to our family." She looked them straight in the face, obviously telling that she would say no more. At least, not for now. Getting up, she grabbed a raincoat and an umbrella before turning around to look at them.

"C'mon, we should go look for her, right?" Outside, the wind was blowing around crazily, making the rain hit everywhere, and just about everything. Midori sighed, looking outside and then back at them again.

"You coming? There should be raincoats in the closet." And with that, she stepped outside, shutting the door behind her.

* * *

"Dei-dei~!" Aoi called frantically. She was soaked to the bone, as apparently, her raincoat wasn't water-proof. But still, she had to find the cat.

"Nyaaaaa~" she whipped her head around, straining to hear where the source of the noise was. It was definitely a cat- but was it her cat?

"Dei!!" she cupped her hands to her face, calling out the cat's name. There! In an overturned trashcan was the soaked furball of a cat. It was all wet, and mewing like crazy.

"There you are, you stupid cat…" The kitty meowed in response, giving her a cat-pout when she tried to pick up the poor thing.

"Aoi!" called Midori, who came running after confirming that it was her sister. She held the umbrella over Aoi head, keeping the rain off of her already-drenched body.

"Look, Nee-chan." She smiled, holding up the kitty. "I found Dei-dei." And then her eyes rolled over, and she fell into a dead faint. Hidan, who was with Midori, caught her body. He gasped.

"She's burning up already." Hidan looked up at Midori, who nodded, walking away. He bent down a bit, carrying the limp girl in his arms before following after her.

* * *

"She's got a fever." Midori concluded after her doctor schemes. Aoi was tucked safely into her bed. Hidan twitched, trying to fight back the part of him that wanted to blurt out, "No ****, Sherlock." He sighed though, the common sense in him surprisingly winning the fight.

"But she should be fine. We've seen worse. Much worse." At that, Midori smiled a sad smile, full of such grief that it shocked everybody in the room. No, there wasn't just Hidan. Tobi and some other people were there too. _What… have these children gone through?_

The cat, being properly fed and dried off and everything climbed onto the bed, revving up his purr-motor. Aoi smiled in her sleep, stirring a bit but not yet waking up.

"After all, we only have each other left in this world." She stated it simply, getting out of her seat and walking out of the room. "There's no one else left for us. There's no one left but us…"

* * *

-[Storeh End]-

A/N: 1,000+ words

Is it just me, or are these chapters getting shorter? =w= Not intentional, I swear!

'Tis all part of the plot. :3

Enjoi?

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan


	26. Beach Parday

-[Surprise Guests 26]-

Recap: "There's no one else left for us. There's no one left but us…"

oh, and for this time 'round, the

* * *

are pov changes, in case you didn't notice. :D

-[Storeh START]-

I woke up, opening my eyes to see some worried people. But who cares about them. Where's Deidei? As if reading my mind, Dei lets out a loud mew, purring loudly.

"Oi," I say, petting his head. "You overgrown ball of fluff. Why'd you leave us, huh?" He mewed back, like I could actually understand him. Of course, though, I can't. It's not like I ever took Catonese classes or anything. [haha, get it? CATonese? Cantonese? … nevermind]

He purred, his little face practically glowing with kitty happiness. Somebody took the seat next to my bed. When'd we get a chair there? Whatever.

"You're okay, right?" Hidan asked. He looked worried. But why? After thinking on it for a bit, I come up with the conclusion that thinking when you're sick makes your head hurt. Not fun at all, I'm afraid.

"Yeah, I just need some rest." I smile, rolling around to face the wall. Within minutes, I'm fast asleep.

* * *

"Hey, what are you doing down here?" Midori asked as she walked down the stairs. Hidan was in the kitchen, staring grumpily at the pot.

"…nothing."

"Hey, is that food I see?" from where she was, she could already smell the soup.

Hidan twitched, looking off to the side, like a guilty child with a hand in the cookie jar.

"No." he insisted, much like a stubborn child.

Midori sighed at his hopelessness, stepping into the kitchen.

"It's for Aoi, isn't it," she said, plopping an elbow onto the kitchen counter. Hidan sighed, bowing in defeat.

"…yeah."

Midori propped up her face with her hands, looking at Hidan.

"You really like her, don't you?" Midori decided that now was not the time to mince words.

Hidan stared at her, slightly shocked. It at first looked like he was gonna protest, but, surprisingly, he didn't. By now, however, their attentions were diverted by the food. It was ready by now, so Hidan went to go prepare it, ignoring the all-knowing-stares from Midori.

He carried the tray upstairs, continuing to pay no heed to the gazes directed at him. Knocking on the door, he cracked it open to find Aoi already awake, and hungry, if one were to judge from the loud growl coming from her stomach. She was sitting upright in bed, her face still a bit flushed.

"Is that… for me?" she asked, tilting her head to the side.

"Yeah." Hidan felt his face heat up a bit when he saw how much Aoi's face brighted.

"Thanks!" with the tray on her lap, she began to dig in. It wasn't much- just some stew and bread- but it was good food. And she was happy.

When Aoi finished up the food, she sighed contently, patting her full stomach. Looking up at Hidan, she smiled once more.

"That was really good!"

"It wasn't anything special…" he muttered, purposely avoiding eye-contact.

"No, I still liked it. After all, I hardly get to eat food made by other people, just for me. It's a special treat." Aoi smiled yet again, this time much brighter than before. Hidan sighed, his face going even redder.

"Hm? What's wrong Hidan? Your face is all red!" her hand reached out, brushing against his forehead. Hidan's face, in response, erupted into flames.

"You're not sick, are you?" she was worried, gently pressing her forehead against his. Midori chose this time to enter the room.

"Aoi. You know, even if you did that, it doesn't really work?" she said dryly, crossing her arms. Aoi gasped, looking up at her sister.

"Why not?"

"You're sick too. Your temperature is out of whack."

"Ooooh." She frowned, puffing out her cheeks, crossing her arms. "I knew that."

* * *

[HOLY CRUD this is taking too long. Time-skip-no-jutsu! /is shot/]

"Are we there yet?" I asked, bored out of my mind. Today we were supposed to be going to the beach. Then why was the ten of us cramped into a 8-seater minivan? Yes, that's right. TEN of us.

"No. Shaddup." Nee-chan said. She was sitting on Tobi's lap, his arms around her waist as a human seat belt. Well, how else are we gonna fit all 10 of us when there's only room for 8 in the van. Of course, we duck whenever we see the cops. [**A/N: don't do this at home, kids**]

What? Me? Why do you people want to know?

"Hey, Hidan, you okay?" Nee-chan asked.

"Hm?"

"Because, me sister is heavier than me and all that stuff. Aren't your legs gonna fall asleep?"

"Oi! Shaddup!" I would've whacked her, but she's too far away. That, and I probably would've somehow managed to miss. And that would've ended up hitting poor Tobi.

"It's okay…" Hidan said, his arms tightening around me. Yeah, me gots human seatbelt too. Whut nao? Now, say, if Hikari got into some sort of major accident, at least I won't go flying through the windshield. Unless Mr. Ninja here doesn't have the super-ninja-grip that all ninja are supposed to have. If that's it, then I'm screwed. Well, Hikari's a good driver, so I should be okay.

Anyways, later.

"Yatta! The beach!" I said, taking in the landscape. Beautiful sparkling seas and a bright, clear day. Yush, yush, yush, I lurve the beach. I stick my feet into the warm sand, my flip flops already kicked off. I was about to run off into the water when a hand on my shoulder stopped me.

"Aoi," Nee-chan said menacingly, "You'd better help us unpack this stuff." I turn around, sighing with defeat. Hikari had somehow managed to fit not only all 10 of us into that van, but she squeezed enough beach supplies, including food, towels, and extra clothes, for 15. Well, we use alotta stuff and eat alotta food. What can you say, really.

Yeah, anyways, that's beside the point. After we unpacked and set up, I rushed towards the water. I love the ocean. So relaxing, and peaceful..

"TOBII! Let me down!" wait, never mind. It definitely ain't peaceful here. What you just heard was Midori yelling at Tobi, if you haven't figured that out already. Now, I know what you want to ask next. Why was she yelling at him? Well, that's easy to figure out.

Tobi decided that he wanted to go into the water. But, he didn't want to go alone. Nee-chan, on the other hand, has always preferred to stay out of the salty water. That, and she can't really swim that well. So, Tobi chose to pick her up, bridal style, and was now carrying her over the cold-looking [at least to her] sea water.

"C'mon, Nee-chan! The water's wonderful!" I shouted, waving. The others started entering the waters, with the exception of Kakuzu, who settled in underneath an umbrella with a book. Where'd he manage to find a book in Japanese? We've neglected teaching them English, half due to our laziness and the other half due to Nee-chan's and senpai's paranoia. Whatever, I'm not really caring.

I'm sure you people thought that Itachi would've sat out too, but Hikari forced him to come. Actually, Zetsu was off looking at some plants somewhere. I have no idea where that plant guy went.

Looking off to the shore, I spot something… it can't be…

* * *

"Have you seen Aoi?" Hidan asked worriedly.

"She said she'd be gone for a bit, right?" Midori yelled back. Despite having struggled earlier, she was currently playing a game of beach volleyball with the others… in the water. It made the game so much more interesting, especially when the ball started to float away…

"That was an hour ago."

* * *

A/N: 1,250+ words

The cliffies are BACK!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHH[hack, cough, cough, cough]

This chapter took too long… *dies*

Now review if you want me alive in time for next week's update.


	27. Yet more Stalkers

-[Surprise Guests 27]-

Recap: _"That was an hour ago."_

* * *

I blinked, not believing what I saw. What the heck is this place? _That liar…_ I thought darkly.

Currently, wherever the heck I am right now, is just a small room. I think the wall was white, judging from the scarce blank spot in between all the wall décor. It was kinda freaking me out, really.

I mean, come on, wouldn't you be scared if there was an ENTIRE FREAKING ROOM dedicated to you? Excuse the language, but that's really how I feel. And it's not just that. Besides the smaller pictures, this creep even blew them up to be poster-sized. I pretty sure that I'm not the only one who would be weirded out by a full four walls filled with pictures of yourself. Does this person even have a life?

* * *

"Well, crud." Midori said. They had already searched practically the entire beach, but there wasn't a single trace of her to be seen. "This is wonderful." Midori bit her lip, for some strange, unknown reason, she wasn't feeling too well. She was getting a mighty fierce headache.

"Are you okay?" Hikari asked, plainly worried. "You're getting pale."

"What are you talking about? I'm fi-nngh…" she gasped, her head suddenly exploded in pain, forcing her to collapse to the ground.

"Midori!" Tobi was at her side within the blink of an eye, peering at her anxiously through the single eyehole of his lollipop mask. Her eyes scrunched closed. When would this pain stop?

"A-Aoi?" Midori said, confused. It was as if she was seeing something, a vision. Madara frowned under the mask. It's not like he was worried or anything, but what the **** was wrong with that girl? And what was it exactly that she was seeing?

Slowly, the pain was going away. Midori struggled to get to her feet, trying, but not succeeding, to ignore the throbbing of her head. Tobi helped her up, pulling her up into his arms. Oddly enough, the bright neon orange of his mask was comforting, and the pain dulled a bit more.

"I think I know where Aoi is…" she managed to say. Hidan, with his super-Hidan-hearing-powers, heard this. He got reeeeally close, much too close for comfort.

"Where is she?" he pestered her continuously, until a one-eyed glare from [surprise!] Tobi shut him up. S-scary.

* * *

Maaan, oh maaan am I bored. I'm pretty sure that even the narcissistic of all narcissists would get tired of staring at themselves all day. Or maybe not, but still. I was bored out of my skull.

Oh wait, there's a door. Why didn't I see that before? No, I was not too busy admiring myself. That's just a bit off for me. Anyways, the door. It was a regular door, except it was pasted over with pictures. Joy. Joy to the whole dang world, and everyone in it.

Back to my emo corner, where I… emo'ed. Or angsted. Or whatever. I was just soooo boreeeed. Bringing my knees up to my chest, I just waited. And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Finally, the door creaked open, and I looked up. Slowly, the door opened. Slowly, the head revealed itself. …ew.

Who else would it be?

It was Kevin.

Dangitall, I knew my luck wasn't that good. I had managed to avoid him for most of the summer, but I had this naggy feeling that he would show up sooner or later. Wait, no, that was Midori. She told me that she had that naggy feeling. Whoops.

"Hey, Ohime-sama~" he said, moving uncomfortably closer and closer and closer. "I haven't seen you all summer." Ew… I backed away, only to hit the wall. I'd forgotten that I had been angsting in the corner of the room.

Now, I'm cornered. Not fun, not fun at all. How am I supposed to get out not? Ew… now he's close enough to touch me, which, by the way, he does. His fingers slowly trail up my leg, a perverted look on his face. Since we were at the beach, I'm wearing shorts and a t-shirt. Not fun.

I want to run, but I can't. For some reason, I'm frozen in place. Why can't I move?

"I've been waiting for a chance like this since forever…" He inches even closer. I press myself flat against the wall. But that's not far enough. No, far enough would have to be at least a mile away. But a lot of times, we don't get what we want. And now is one of those times for me.

Ew… I never want to see such an extreme close-up of his face again. I barely managed to push him off of me, but even if I ran for the door, it's locked. So I run to the opposite side of the room. Waaaay opposite. But me not fast enough. He grabbed my wrist, pinning me against the wall.

"Where are you going, Princess?" he said, completely enjoying this. Me, not so much. More like, not at all. I'm too busy being scared out of my mind to pay attention to stuff like that. The iron grip on my hands is too strong; I can't move at all. There's no way I can escape, and he's just getting closer.

"H-Hidan…" I call out, tears threatening to spill.. Why'd I call out for him, though? He was just the first one to pop up, but…

As in cue, a fist sweeps in, punching Kevin in the face.

"[bleep]ing [bleep]" he yelled at him, giving him another kick for good measure, before turning to me. I can't help it- the tears I've been holding back spill over.

* * *

"Should we help?" Tobi asked, peering into the room. Midori was fine by now, albeit a bit confused as what had happened.

"No, they'll be fine." Midori waved them off. "I think he'd be good for her. Aoi just needs to realize it." She needs someone strong enough to support her when she's down. And they're both idiots, together they can be idiots in love. She kept those thoughts to herself, though.

Aoi was sobbing into Hidan's shirt, still traumatized. He was rubbing her back, trying to calm her down somewhat. When she stopped crying, he decided that it was well time to take care of that stalker once and for all. Hidan got up, cracking his knuckles, somehow managing to emit a dark aura.

"You [bleep]ing [bleep]!" kick, kick. In between the cusses, Hidan managed [this _is_ Hidan we're talking about] to fit in quite a bit of punches and kicks. "Don't you [bleep]ing dare to [bleeeeeeepbleepbleep(x50)] come near her again!"

He looked up at the sky, annoyed. "What the [bleep] is with this [bleep]ing excuse of a [bleep]ing censor is this?!"

Up in the land where writers play God, S1ssy-chan looks down, annoyed. "Fine, fine, Hidan."

"*****, that's more like it." he was about to whack that perverted excuse of a teen a couple more times, but Aoi stopped him.

"Hi(hiccup)dan, if you hit him anymore, he'll die." She frowned at him, her lips forming a pout.

"Well, Jashin needs some new *****ing sacrifices, *****." Aoi frowned even more, whacking him lightly with a balled fist.

"You can't kill anyone. And no swearing, Hidan."

* * *

A/N: 1,150+words

Because I felt like leaving it off there, h'm. Hey, at least it ain't a cliffy.

And now, S1ssy-chan needs somw sleeeep.

'tis almost 1am. Be happy, guys.

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan~


	28. Bowling

-[Surprise Guests 28]-

For once, I don't really have anything to put here. Weird. Wait, I do. No wait again, I'mma gonna put that in the back.

* * *

-[Storeh Start]-

"Aoi," Midori said after the whole ordeal. They were currently driving back home. "How'd you even end up in there, anyways?"

"Ehehehe…" she laughed nervously, scratching the back of her head. "Well… you see…"

"It better not be the same as last time." Midori crossed her arms. Aoi puffed her cheeks out, looking the other way.

"It's not the same! …totally…" Midori sighed, facepalming.

"I knew it…" she looked over to her sister, her green eyes gentle. "Don't scare us like that again, okay? We were worried."

"Okie."

"So what happened…?" Hidan asked. Midori coughed, looking at her sister expectantly. Aoi suddenly found the ceiling of the van veery interesting.

"Aoi…" Midori said warningly. Aoi pouted, mumbling incoherent words.

"B-but the guy said t-that he knew h-how to get to RAINBOW LAND!" she finally blurted out, almost falling off of Hidan's lap.

"…Rainbow land?"

"Yeah," she nodded eagerly, "Rainbow land! The land of the magical purple flying ponies and where the marshmallow bunnies poop rainbows!"

"…"

* * *

"Tobi," Midori said, crossing her arms. "You're not coming."

"Why noooooot?" the boy cried, throwing his arms around her, and rubbing her head much like a cat would.

"How many times have I told you?" she peeled him off of herself before continuing. "It's your stupid mask."

"Then how's this?" A quick hand seal and a poof of smoke later, a rather handsome youth looked back at her. He still had his short spiky hair, and a bandage covered his left eye. Other than that, he looked exactly like Midori's manself. Midori rolled her eyes, but agreed reluctantly.

"Yaaaaay~" he said, grabbing her hand, swinging it back and forth.

"Wait, why could Tobi wear his mask at the beach?" he tilted his head to the side, genuinely confused.

"It's not like anyone would go there, anyways." She said, shrugging.

"Why not?" he tilted his head to the other side.

"It's a private beach. There shouldn't be anyone else."

"…but Tobi's a good boy, right?"

"Yeah, yeah."

"You three," she said, pointing at Zetsu, Kisame, and Kakuzu. "If you wanna come, You gotta do something like Tobi." He stepped out from behind her, causing several people to gasp.

"Is that what Tobi really looks like?" Aoi asked, already in his face and pulling his cheek. "Wait, he looks just like me!"

"Tobi used genjutsu~" he said, pinching Aoi's face back.

"So if you guys use it too, you can come," Midori said, pointing at Kisame, Zetsu and Kakuzu.

"Not going." Kakuzu went back upstairs. Aoi pouted.

"Party pooper."

"**Not going either."**

"Party Poopier." She pouted again. Midori turned around to Kisame, crossing her arms expectantly.

"You. Henge. Now." Poof, there stands a tanned, non shark Kisame with blonde hair and normal eyes.

"Heeey, Sharki looks like a surfer! Hang ten, dude!"

* * *

"The rules are simple. Just roll the ball and try to hit the pins. You guys are shinobi, you should be fine. Watch Aoi, but I'd suggest that you don't follow her form."

"Hey," I said, annoyed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You bowl like a granny."

"So what? At least it works." I stepped up to the land, holding the heavy ball in my hands. Bending over, I bring it as far back behind my legs it can go, before catapulting it out.

"We don't need to see that much of your tush." Midori said from her seat. I stick my tongue at her, the board announces a strike.

"What nao?" I laugh, settling into an empty seat. Hikari goes next. She has the right form and everything, and gets a spare.

"So yeah, follow Hikari, and not Aoi." Midori says, getting up. She ends up getting a 3 and a 4 for a total of 7. Oooh, I'm being so statistical.

Itachi's next, being prompted by Hikari. I swear, if those two aren't going out, then bunnies can poop rainbows. What? It's true.

Itachi bowls in a way that is… very Itachi-like. Very smooth and graceful, like a swan or some other elegant beast. What else would you expect from the emo-prince? Wait, no, that's Sas-Gay. Never mind that.

Next is Kisame. I've still to get used to his "normal" form. He struts up, looking all "cool." He thinks that this is gonna be easy… but it's not. Bang! Gutter ball! I crack up.

"Not that easy, is it?" He frowns, and tries again… 1 pin down! I applaud like a crazy idiot mom with her son just barely managing to touch the ball in the field.

"What? It's an improvement."

And the game continues. Soon, we're in the last round, and it starts getting very noisy. Well, it's always been noisy, what with this group. But then it started getting not only louder, but… more colorful, too.

"WHAT'S WITH THIS *******ING BALL??" as you can see, Hidan wasn't exactly getting the best of luck. I think his total score was 18 so far. What a poor, poor soul. Even Kisame has at least 50-something points.

"Ne, ne, Mi-chan~" Hikari said, using that nickname that Midori absolutely hated. She twitched, but reluctantly responded.

"What…"

"Aren't we gonna be kicked out?"

"Normally, yes." I would have to agree with Nee-chan on that one. I mean, come on, bowling alleys are public places with little kids. And here we have Hidan belting out the lyrics to "A-B-C why won't you swear with me." I'm not sure about you, but that seems mighty suspicious, no?

"Normally?" Tobi chooses now to stick his head into our conversation, tilting his cute little head to the side.

"We're… considered as special guests here, for various reasons." Nee-chan chooses her words carefully, deliberately.

"Tobi's a good boy!" who else? Tobi said, throwing his arms around Nee-chan. Way to keep up the mood, Tobi.

"Awwww, how cute…" I say tilting my head with a hand on my face. I say that to just about everything. Why? …I dunno…

One of the employees has been staring at us nervously for quite some time. Her brown eyes have been following us. It was quite obvious by the way she was standing that she had something urgent to tell us, but didn't want to intrude in our conversation. I tugged at Nee-chan's sleeve.

"T-Toshima-sama!" she said, bowing hurriedly. By now, our entire group had stopped, and was staring back at her. Poor girl.

"Yes?" Midori asked. She was more used to this than I would ever be.

"T-There's an i-important e-emergency!" Great gravy, she reminds me of when I have to roleplay as Hinata. Girl needs some backbone.

"I-It's your Grandfather! He's in the hospital!"

* * *

-[end chappie]-

A/N: 1,100+ words

Gaah, finally got that over with.

Oh yush, Christmas ish coming closer and closer. So… as a gift to all my readers,

Attached to the next chapter will be a Q-and-A session with my 2 OC's, Aoi and Midori. You can ask them almost anything! [whether or not you get an answer, however, is a completely different story]

It would be better if whatever you ask doesn't really have to do with the story/plot. Examples of those would be like, "What happened to your parents" or "Why don't you visit your grandpa" because those are some of the key points, h'm.

Make sure to specify which question's for who, h'm.

And on another note, I've almost hit 200 reviews! C'mon, let's make this work, peoples! Hit that button like no tomorrow!

Remember that all reviews, both signed and anonymous, are accepted.

Is that all? =w= me out, then

Ja ne, S1SKA


	29. HoSPITals

-[Surprise Guests 29]-

Recap: _"I-It's your Grandfather! He's in the hospital!"_

* * *

-[Chapter Start?]-

Oh dear. This looks like this is gonna be a problem. I look over a Nee-chan, who's already calculating something in her head.

"Which hospital is it?" she asks, looking up. I'm worried, but I'm still paying attention. Because, I am awesome like that and can multitask… wait, I'm getting out of hand.

After getting directions, we all pile into the car and head out. Midori's obviously anxious, her foot twitching crazily.

"I think we can only afford to bring in two of you," she says, addressing everyone in the car. "It'll be too much trouble." Digging through our bags, Nee-chan manages to find several pairs of sunglasses and a couple hats. She hands a set to me before looking up at the others.

"So who's going?" she said, mainly looking Hidan and Tobi. I've still to get used to Tobi and his new… look, so to speak. As for Hidan, he's started to gel his hair less and less. Which reminds me, what did he use to slick back his hair in the other world? I'm pretty sure that they didn't have hair gel…

Man, I get distracted too easily. I slip the sunglasses over my eyes and put on the hat, pulling the brim of it low. Nee-chan does the same. Now you wouldn't be able to tell us apart at all. I guess that Hidan and Tobi are the ones who are coming, since they're the only ones who took the sunglasses.

"You can just drop us of towards the back. I think it'd better if we walked."

"What exactly is going on?" Hikari asks, confused. "What's all that stuff for? What aren't you guys telling me?"

"…" I look over at Nee-chan once again, ready to follow her lead. She's almost always the one who decides everything in the end.

"We'll tell you later, okay?" Midori smiled reassuringly. If only I could do so.

"It's not like we didn't want to tell you, it's just that we didn't' really get the chance to tell you. Oh look, we're here."

"You can just drop us off and leave, Hikari-chan." Midori remembers to add. "We'll get a ride, okay?"

"…Okay…" she agrees reluctantly, taking the van around to the back of the building.

The hospital was a huge building, definitely at least a good 5 stories tall. Its large windows probably gave the patients a wonderful view of the busy crowded streets. Giant golden letters on top of the door stated plainly who owned this magnificent building, the TOSHIMA Co.

"This is gonna be a pain in the tush." I say, stepping out of the car. There's a lot of people swarming the front of the building, and probably all over the inside of it, too. They carried cameras, the looks on their faces eager for rumors and other juicy tidbits. I shivered in disgust. I absolutely _hate_ reporters.

Together, the four of us manage to push our way to the front of the crowd, where the security guards are trying their best to keep the crazed reporters out. Sure, they aren't allowed past a certain point, but that didn't seem to slow them down. Even though there was a lot of guards, they still had a problem containing the crowd.

Midori catches the attention of one of the guards, flashing her ID at them.

"My sister and I also have a couple of friends, okay?" she says, lowering her sunglasses a bit to look at the guard with her emerald eyes. She gives him a steely glare.

"R-right , Miss," he stammers, letting us through. The reporters rebelled, probably wondering who the heck we were, and why we were allowed inside. Flashes go off, making me roll my eyes. Thank all that is holy for the sunglasses and hats. An attendant walked with us, telling us the room number right before we step into the elevator.

"They are so annoying," I say when we're in the elevator. Looking over at Hidan and Tobi, I add, "You guys are okay, right?"

"What the **** was that?" Hidan said, furrowing his eyebrows together even more. I frowned, poking his forehead, right between his eyebrows.

"Don't do that, you'll get all wrinkly when you're oooold. And people will pay millions to see Hidan the raisin. And all that money will go into my bank account, and I'll live happily ever after with some random fairy-tale prince." I nodded my head in agreement with my own logic, crossing my arms. Of course, I don't notice Hidan blushing or anything like that. I'm not that smart, didn't you guys already know that?

"Aaanyways," Nee-chan said, just as the elevator door opened. "Let's get moving." She walks on unfalteringly, even though people left and right stop in their tracks to bow hurriedly when they recognized who we are. How they manage to recognize us is a mystery, seeing how we still have the sunglasses on and whatnot. As for me, I try my best to catch up. Nee-chan walks too fast for me, and I am sooo not used to having a kajillion people bowing to me. Way too much of a pain in the tush.

Yet another attendant joins us, this time leading us to what seems like the biggest room in the hospital. More X-Large windows fill up one of the walls, allowing whichever patient that's rich enough to stay in such a luxurious hospital room a great view of the crowded streets. And today, that particular patient was my grandfather. He was lying in the large, comfy-looking bed, his eyes closed as he slept.

Heck, this hospital room looked more like hotel room than anything else. It even included a small, but hi-tech kitchen. And then there was plenty of other things, like the hospital equipment and then a couple of armchairs and a coffee table. I bet that if I checked the bathroom, it'd come with a jacuzzi.

"Oh, Midori," someone said. I tensed- I sooo did not need to see her right now. "And is that Aoi? I haven't seen you in ages!" Hidan was standing right behind me, and his grip on my shoulder tensed.

* * *

-[Chapter EEEND]-

A/N: 1,000+ words

We're getting somewhere, finally...

Oh, does anyone have any good name ideas? The she-devil needs a name. Chuck'em at me, I don't bite… much.

And as for the question things, I'm surprised that only two people asked. Tsk, tsk, tsk. I'm not sure if I can manage another chapter, I want to update my other stories first. Anyways, onwards.

* * *

Q 1: from **Deidara-kunisMine**

"_**OOH! QUESTIONS! I want to ask Aoi a question! Ahem, Aoi-chan, when did  
Kevin-teme/baka first start stalking you? And what was your first reaction?"**_

**Aoi:** It was just a normal day at school, in second grade…

_"Class, today we have a new student." The teacher pushed a small child with glasses up toward the front. It was obvious that he was nervous, his little knees were shaking._

_ "I-I'm K-Kevin…" he said, giant tears forming in his big eyes. _

_ "Good job Kevin, now go take a seat next to Aoi-chan over there." I smiled, hearing my name. He took the seat next to me, and I, being the stupid girl I was, decided to talk to him._

_ "You're Kevin, right? I'm Aoi." _

Oh, was I a stupid child. Because of that one act of kindness, he started following me around school.

"_Nee-chan…" I said, tugging at her jacket. The 4__th__-grade Midori looks at me, mildly amused._

"_What is it?"_

"_I-I keep on getting this feeling that someone's following me…" _

So yeah, that was how it all started. And then it's only gotten worse…

Q2: from **Megzie-chan**

"_**Hm...a question for them eh? Can I be really naughty with a question and  
ask...say...Aoi-chan what Hidan tastes like? ...Coz I'm curious...and  
perverted right now... :)"**_

**Aoi: ** Eeeh? Whaddya mean like that? I don't get it… (clueless)

* * *

AAAnd, that's a wrap, since nobody else bothered to send in any questions. I'll try this again… later. :3

Is that all? I may/may not update again next week, because I kinda wanna try to update my other stories, some which have been long-forgotten…

Is that all? Annyways, have a [early] MEEERRRY CHRISTMAAS!!


	30. SPIThoals

-[Surprise Guests 30]-

Le gaspe~! I've just hit 30 CHAPTERS!! Whut nao?

Recap: _"Oh, Midori," someone said. I tensed- I sooo did not need to see her right now. "And is that Aoi? I haven't seen you in ages!" Hidan was standing right behind me, and his grip on my shoulder tensed._

* * *

-[storeh start-o]-

I turned around, inwardly cringing. Maybe outwardly, too, but I'm not so sure about that… I could hear the click-clack of her high-heels against the tile floor as I slowly turned around to greet her.

"…Yeah, it's been a while, hasn't it?" I manage to force a pretty fake-looking smile. I was surprised that she took that smile. Then again, I've never really smiled in front of her.

Just like I remembered last time, she still wore her 4-inch heels as well as the striped suit that only made her toothpick limbs even skinnier. And her hair, which was dyed a bright eye-blinding red, was pulled into its usual cruel bun, sitting painfully at the top of her head. Not a single strand of her hair fell out of place, just like it always was. She was still the same woman I'd always hated.

To my displeasure, she gets uncomfortably closer and closer, finally slinging an arm around my shoulders. Midori ignores my silent pleas for help, instead walking over to where my grandfather was lying in the bed. She sat down in the stool conveniently placed by his bedside. Although I haven't seen him in a long while, I still don't ever recall him being that skinny.

Slipping out from her stick-thin arms, I walked over next to Midori, trying to mentally erase the feelings of her arms around mines. Which, in case you were wondering, did not work very well.

"How is he?" Midori asked, her question directed towards no one in particular. All of a sudden, a nurse, decked out in the usual nurse outfit, came in, bowing deeply. Again with the bowing. It hasn't even been an hour and I'm already sick and tired with this.

"Toshima-dono," she said, looking at her professional-looking clipboard. Why do all the nurses get the cool looking clipboards? I want one too… "Is recovering slowly. He should be able to be discharged within two week's time."

We both let out a sigh of relief. I sat down on the stool the magically appeared next to Midori. It's the magic of the hospital sprites, I tell you.

Looking back at the two boys we brought with us, I noticed one thing. They looked awfully out of place in that corner of theirs.

"Oh, and what do we have here?" Uh-oh. The she-devil's spotted them. Good luck, you two. No, really, they'll need it before she's halfway through with them. She has this way of tiring people out endlessly with her infinite chatter as well as those insensitive questions that she figures out how to ask with her sharp eyes.

And yet she never seemed to realize that I, um, kinda hate her guts.

But that's beside the point.

"Who are these two?" she asks, gesturing towards them.

"They're our friends," Midori says, getting up. "That one's Tobi, and this guy here's Hikaru."

"It's odd of you to bring friends over, let alone _guy_ friends." No, she didn't say gay. She said guy. And she also emphasized guy, too.

"Like I said earlier," Midori's obviously trying to hold back the urge to pound her face in, yet she's keeping such a calm face. Wait, never mind, that's just me wanting to, ahem, crush her head in. "They're our friends. And they're worried too."

"So they're not your _boy_friends or anything like that?" she said, an odd look on her face. If I was had been drinking anything, it would have been long gone into her face by now. Stupid she-devil and her stupid questions.

Which brings me to another point. Why do people always think that me and Hidan are going out? It's, in reality, nothing of the sort. So what's with them and their thinking? Do we look like a couple or something? I pout.

"No." Ahh… I admire my sister and her poker-faced abilities.

* * *

Back at home, due to the stupidity of the poor writer over here, and a sorta-writer's block. Poor S1ssy-chan can't prolong the hospital scene any longer. So yes, back at home.

And Hikari, surprisingly, wasn't there. Of course, she left a Post-It note hanging from the ceiling. I made Hidan get it for me, seeing how I'm too short to reach it. In her messy but legible handwriting, Hikari made it clear that she wanted to know what was going on, but decided to save it for next time. Or, in her exact words,

"_I gotta go, so tell me later, 'kay? ~Hikari"_

My dear sister was off to her/our room for who knows what. I wouldn't know, I'm not her. I may look like her, but I'm not her. Tobi hops up the stairs, following her like a lost little puppy.

Aaaanyways, that's beside the point here. The point of this particular scene in this specific time and place is…

In reality, I don't know. But you know what? I never seem to understand what's happening. I guess that's what people mean when they say that I'm slow. My lovely sister and her noisy companion interrupt my thoughts as they come downstairs, Tobi prattling his head off about nothing in particular. Because Tobi is Tobi, and Tobi never talks about anything important. Which means you can just tune him out as you please.

"You didn't notice?" Hidan said, spooking the bejeebers out of me. He was right behind me, his arms crossed.

"Woah! When you'd get there?" He, in response, simply rolled his eyes at me.

"I was always here." I just looked at him weirdly.

"That's creepy. Anyways, what were you saying?" I quickly changed the subject with my wonderful gift of randomness. Of course nobody paid any attention to me.

"Tobi noticed it too!" the happy-go-lucky child raised his hands, holding them high in the air.

"What?" Midori was shocked for some reason.

"She-devil's not from this world!" Tobi said happily, as if thanking someone for some candy.

"Or, to be more specific, she's from our world." Hidan said, leaning against the wall.

* * *

-[the end]-

1,000+ words

Gosh, this one took forever~

*dodges all the random crud being thrown*

Yeah, let's hope I can get back to my update-every-week schedule.

And besides this one, which of my other stories is your favorite?

Blind Eyes?

Akatsuki High?

Grass is Always Greener?

Sold? [Though I took that one down]

Z2?

Or, more like, which one would you like me to work on more?

… I should make a poll for this one, huh. Never mind then.

Oh, and

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SLEEE!!! Pt 2

Ja ne, S1ssy-chan :3


	31. Kaaaaa

-[Surprise Guests 31]-

Recap: _"Or, to be more specific, she's from our world." Hidan said, leaning against the wall._

* * *

-[Storeh ish the starting]-

Midori leaned against a different wall, narrowing her eyes.

"How would you know?" she questioned harshly, using her special mess-with-me-or-die voice.

"I know!" I raised my hands like one would do in elementary school, jumping up and down.. "Me, mee! Pick me, Nee-chan-sensei!"

"What?" she rolled her eyes at me. Meanie. Why don't you love me…

"It was…" I say with a completely serious face, pointing out a finger. Everyone leaned towards me, paying close attention. "It was!" I poke my finger into the air above me, having reached the end of the suspense.

"Women's intuition!" I say, and everyone groans. "Isn't it that thing that tells people stuff?" Almost immediately afterwards, Nee-chan's hand whacked the back of my head.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"BAKA!" she crossed her arms, a completely pissed off look on her face. "Now, completely ignoring my sister's idiocy, how could you guys tell?"

"It's the chakra systems." Hidan said, actually looking smart for once.

"The chock-fulla-what?" I'm confused, as usual. Wait… chakra sounds familiar… "Oh, I remember now! The thingie that lets the ninja do all their fancy-schmancy-jutsu stuff, right?"

"Uh-huh!" Tobi nods his head like a little kid. "And the she-devil… had a… had a…"

"Her chakra system was that of a trained shinobi." Hidan interrupted Tobi's child-like stutters.

"Because," Tobi interrupted Hidan back with his childish-teacher voice. "People like Aoi-chan and Midori-chan's chakras are everywhere. They are there, but not controlled, or fi… fi…" Poor boy was losing his train of thought, the word just at the tip of his hidden tongue.

Which brings up the question. What does that little happy-go-lucky fella look like under his mask? And does he or does he not have a fat tongue? Because mines is all big and fat. But I saw a picture online and this guy was sticking his tongue out and it was sooooo tiny!

Like, skinny as a twig! No, not that skinny. But it was small… and pink. Well of course it'd be pink, Aoi. Ever seen a non-food-influenced blue tongue? Or a purple one? exactly.

"Finessed," Midori helped him with that word, and he continued prattling on, interrupting my thoughts. Is it just me or do they like interrupting people a lot?

"Yeah, what Midori-chan said. Finessed!" I can definitely imagine Tobi as a preschool or kindergarten teacher. He'd be great with little kids. And then he'd annoy the heck outta the bigger ones.

"So they're quite easy to differentiate, really."

"Well, that's a bucket-load o' fun, ain't it?" I say. "Well you guys can go speculate why she's here, but as for me, I'm gonna take a nap."

"It's already 6:00." Hidan said in disbelief.

"Exactly why it's called a nap." I turn around to climb up the stairs. Except I ended up tripping halfway up the stairs. Yes, that's right, ladies and gentlemen; I can trip UP the stairs. Why? Because I'm so skillful like that. I can trip down the stairs, too, but that takes less skill.

And then I ended up falling backwards. I bet you people must be wondering how that's possible, also including the fact that I was tripping UP the stairs. Truthfully… I think it's my talent. My skill, my… me-thing, y'know?

Surprisingly, my butt didn't get to reunite with the cold, hard ground this time. Maybe later, Mr. Tushie. Wait… why is my tush a male tush? That's just awkward…Ms. Tushie. I opened my eyes to look up into Hidan's pretty pink-purple ones. Pretty? Since when have I ever thought about his eyes like that? And how does one come across eyes of that color in the first place?

"Are you okay?" he asks. For some reason, I can't stop staring at his face. Or his eyes. And yes, I do happen to like that particular shade of pink-purple…

"Oi!" Midori says, a cupping her hands to her face like a megaphone. "Get a room, you two!" Obviously, such comments as that made both our faces erupt into flames.

"**** you!" he said, pissed. Nee-chan smirked.

"Wouldn't you rather have my sister?" she raised an eyebrow in a way that only Nee-chan could accomplish. If I had been drinking water, it woulda been all over Hidan's face by now. And of course, if possible, my face turned an even darker shade of red, and everything started getting a bit woozy.

"S-Shut up!" as he said that, the world went black.

* * *

-[a bit later]-

I woke up in my bed, tucked in safely under the covers. Checking the clock next to my bed, I saw that it was 8:32. Might as well go back to sleep.

However, an entire half-hour of tossing and turning later, I still find myself unable to drift off into dreamlands. So my mind chose to wander off…

Why does Hidan' face keep on popping up in my head? And in my head, I doubt that he'd be as easy to chase off unlike real life… It's getting kinda hot in here, so I kick off some of the blankets. Stupid, stupid Hidan… It's bad enough having to see you in real life, so get outta my head!

And what's with my heart? I think it's going crazy.

I just think that's there's been too much excitement today.

-[end chappie]-

A/N: 890+words OTL I'M SORRY IT'S SO SHOOOORT *sobs*

MWAHAHA something's happening, at least.

Any ideas for any upcoming chapters? Because I'm completely out.

REVIEW because they remind me to get off mah lazeh tush…

Ja, ne! S1ssy-chan~ chu~


	32. AN

**A/N: no word count**

I'm alive! YESSSH!

And now for the downer. Um, I most likely won't ever update this story. *dodges thrown crap* It makes me cringe just thinking about those first chapters. It didn't even make any sense.

BUT! I'm working on something else- the Akatsuki Institution of Higher Education. So be a dear and review?...I hope I didn't misspell the title... hm... oh well.

And I _might_ rewrite this, seeing how it's an old favorite. And I'll start posting that once I get... um... five chapters written out. No more posting one chapter wonders! 'Cuz me and one-shots don't work that well.

Ahem. But yes, I'm alive. And I'll try updating that other one soon!

Hope to see you all soon!

And... uh... yeah I got rid of that last chapter. Made me cringe too.

Okay, I should be going now~ See ya!


End file.
